Is it bad that the only time I feel good is when I'm drinking? It's like
once I catch that buzz nothing scares me. I'm so calm and I can eat
and be social. I feel normal. I can even see and talk about the v word
and I can just laugh it off. Sometimes I think I should go back to
drinking all the time like I did before but then again I don't want to
go down that road again. Ugh I hate that I feel so good right now and
I'm so calm and comfortable but it takes drinking to get me here.



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