2 questions... please help!!

[kellybean]

1. I want to tell my GP about my phobia, but I'm afraid she will just brush it off. I am getting worse by the day. I'm afarid to eat ANYTHING and it has taken over my mind. Have any of you spoken to a professional about this problem and did they help you?





2. What do you all do when someone in your house is *ill*?


Thanks so much guys,


Kelly[img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img]

[eyecandi512]

Hi Kelly....


I would definietely suggest telling your doctor, she can refer you to a psychologist, or you can go right to a psch. yourself. Honestly, I wrote my doctor a letter and read it to her. I needed to know that I was telling her all the details because when I get nervous I leave out i the mportant information or don;t convey things as well as I would like. I waiting til I was panicky to write this letter, and let it all pour out. That way there was emotion and a sense of desparation she couldnt shrug off.


It is a truly documented phobia, so it's not just all in your head and your doctor should respect that and be able to handle it sympathetically and systematically refer you to whomever is necessary.


Good luck!


Oh....and when someone is my family is ill....I freak. I will sleep outside or over a friends house. I will not come back until the house has been extensively cleaned with antibacterial cleaning aids so much that i can SMELL them. The entire place needs to be aired out to get rid of the germs. And I will not eat in the intrim.


Sorry....not the best advice for you....this is one of my compulsions.

[sage]

Go to the Treatments thread and find the sticky topic at the top that's entitled "Information for Professionals" and print it off for your doctor. YOu might want to give it to her first, then make another appointment to discuss it once she's read it.


There's another sticky entitled "how to choose a therapist" or something like that...that should also be helpful to you.


On another note for everyone else: can anybody give me some idea as to why I have to point this out over and over to newbies? For some reason, when people have questions about treatments they don't go to the treatments thread. Or else the information isn't obvious there...or perhaps it needs to be somewhere else on the site where it's more easily found. Any suggestions that I could pass on to John would be helpful.

[faith-marilyn]

i look after them when they are ill, cos i no how horrible it is, so i cant just leave them. if i catch it, then thats a consequence i have to pay but id rather look after them cos i wudnt want them goin thru the same things that i would xxx

[Melikasa]

I have found that I can look after them. I took care of my husband 1. Because I have always been a nurturer and 2. I was kind of using him as a therapy.
I find that I can look after my son ok too. Mostly because I was able to deal with husband first and I dont want my little guy to have the same fear of being sick that I have had.
When it was anyone else (before i was married) I use to run though. So don't feel bad if you are not at where I am at with the being able to take care of someone.


Sage I think that the treatment thread is in the right place. If there is a way to put a heading somewhere though telling them to go there before coming to the active topics or general thread first.
I have found though that when I have done a search on emet that IES link don't go to the main page first it goes to general, stories or active topics. Not the main page where the Treatments threads are an option.

[sarahx]

I would definitely tell your doctor, it took me a few months to get up the courage to do it, but i felt so much better for telling him. And he has helped me out sooo much! If your doctor does brush it off or doesnt seem interested then either try and talk to them about it or find a different one! You should get some help before you get any worse as it cant be nice for you.


Sage: i hink people just post before looking at all the threads thats why we are always repeating ourselves, but nevermind eh? We can just direct them to the threads )


Sarah xxx

[Jenneh]

Sage -- i think they do look at the threads at the top of the treatment page but also write things out here for support. i dont think its necessary for you to remind them all the time, unless you just want to do it to be sure theyre getting the help they need. this post for example was asking for opinoins -- something u cant get on a fact sheet, howveer helpful.


kellybean -- i went to my Doctor about it- and of course, surprise surprise, she had no idea what it was. so i had to basically tell her, so she sorted out a psychaitric appointment for me, which was also next to useles. i hvent had the best times with professionals, dont hav much faith in them at the moment -- but hopefully the experirnces u have will be better.


good luck


Jen xxxxxxxxxEdited by: Jenneh

[eyecandi512]

Sage- I'm sorry to be so blunt, but I do not as though what you wrote in response to kelly was inappropriate. I felt it was downgrading, humilatiating and offensive. We are all here for support where it's written down or not. If someone comes with a wuestion that has already been answered, maybe they are panicking and/or have not been able to sort through all the posted threads. I do not feel it is a big deal to answer a question again.


