Let’s try this!

[shiva]

I had an idea this morning while driving to work. I thought it might help for us to share with others things that we do to help us in our own daily lives as an attempt to conquer this phobia.


As I mentioned before, I recently found a great psychologist! I love her to death, she has been very helpful. In my therapy with her, the first thing that we worked on was relaxation and breathing. This is now something that I do all day long.. Anytime I feel the slightest twinge of anxiety or stress, I begin my relaxation and breathing. I even do it when I am not anxious just to get used to being relaxed as often as possible.


I have also started working out daily. I begin every day with 30 minutes of excercise. It really does help reduce general anxiety, plus helps the immune system, so I of course see that as a plus


The biggest problems that I have to face with my emet is where my daughter is concerned. Six months ago when I began therapy, I could not sleep at all. I would check my daughters head all night long for fever. As I tried to fall asleep, all I could envision was her coming into my bedroom and saying "Mommy, my tummy hurts" and then getting sick all over. (although this scenario has never happened, it was all i could imagine.) I was put on a small dose of antipsychotics for anxiety. I am one of those who get manic when put on an ssri, go figure. This medication definitely took the edge off of this night time anxiety, but I still had to do some work to get through the night. First thing I did was I would NOT let myself go into her room and feel her head. No matter how much it kills me, I will not do it. Secondly, now when I immagine that scenario above, I also immagine myself dealing with it, while I immagine this, I do deep breathing. I immagine me sitting there with her and telling her that it is okay. I immagine that I am experiencing no anxiety what so ever. I really think that this is helping.


When I start to think about all the what if's, I start to tell myself positive things. Or, instead of letting myself say that I can't, I TRY really hard to tell myself that I CAN DEAL with this. I am also trying to become more educated on viruses and our immune system, along with how our bodies work and our digestive system. In doing this I am learning many things that will help my health overall. I am trying to eliminate sugar from my diet and eat healthy along with taking vitamins and supplements that I feel comfortable with.


I hope that maybe someone got at least one idea from my post to help them get one step closer to defeating this phobia. And, I hope that this topic attractslots more posts and you all give input that will possibly help me. I know that all of our situations are different, so if many of us contribute to these ideas it will be more likely that each of us can take at least one thing from some one elses post and use it to make their lives less stressful.

[carmagnet]

every time I feel like I might be sick, which isn't very often, I start to get a little panicky, I go into the bathroom and I look myself DEAD in the eye and I firmly say, "I AM NOT AFRAID!" I say it with conviction, and meaning. if they anxiety doesn't go down I stand infront of the potty and say I AM NOT AFRAID! If my body says otherwise I just stand there and wait. then eventually the anxiety fades and I feel better.

[helsbels]

Carmagnet does that really work? I'll have to try that next time it happens to me. I don't really suffer from the anxieties unless I'm faced with a situation, what I mean is I'm not an emet that goes around worrying about this, that and the other. I live how I want to live without worrying about the consequences, that means I never get n* from anxiety. However, if I do get n*, it feels ten times worse because I know it's real, there's a reason for it so I get into a right state, and I mean a right state. Even though I haven't v* for 18 years! I've been reading a few people's posts recently about the power of positive thought and I'm really keen to give it a go. Unfortunately that means I'll have to wait until the next time I feel n*, which I don't relish happening but there you go...


I also exercise, try not to drink too much caffeine and alcohol, do things to chill out like read, sew, listen to music, dance, and I also do a lot of cooking and I concentrate on making myself a varied diet with hardly any convenience foods, loads of veg and a fair bit of spicy food if the truth be known. I also like to eat out, and I rarely get ill from doing so, very rarely, and when I say 'ill' I mean like bloat, stomach ache, d* that sort of thing... which you do sometimes get when you change your diet, but it's normal and I try not to worry about it too much if it does happen.


I do have my emet moments though, but I try very hard to push them to the back of my mind and not dwell on them too much, although this is far easier said than done I know. Recently I've been thinking a lot about how I will react when my partner gets ill, as thankfully it hasn't happened yet in the two years we've lived together. I've been trying to tell myself that when it happens I will be strong, caring, supportive, not panic... hmmm be interesting to see if it actually happens [img]smileys/smilies_12.gif[/img]


Thanks

[shiva]

I think it's really quite an accomplishment that you don't let emet control your life. That is awesome. But you bring up a good point. I also wonder what I will do if/when my fiance gets sick. I suspect he's been sick and not told me so that I won't freak. Does anyone have any ideas about how in the world to cope with this one? What are some things that we can tell ourselves when we are faced with this?


I'm clueless on this one... It's easier when dealing with our kids because we understand that they are kids and need our help and compassion when they are not feeling well. I know I will have a much harder time when I have to deal with it with an adult.


Funny story... My ex-husband was sick from kidney stones and I yelled at him to get out of the house and made him drive himself to the hospital... Man, that was wrong..

[princessmel]

I weight train 3 or 4 times a week which helps with anxiety, keep myself busy, go out and do things, and I try not to dwell on it. [img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]

[luckistar2]

Hello,


I try not to make myself sick. When I hear that someone else has been ill (at work, school, or at home) I will start to feel like I am getting sick too. My symptoms are caused by my fear. I will start to feel nauseous, feverish, and such. I need to not let my stress and fear make me ill. I have been trying really hard to calm myself down in these situations.


