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Thread: hurting

  1. #1
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    Ive just found out my exbf was cheating on me. I thought he was and asked him but he denied it. Anyway it was true. I feel so hurt, not only that it happened but that he lied even after we had split up. I feel stupid too

  2. #2
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    Nicki, he's the stupid one, not you. You were intelligent enough to realise when the relationship was over, even before you even knew about this other girl, so please don't feel stupid. At least now you know what a complete sh*t he is and you can move on knowing that he was a pr*ck and you've got nothing to feel bad about because you did nothing wrong. Hopefully he'll mess things up with her and then he'll realise what he missed out on. By which time you'll have moved on and be having a great old time without him!!

  3. #3
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    The joys of being cheated on. Do not feel stupid about that, so many of us have gone thru that before and its not our faults, remember that. And the next guy you meet, follow those gut instincts of yours again, if you feel he can't be trusted, move on right away! Save yourself the heartache in the end. I say this because if you suspected your ex was cheating on you, and it ended up being true, then you got some serious inner instincts that you should always listen too.


    Keep your chin up, you will move on and not feel this way anymore!


    Sonia

  4. #4
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    REMEMBER THIS: You CAN live on without a lover in your life.


    I found out ALOT of hurtful things that my ex did to me the other day, and this was stuff that happened yeeeaaarrrsss ago. I'm not going to say I wasn't upset and distraught, because I was, and somewhat still am. But PLEASE try not to worry about it, your 20(?) and you have so much of your life ahead of you, and so do I so we need to make sure it DOESN't affect us, stand strong... show him what we're made of in a way [img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img]


    We're ALL here for you Nicki, please don't forget that [img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]


    Peace, Love and all the Rest..


    Jackie xx

  5. #5
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    Nicki,



    I don't understand why people feel stupid when someone else does the
    stupid thing. Your ex is the one who cheated. Your ex
    is the one who disregarded the boundaries of your relationship.
    Why should you feel stupid? You cannot, nor should you, be
    accountable for someone else's actions. Fortunately,
    you learned what a cad your ex is and are no longer entangled with
    him. I have learned through my life journey that people who want
    to deceive are very good at their craft, so it is not a reflection on
    you that you did not know until after you broke up. Try, if you
    can, to see this as a life lesson - one that will help you grow and
    make different choices in the future.



    Stella





  6. #6
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    I like that way of looking at things, Stella. There's nothing shameful about only seeing the good in people, it's not naive, it's judging others how you would expect to be judged and treated. If they let you down then it's their lookout and we should move on, learn from it, but notlet it affect the way we treat others going forward from that.

  7. #7
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    Aww..Nicki, so sorry to hear that. breakups are always hard, especially when they ended like this.


    i know NOTHING anyone can say can make you feel better, but things you can do to distract yourself and not think about the jerk include, having a nice warm bath, getting a massage, shopping, icecream, any comfort food, exercise. do something nice for you!


    best wishes, if you need to talk, message me.


    .I just want to feel safe in my own skin. I just want to be happy again. I just want to feel deep in my own world. But I’m so lonely I don’t even want to be with myself. <3

  8. #8
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    Thanks for your replies. Ive been in school all morning on work experience, it was my first day so luckily that has taken my mind off things. I guess i feel stupid because deep down i knew something was going on but i tried to ignore the fact it was happening because i was scared to be alone.

  9. #9
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    Nicki,


    A change like that in your life is never easy, and then to find out that he was cheating makes it even harder. These kinds of people take advantage of your trust, they lie through their teeth. It's not your fault at all. I hope you don't feel bad about yourself, because it was totally him. I'm sorry you're hurting.
    In memory of the sweetest german shepherd I ever had the pleasure of knowing. I love you, Duncan. 3/12/02 - 12/19/11

  10. #10
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    Nicki, you know i hate that a-hole anyways! you are so much better than him. I am so sorry that he cheated on you. i have been in that situation so i can empathize a little. it hurts, and it pisses you off. Dont feel stupid, you should've been able to trust him. as i've said before you dont need him, and you deserve a LOT better! take care of YOU nicki.
    -megan
    DO IT TREMBLING IF YOU MUST,
    BUT DO IT!! -unknown

    Go for it now. The future is promised to no one. -dr wayne dyer

 

 

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