I'm sorry, but that's just how I felt. IF the response was direted to me, I would have been highly offended.

[kellybean]

I just want to thank everyone for their help, I hope my doctor can help me.


Sage, I want to say that I asked the question here, because it is the "QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS" forum, and I had a question so I asked it. I wanted tohear other peoples experiences with their doctor before I talk to my own. It has nothing to do with mechosing a therapist, that would be up to my doctor to do...sorry if it bothered you.

[sage]

offensive? downgading? humiliating? to point someone to information that might help them? Geesh - sorry! I must have been TOTALLY misunderstood! I didn't mean SHE shouldn't ask the question...I wondered why so many people ask the same question, and whether the "answers" could be in a more prominent place so they are helped better.


And of course it didn't 'bother me' Kellybean- the questionyou asked- I EXIST here to answer such questions![img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img] What I meant to say, but didn't say very well was that perhaps if you gave your doctor an information sheet to read such as the one on the Treatments thread...then she would be less likely to "brush it off". You pointed out that your fear was she would do this. I was hoping to give you a strategy to alleviate your fear of her brushing it off. The "choosing a therapist" piece is a separate paper that, as I said, may also be helpful to you.


The last paragraph I was just simply posting a general question to othersso we couldbrainstorm ways to help people BETTER. Worried that I may be hit with a bus one day, and no one would ever again find the information. My goal is to help people - that's the ONLY reason I come here! Humiliating and offending people is just....egad!...NOT on my list - holy cow. I'm such a boob![img]smileys/smilies_08.gif[/img]


Yours in erronious communication...[DUH]"Sage" - lol.

[kellybean]

Sage, sosorry you were misunderstood. I guess I'm so used to having to defend myself about this problem that it just came naturally. Thanks for the info about the doctorand therapsit and I hopeyour not upset with me.


Kelly[img]smileys/smilies_09.gif[/img]

[Jenneh]

kellybean - that point was so interesting u made just then...


the way u feel u hav to defend urself withj this problem. i do that too a lot with my friend. if she says smthing lke "ur going out fine Jen, isnt that good" i feel shes tryin to say to me that i dont hav this phobia im just making it up -- so i get quite defensive - i hate the way i do that, but it just seems to happen unconciously.


Jen xxxx

[sage]

Hey kellybean,


Of course I'm not upset with you! In fact, I think I can safely say I just don't get upset. Maybe about world peace or laws that harm children of poverty...but not about conversations on internet forums for sure! I used to get very upset and be reactive and I think you're SO RIGHT about it being part of the disorder. We get all ashamed and defensive and defended, and then start lashing out at others to protect ourselves. Ya - I remember those days. 150 hours of therapy ago - lol!


Part of being cured of the phobia is also being "cured" of a lot of general anxious behavior that tends to project feelings onto others. I guess my point is that I just do not take things personally. Especially in print (cuz it's so easy to misunderstand someone), but even in person. I learned that the more upset, angry and yelling (projecting) someone else is the MORE I should know it's not about me, but about them and their issues. This really helps.


Of course, it's always important that we examine ourselves and our motives, etc. whenever someone is angry or upset at us. Cuz it could be something we've inadvertently done wrong or been neglectful about, and then we should appreciate the feedback cuz it helps us grow as a person and be more sensitive and compassionate to others. But it's neurotic to take responsibility for something that isn't our problem...ya know?


Anyway, no harm done. Actually, it's a good thing, all this. I figured out that indeed the thread "QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS" leads people to ask any question at all...I'm gonna put a sticky topic here now to point people over to treatments for that kind of info. Cool.


Thanks everyone!

[sage]

OH MY GOD - I AM THE DUMBEST ASS IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD.


I AM TOO STUPID TO LIVE!!!


I just went to the damn thread I've been sending everyone to for 6 months only to find I DON'T EVEN HAVE THE ARTICLE POSTED THERE!!!


Okay...she adds sheepishly...fixing that now![img]smileys/smilies_08.gif[/img]