A rant, sorry.

[pretendworld_]

So as part of my self-help ''recovery'' attempt, I spend a lot of time reading other people's experiences with v* - especially sv*'s etc. I've only had 1 sv* with v* in my life (thank goodness) but I am well aware that I will get many more during my life. I like to think I can prevent this from EVER happening, since it is awful...but especially if and when I have children - I'm sure to catch bugs from them. My concern is that I think all of this research is worsening my emet. I have read horrific stories of people who have been ill for days with both v* and d*. I know that a lot of emets don't get *as* sick as non-emets, but the thought of this terrifies me. I'm WAY more afraid of fp* and sv*'s than any other v*-related illness, as are most emets I would imagine. I just feel like this is ruining my life. I am TRYING so hard to recover; to live as normal as possible. But that fear is always there, it's just a matter of WHEN will I get really s* [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img] [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]

[ejb199]

hmm i personally DONT read any stories like this and really dont find them beneficial for self help for me. but thats me personally. i find that if i DO read stories about other peoples experiences, i start avoiding things they ate, or thinking i feel like they did. on here, if there are posts like "what made u sick last" i try to avoid. coz i know someone will write down say pizza, bread, pasta or something else yummy which i eat often! its just not worth it and always always makes me a billion times more anxious and gives me another thing to worry and obsess about. [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]

i think the thing is that instead of focusing on ways to avoid being sick, we have to turn this around to positive ways to deal with it WHEN it happens. coz it will happen again too. if we all live healthy long lives then chances are pretty good that we will be sick. i hate saying that coz it scares the crap out of me but i know deep down its true. we just have to find ways to cope with it when we are faced with it. and many of us know that when the worst HAS happened, it hasnt been so bad after all, life has carried on and we spent far too much time worrying 24/7. i know that doesnt help anything, and i constantly live in my little avoidance world. id rather carry on living like this and hope maybe i live till 80 and am not sick then let down my guard and put myself at risk... who knows... [img]smileys/smilies_05.gif[/img]

[alwaysafraid]

I agree. Is reading horror stories a good idea? I understand the concept of exposure but carfully introduced. You don't want to freak yourself out and make things worse.

Are you using other self help methods like learning to control anxiety? That's part of what I focus on and it's helped. Either way, I hope whatever you're doing works for you. Anything you do is better than doing nothing..just be selective about what you focus on. Good luck!

[pretendworld_]

I guess it is a dumb thing to do; I didn't realise this before though. I shouldn't try and relate myself or my experiences to other people because everyone is different. I know some people, like my parents NEVER get sick and then I have a few friends who do get sick quite a lot (compared to myself and my family etc..) so just because I read about people who get really, really sick - doesn't mean I will. I know I can try hard to keep up good hygiene, avoid sick people and eat properly cooked food but even that doesn't garantee me never getting sick again. I think I can get my head around the fact that it inevitably will happen again at some point, I'm just trying to cope better on a day-to-day basis and not let emet ruin my life so much. I know I'm lucky and don't have emet as bad as a lot of other people. I just wish I could be 100% non emet, like the vast majority of people out there. Ah, one can hope, right?

[cobainity]

So as part of my self-help ''recovery'' attempt, I spend a lot of time reading other people's experiences with v* - especially sv*'s etc. I've only had 1 sv* with v* in my life (thank goodness) but I am well aware that I will get many more during my life. I like to think I can prevent this from EVER happening, since it is awful...but especially if and when I have children - I'm sure to catch bugs from them. My concern is that I think all of this research is worsening my emet. I have read horrific stories of people who have been ill for days with both v* and d*. I know that a lot of emets don't get *as* sick as non-emets, but the thought of this terrifies me. I'm WAY more afraid of fp* and sv*'s than any other v*-related illness, as are most emets I would imagine. I just feel like this is ruining my life. I am TRYING so hard to recover; to live as normal as possible. But that fear is always there, it's just a matter of WHEN will I get really s* [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img] [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]

reading about it definately makes it worse.. my emet has become a lot worse since i could put a name on it, before i knew what it was, that it was a real thing it was a lot more easier to deal with.
also, just wanted to mention, don't let emet stop you having kids if thats what you want, i find it really sad when i hear that there are so many women out there who are too scared because of the morning s* etc, and catching things of your kids is highly unlikely, i have a 2 year old and i never get what she gets, they have really low immune systems and kids get poorly a lot but it's all stuff that we had when we were little so we're immune to it x

[asianeko]

I think Sage has some really good desensitization resources she has up on a sticky in the Success Stories area. There was another desensitization thread around here somewhere. That seems to be what you're trying to do reading stories, those may help more.

