I feel like its restricting me

[Potatoescangiggle]

Sorry this is a bit long but I haven’t been able to talk with anyone who understands how strong this phobia is and how it controls your life. I just really wanted someone to share with. I know a lot of the things I am worried about are long in the future but I've tried therapy but it isn’t helping. My mom doesn’t see the seriousness of my phobia and constantly jokes around with it and my friends aren’t very helpful either. I don’t see any way I can beat this phobia.

I'm 12 years old and have been living with emethphobia since kindergarten. Over the years it has grown into more of a problem and now I feel like it has taken away a lot of opportunities. Such as:

I absolutely love children and now feel like I could never have any because of morning sickness and then having to care for them. How am I supposed to care for my children and husband if I'm scared to death? I also have a hard time babysitting since kids don’t know what their body is telling them.

I am constantly in fear while at school since I am surrounded by people. I fear that the person next to me might get sick or that the topic might come up. I'm scared to go to college and I wake up before school fearing someone could get sick and at school I plan out the best way to stay at least 20 feet away from the nurses office at all times. I don’t want to do sports because I'm afraid of someone getting sick during practice.

When someone in my family is sick I have to leave the house. It’s terrible knowing that I can’t even live in the security of my own home.
At home I am always checking the food expression dates and won’t eat food if it doesn’t look right or smells weird.

Going away to camp is hard because anyone could get sick at any time and you all have to sit in the same van on the trip up and back.

I'm always very uneasy while watching a new movie in the theaters since fake sickness has become a regular thing in PG-13 movies.
I'm worried I might become addicted to pepto bismol since I tend to take it on a regular basis as a placebo.

The only thing I can find useful out of my phobia is that I am sure I will never drink or do drugs because of the effect you have after. But I also know that in the future I will always be turning down invites to clubs and won’t be able to help a drunken friend get home.

I feel stuck. I feel like I can’t do anything with my life because of the possibility of having a panic attack- crying and shaking.
Once I start to think about my phobia I can’t stop and freak myself out terribly before I can get my mind off the topic.

I'm scared.

All the time.

[olschesky]

welcome to the forum........i know exactly how you feel.....maybe if you show your mom the information and question and answer part of this site she will get a better understanding on just how terrifying this phobia is to us.......that's how i told my husband about it last year........i've always kept it to myself.

there are lots of emet moms on this site and they might be able to help you see how you can have a real life with children. i've never really cared about having kids and neither did my husband so i haven't been through it.

as far as day to day life.....you really have to push yourself a little everyday to do things that seem scarey to you.......when you see that they didn't make you s you will move on to something else. usually when i do something that scares me i end up getting distracted by something and the emet thoughts disappear. i've developed lots of distractions for when i panic.....i play trivia games online, i knit, i do sodoku puzzles or word games......something i really have to concentrate on.

hopefully you will find lots of comfort and help in here dealing with this stupid phobia........we all understand