Ok-mom question--is this normal?????

[donna1216]

I know there are a couple of other moms out there who may or may not be able to help me!! My daughter is 2 and a half, she had her tonsils out this year because they were so HUGE, they were causing her to gag, and not breathe. Well, when she gets mad/upset and starts to cry, then she makes herself gag!! She gagged so hard that she v***ed tonight. I don't know what to do about it!!! Should I punish her for this???? It's not like she is crying because she is hurt, she's crying because she is mad and hasn't gotten her way. She has never done the gagging thing from a legitimate cry!!

[jazz]

maybe you should calmly explain to her that making herself sick wasn't a very clever thing to do,and by doing that she's kept you up, and she's not doing her throat or her tummy any favours..
say to her that she shouldn't make herself sick if there's nothing really wrong, don't hold it against her, just reason fairly.

[hazy]

Lots of kids do this, because they realise that if they're sick they get attention. The best way todeal with itis to (if you can) clean her up and completely ignore the fact that she's made herself sick.They say you're not supposed to make eye contactas she needs to know that it's not acceptable behaviour. Also, from an emet point of view, remember that it is behaviour and she's most likely doing it on purpose, so at least it's not going to be anything catchy!


Good luck!

[hippychick]

I would say she knows that when she gagged etc from having the huge tonsils she got attention and so now when she wants her own way she'll do the same thing. I don't know how you would go about solving that hazy's advice sounds good to me. don't give in or give her the attention or she will just keep doign it i think. Thats just my opinion and i dont have kids so feel free to ignore me lol


x

[faith-marilyn]

no, dont shout at her, and i probably wouldnt even tell her that she shudnt do this becausd she will be sick. it wil only make ur child have hostile feelings towards vomiting and cause her to think its a bad thing, and she will end up emet. if she doesnt have a prob with vomiting then leave her to it, leave it as a relaxed matter so no anxiety is caused around the topic of vomiting!
xxxx

[2jo2]

This is going to sound odd coming from an emet, but I remember doing this myself one time when I was a child. I have always been afraid of others v*ing but about 10 years ago I started being afraid of myself v* because I realized that I hadn't done it in a while, and a bug went thru my family and I was afraid to get it because I was afraid I'd forgotten how to v. Anyways, as a child, I used to go and visit my dad because my parents are divorced, and there were times I felt "clingy" with my mom and didn't want to see my dad. This was one of those times, I cried and didn't want to go so I made myself v* on the floor. I got the attention I wanted from my mom (clingy) and I didn't have to go to my dad's. This incident happened probably 20 years ago, and your story just triggered my memory. Kids do these sorts of things, I don't think your child should be punished, or she may end up emet as well. I agree with everyone's advice about ignoring, because it's an unacceptable way to get attention and the child must learn that. Good luck!

[e-lizabeth]

Don't punish her for it - first of all, she's really young and doesn't have complete control over her emotions or how she acts on them. Don't reward it, but don't punish it. Second of all, I can't imagine that you want her to associate vomiting with punishment - that could turn anyone into an emetophobe. Again, just don't reward the behaviour by giving in to what she wants.

[barefootanjel]

I'm not even so sure that it sounds like she purposely made herself sick.


My little boy will sometimes scream so violently that he makes himself gag and once had such a temper-tantrum that he made himself sick.


Sometimes kids will yell so much that they make their throat raw and this induces the gag reflex,as they're not so attuned to preventing it,this will often lead them to *v.


The only thing that works with my lad is to hold him tight,rock him gentlyand make soothing noises in his ear-hole till he shuts up! LOL


My advice is to try a few soothing gestures before the tantrum gets out of control.

[sage]

This probably sounds ridiculous, but it may be that your anxiety makes her worse. I say ridiculous, cuz of course I know you have an anxiety disorder - lol - so of course you're anxious.And if you could fix that you would, for more reasons than what's happening with your daughter right now. However, children DO pick up on mom's anxiety. Everyone counseled well here when they said to try to stay as calm as you can. The temptation will be to give into her demands in future because you fear she will get mad and freak out and vomit. Try to stick with your values and limitations - whatever they are - despite this fear. Just stay calm. Don't punish her of course not... but also don't freak out about it yourself.


Try to spend some extra "quality" time with her when she's not upset...the hospital stay and surgery probably triggered anxiety in her, and if you were anxious at the time, this would have made it worse. What she needs is a calm, stable mom. Once she's more secure, she's less likely to get so upset anyway.


Hope this helps (and I've got 3 grown kids who did all sorts of stuff when they were 2...they all turned out great however!)

[donna1216]

Well, Haley is definitely not an emet, thank goodness!! She was choking on a piece of apple last night, so I gave her a finger sweep and got most of it out of her mouth, but she still v'ed EVERYWHERE--it was AWFUL!!! As soon as she was finished, she went into the bathroom, said, "I need to bwush my teef", brushed her teeth and then proceeded to run and jump and destroy the house with her sister!! I'm glad she handles it as calmly as her father does!

[parrotxoxo]

When kids have tantrums, its because they are waiting for their audience response. My son used to throw huge fits, coughing, gagging.....I completly ignored him like he wasnt even there. When no one is looking, there is much less drama! LOL I believe that the phrase "All the world's a stage" was created for screaming 3 year olds!


If you react at all.... you are giving her exactly what she wants, and the tantrums will continue.....just ignore it, leave the room. Trust me, it works like a charm!