I almost lost it

[eyecandi512]

Hello everyone,


I have not feeling feeling so well since the horrific camoing trip this past weekend. I did not eat anythin but a cracker and apotato chip all weekend. Monday I ate an apple, 2 cookies, a few candy corns and a cracker. I started to feel sick to my stomach monday night with my boyfriend. I toughed it out, but then when I woke up today I felt quite sick. I went to the bathroom a few times and then slept til my 3:30 class where I toldmyself I had to go, but only to get the assignment for the next class and get a graded essay. I dediced to be tough and stay til the midway break. Then after the break I figured if I was ok for that long, I was strong enough to stay for the enitre class. About 20 minutes after the break I heard a girl cough in the hallway really hard. Then she ran to the bathroom and started getting sick (our classroom is right across from the bathroom) I IMMEDIATELY panicked grew quite pale and felt dizzy. I held my ears and started pressing my pen into my skin and doodling to easy the anxiety. It was over quickly, but then I became obssessed with watching people in the hallways seeing if they were going into the bathroom. I wanted to run....but I MADE myself stay in the class til the end.


I was telling myself all the while I was going to skip my next class, but I tried to be very very strong and take small step, and I made it to my next class. We were watching a movie and had pizza and snacks during it. I was a little uncomfortable with the food, but my friend talked me into having half a slice of pizza without the cheese or sauce. I did and I felt fine. I was going to again leave on the break, but I mustered up the courage to stay for the entire 1.5 hour movie and class.


This was indeed an accomplishment for me. I really battled today and finally won! I'm quite proud of it, although I still don't feel great, but I think I'll be ok for now. Im getting kinda scared b/c it is night time and im afraid to go to sleep when I dont feel good, but Im going to try to and see how it works out.


Thanks for listening.....finally I got one up versus the emet!! [img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]

[faith-marilyn]

im sorry you wer feeling so bad, and reading your story brings back the horrible feeling when u hear someone vomit - it happened to me twice in skool when someone was sick in the toilet cubicle nxt to me! Anyway, it's absolutely GREAT that u got thru that day, it was very brave of u and i hope u can use this experience to show urself in the future that u can get thru it.
love always
faith-m xxxx

[confused]

wow! you should be proud of yourself! you did a great job staying when you didn't feel well and you heard someone get sick! I don't think I would have been able to stay. It sounds like you aren't eating much, which can cause you to feel sick. Try to eat something light like toast or soup. because sometimes just being overly hungry can make you feel horrible. Give yourself a good pat on the back, for all you accomplished!


Danielle

[Melikasa]

Two BIG thumbs up there hun. I think that was a great accomplishment. Those were big steps. I always HATE hearing or knowing someone is getting sick. It was always something that sent me into a pannick as well. Pushing till the end AND eating something was an amazing step.
As confused said, make sure you eat. NOT eating is more likely to make you sick than eating. Even if they are smaller meals more often.
Big hugs and way to go.

[Jenneh]

thats really gr8 u managed to get thru all that anxiety u faced today. i feel proud when i manage to take control over emet, im sure u do too.


Jen xxxx

[eyecandi512]

Thank you all for your posts....they really mean a lot to me. I want to give you all an update. I was soooooooooooo close to completing my week of classes (I have thursday and Friday off) MY goal was the have perfect attendence (except if I was truly ill--in which case i'm usually not-knock on wood). I braved it through all week as you saw in the beginning of the thread, but I lost last night. I'm quite upset about it too. I tried to go to sleep before midnight last night so I would have a good nights rest and be able to complete my week. I ate a piece of cheese before I went to bed so I could take my birth control pill. Then I layed down and had to much on my mind I couldnt sleep....sometimes I get repitious thoughts. Anyway, I went to the bathroom and came back sdownstairs to lay down....then I HICCUPED....only once, but I was sure since I wasn't feeling well that I was a goner. I freaked out. I cut all my finger nails off til they were little itty bitty stubs, then my toenails....anything to ease the anxiety. I guess eventually I fell asleep, but it was definitely past 3:30. I missed my first class [img]smileys/smilies_07.gif[/img]. I tried so hard and ruined it. This phobia takes over everything, my sleep, eating habits, school, private life, social life.....I hate it.


I know I should focus on how I managed to get through most of my week....but this has been going on so long with missing classes and what not, and Im so sick of it. I try so hard and always have a set back. I always start out the semester thinking it'll be different and I;m going to accmplish so muc, and I'm lucky if I just get all my work finished.[img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]


I'm sorry to rant. Anyone else have similar experiences?