Yesterday, my roommate told me that she had food poisening. I had to work hard to convince myself that I didn't have food poisening too. Even though we hadn't eaten any of the same foods.


I realize there will be times when I genuinally am sick but I cannot get worked up over nothing.

[Babydoll]

thats alot of helpful info! those tips are good


when Im panicing, I try to invision the most horrible vision I can imagine. it actually helps me. then i ask myself, so what?


heres an example. Im in the classroom, all of a sudden I start feeling sick, and terrified If i panic and throw up everyone will see me and Ill have no where to go and hide, so i ask myself, okay, so what? well, I might feel horrible, loose control and they might laugh at me. so what? well, i might feel super embarassed? so what?.... and then I realize, its not that bad afterall, and i close my eyes, take deep breaths, and calm down. i find it helps stop panic attacks before it starts. everyone is different though.


keep the tips coming!

[sydoz]

I usually talk to someone else when I'm panicking. I think it helps to talk to someone outside of the problem because they can talk you out of it more easily. I usually call my parents or my boyfriend and they just talk to me until it passes.


On a separate note: Carly I just looked at your website and you have the cutest cats! I love cats, but I only have one - for now!

[hippybamagirl]

Working out is SUCH a good way to deal with this phobia because it boosts your body's seratonin levels which just makes you feel that much better. I like to take vitamen C every day, too. It helps with the immune system. Little things are good, too - not sharing food with people and wiping down door knobs, etc. with chlorox wipes.

[bethany]

i agree exercise is great thing to do. it really helps. i was doing great when i was doing yoga for awhile i found that that REALLY helped. i need to start up again. I think all of us should do it.

i get on here when i'm panicking

[helsbels]

Shiva, I can totally relate to your experience with your ex-husband. I went on holiday once with an ex-boyfriend and he got s* one night. I panicked and ran screaming from the apartment, and when I summoned up the courage to go back I threw him out and made him sleep on a sun lounger by the pool !! God knows what everyone else in the apartments thought had happened.... I chuckle about it now because I have to, but it's not ideal. When I'm home with my partner, like you, I suspect he's hidden it from me in the past because he knows I'm scared, but I've promised myself I won't behave like that again, I will be there for him if he needs me. I think with guys though, it doesn't really bother them, if he's ill, he'll just get on with it and it won't make a difference to him if I'm there or not, not like it would with me. If and when it happens I'm going to try the positive thought route, I'll repeat to myself over and over.... 'I am not afraid' 'this is not bothering me' 'I can be there for him, to help him' stuff like that.... see if it works.

[shiva]

That is a good idea, helsbels. I am such a believer in positive self talk!


OMG! That is sooo funny that you made him sleep on the sun lounger out by the pool! hahaha! I bet he didn't think that it was very funny, and I am sure that you didn't at that time, either. It is kinda humorous to look back on though, isn't it?


I remember when my daughter was 3 and had influenza. She started to vomit and I didn't know what to do with her. I was running around the house holding her out and away from me. I ran into the kitchen... crap! dishes in the sink. I darted up the steps to the bathroom, where she stood over the toilet getting sick, and for somereason I found myself singing twinkle twinkle little star Don't ask me, I have no idea. But, while I was running around the house with her, she had gotten sick another couple of times. Once on the kitchen floor and once on the way up the steps. My husband laughed when he got home from work, calling Jade my little "puke gun". At the time I could not find the humor in it, but now looking back, the whole scenario is pretty amusing.

[helsbels]

A lot of non-emets actually make light of v* incidents and laugh about them afterwards, to us we think that's disgusting because the last thing we want to do is talk about it, but I think there's a lot to be said for using humour to get you through a situation. I mean non-emets don't like v* either, they're just not terrified like we are, but because they don't like it they make a joke out of it, I wonder if that's something else we could try?


The fact that you stood there singing as well while you're daughter was ill... I mean how many times have we all tried to distract our minds while we've felt n*? I put music on, or watch TV. Also I think it probably did a lot to soothe your daughter as well so it seems perfectly logical to me... another good tip we could try!

[shiva]

Positive Self Talk! That is what I am working on all day today. Anytime anything negative comes into my little head, I am switching it right over to something positive. Whether it be germ/phobia related, school related, work related anything. No negative thoughts going on here today!


One idea for those of you who may be worried about recently being exposed to the dreaded virus or having someone in your family who is currently sick... Think instead of ..."Will I get this? Oh no!" Remember the last time you were exposed to it or the last time it hit your house and did not get spread! I remember as a child, my sister would have strep or I would have a tummy virus and we would never pass it to eachother and we shared a room! The past 2 tummy viruses that my daughter had, no one else in the family caught it. That is very encouraging for us!

[shiva]

Okay... I have promised myself that this whole week I am not going to ask my daughter even one time how many kids were out sick in her class. That is my goal this week I don't know why I sometimes go looking for trouble. My therapist says that if you go looking for crabapples you're going to find crabapples. I am really going to try hard to stop doing just that.