Does this mean anything?

[r311dude]

I don't know why this thought never occured to me before, but I was discussing with a friend the last time when I threw up. It was August 9th 1997 at 11:12pm (hah i remembered). I remembered feeling scared as hell before doing it, but moments before it happened, I felt at ease and just let it go. But, I remember the next day at school I was able to eat a part of a cookie at lunch and feel fine. Does that mean anything? But than again, I didn't know I had emet at that time, but I knew I had something. Do you think the fact that I 100% know I have emet now would effect whether forcing myself to vomit would help me at this stage?


Just a thoughtEdited by: r311dude

[Jenneh]

i hav to say first off tht im sorry if i took the post wrong... i've read it over a couple of times, but still dont quite fully understand it, sorry.... my bad..


but i also was last sick in 1997, lol, and i remember doing it then, i was as scared as hell, but because i didnt have emet, afterwards i didnt dwell on it over nd over nd over..


but i find now, that i know i have emet, i think i'd dwell on it a lot more, i wudnt let it go, even tho im just as scared now as i was before.. i'd also be less reluctant to just let it go...


which in a way is hindering me getting better, because as my social worker sed, i focus too much on the fact i hav this phobia, that has a good chance of taking over my life.


Jen xxxxxx

[sarahx]

I know what you mean... everytime ive been sick even while ive been emet, ive had afeeling of calm right beofre i am sick. But that doesnt stop me being scared tho.


As for making yourself sick to help you get over emet, i am totally against the idea. We know that realistically ppl don vomit that often, so why make ur self do it? Even tho ive been sick twice while ive had emet it hasnt helped me getover it. But thats just my view. Exposure therapy might be good but not makin urself vomit.? I dont know lol!


Sarah xxx

[emms]

I can understand the "calm before the storm." There's a point when you know it's going to happen and you just have to prepare yourself.


As for making yourself sick, I think that Sarah is right. Emet, in my experience, is about control (or lack there of), and v*ing is something that many of us cannot control. If you force yourself, you still have control.(Not to mentionan eating disorder??) I don't know if it would help, but I cannot imagine that itwill change your feelings...? I think that exposure is a better route...desensitising yourself to it all together.


As most of this is the pot calling the kettle black, please excuse my ramblings! Best of luck!

[Melikasa]

Well since everyone is different I can see it helping. I know that not stopping myself the other night seemed to help a lot. I was even able to go to work nauseated. There ARE times I know that knowing I have emet has made things worse but for me just the knowledge that I am not a freak has helped me get through this.
It is something you will have to try if you feel you can handle it. I have to say that when I was younger that I COULDN'T even make myself sick. Even when I swallowed too many ASA by accident. My mom kept saying just let it all out. I would spit and that would be as far as it went.

[mbs730]

Yep, that calm before the storm... I know how that is. Man I should be scared as hell too since it happened twice this month, on the 1st and on the 20th. However the anticipation is MUCH worse than the actual event as far as I am concerned. And I also got that "wow that wasnt so bad" feeling too after it happened but... the sad thing is, I am still my emet self. MAYBE MAYBE MAYBE I am a LITTLE less phobic of myself being sick than even before, sure would be panicky if I was really nauseated again but I think at the same time I wouldnt fight it either since I would know that its not AS bad as we fear.. but I dunno. It seems like over the past few days my emet has worsened as far as me being worried of others around me being sick, and that has been bad enough from the start. But I would say now I am morbidly phobic of others being sick!!! I guess that is stemming from knowing that my husband's CT scan is in less than 6 weeks now and there is a chance I could possibly face him being sick!! Gosh no I hope not.


Miriam

[mbs730]

Oh and as far as you forcing yourself? I say NO! Let me tell you something.. IT WONT cure you of your emet! I debated on that many times before until I did it naturally recently... I mean really IMO the BEST thing to do is... if you FEEL naturally sick like your are about to v then DONT FIGHT IT next time...it MIGHT help you A LITTLE, I honestly think I am LESS phobic of myself, but that wasnt the biggest factor of my phobia, oh God I dont know... dont listen to someone who doesnt have it all together like myself, uggh.


Miriam