I was driving back to work from my lunch break (I spend my lunch hour at home) and I started thinking about all the funny things I avoid doing because they are thing I did the last time I got... ill.

I then for some reason started thinking "Yeah I'm going to go after work and just drive around town doing all the stupid things and driving all the routes I've been avoiding out of... well I don't know why but I've just been avoiding driving this one particular route because I drove that way the night I got ill.

So anyway, I actually felt properly up for doing this, like I was going to be able to break free of the avoidance behaviour. But then later at work I started thinking about it again and suddenly I was too scared to do what I said I'd do earlier that day.

It's odd because when I thought about defying my avoidances, I felt no fear but real excitement about going on the offensive for a change. But later that fear crept back in and now I still want to avoid everything I associate with the night I got ill.

Any thoughts on this?

Strannik