[paulinek]

Those sort of articles freak me out too, so also avoid them, and I agree with Emma if i hear someone else say something has made them ill it gets added to my own personal blacklist of things i'll never touch again so it's best not to read in the first place if you can help it.

I also agree that i think i would rather be a paranoid emet forever and that help me avoid getting s* rather than be a normal person and potentially expose myself to something through being lax. I was doing pretty good compared to my worse moments when i did get an sv and probably wasn't as careful as i was before and am now.

Even though it happened to me 7 months ago, the thought of v* ever again in my whole life terrifies me too, although i do know that i found the strength to get through it once and so could do it again, although i'd rather not have to!

That day I had the sv i went a-googling to see how long i was likely to v* for with noro and was horrified to see reports of it being days, but i think that is innacurate in that you do feel ill for a few days but the v* was limited (for me anyway) to three bouts over 12 hours, and if i'd had proper anti-emetics it probably wouldn't even have been that bad, so get those thoughts of days of being ill rout of your head!

Easier said than done but try and forget about those horror stories you have read, focus in the here and now and don't dwell on what may or may not happen in the future. have a good weekend x

[stromko]

Whenever I hear people relating their symptoms to me, symptoms that correlated with them having v*, I'll usually start to notice those symptoms in everyday life and get freaked out by them. If you were never bothered by those everyday symptoms before, just like if you were never bothered by certain foods before you heard these terrible stories, then obviously the difference is all in your mind.

I've heard it's pretty regular for phobics to have a fascination with incidences of what we fear, and so I understand that you'd read these stories. It might not even be a bad way to desensitize yourself, but first you need to healthy enough to see them therapeutically instead of being scared of them.

Don't start thinking that it's inevitable that you'll be ill someday and let that dread be the focal point of your life. Fact is you might not, I have never had 'it' happen again since I became an emetophobe, about ten years ago. It used to happen every year or so in a pretty regular cycle, and then stopped when I became phobic. I felt unwell all the time due to anxiety, and I was convinced for about a year and a half that there was something physically wrong with me.

I've certainly had plenty of SV's and possibly even FP since then, but the worst that's happened is I've been really scared and had panic episodes at inconvenient times. It's gotten to the point that I fear the panic and stress surrounding the stimuli, more than I do the focus of this panic and stress, because panic is, after all, fear. It's the scary part, the actual thing I fear is something that lots of people go through without much fear, and that isn't a big deal to lots of people.

Lots of people choose to do that which we fear, simply because it eases other symptoms and they've learned it seems to let them recover from illness faster. When you fear it as more than anything else, it becomes quite possible to just not let it happen.

[pretendworld_]

That really does make a lot of sense. I think I was trying to desensitize myself to the reality of what can happen with v* but instead it only made me worry more. I also worry that if I were to ever recover fully, I would get sick every year. I just feel like non-emets get sick SO frequently that this will happen to me. But the truth is, even non-emets can go years without v*, but it's just because I read all of these horrific stories that makes me feel like it's a regular occurance for other people. I think I also read this stories because I'm so unfamiliar with sv*s. I'm sure I've had a few in my life but only one that caused v* when I was 10 - and it can on so suddenly - I didn't even feel n* or anything...so I just want to prepare myself for WHEN it happens next. [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]

[jkl81]

Just remember how many people are out here on the internet. It sounds like you are lucky genetically you are not prone to SV and you are going to be careful. Your phobic mind is your worst enemy it tells you that if you do get sick and v* then you're vulnerable just like anyone else and if you haven't v*ed in ages why then your number must be up soon. It's true any of us could get sick but it's in no way inevitable. That's probably the way IES has helped me most by seeing a) Even emets survive if and when they do v* b) it's possible to do most/many normal things and go virtually forever without v*ing.