Worst Work Day Ever! (Pretty Funny, If You're Not Me...)

[asianeko]

As many of you know, I'm a dog groomer. I completely love my job, but some days you just wonder why in the hell you got out of bed. Today was one of those days.

My shift started at 12:30. First dog of the day, a GIANT St. Bernard. He's a sweetie, but he has trouble standing since he has bad joints. He's also very sensitive about his feet being touched. Just brushing him out and trimming his tummy threw out my back. 1 point for the handsome Bernard.

So I get him in the back into the bath, and I get covered in drool and soaked with water and shampoo. This is actually normal. What isn't normal is how much he hates the dryer. Now, keep in mind that a St Bernard is a very large, very fluffy dog. Now imagine drying him with a giant blow dryer when he's scared of the sound. Now imagine the person drying him hobbling around like Quasimodo. 2 points for the St Bernard.

At this point he has to dry a bit in the kennel since I just can't do much else. I get some work done on my other pups, grab a bite to eat, take some meds for my back, and finally muster up the courage to tackle the gentle giant again. I get him on the table (I'm still miming a hunchback a bit) and start working on his feet, which are bigger than my hands. He decides to kick me in the face. 3 points for said gentle giant.

He's nearly done, so I keep on trucking, now hobbling like an idiot and having a massive headache. I finish trimming up his tail and his tush, and all in all he's looking pretty handsome! As I finish trimming near his hind foot, I hear this sound, this horrid sound that could be a sneeze. It wasn't a sneeze. It was the biggest St Bernard shart I have ever seen. This sweet creature just had explosive diarrhea all over the wall, the table, and (mostly) my back. 4 points for the lovable pup.

I just about died. Thank goodness I was able to change my smock and wash my arms. At that point he was finished so we called his parents and he went on his merry way. My amazing boyfriend took good care of me when I got home. He had a hot shower ready, some ice and biofreeze for my back, and a tall glass of hard cider.

I just had to share this with you all, thought some of you may get a good chuckle.

[laitka]

Part of me is horrified for you but another part is giggling! I am totally picturing a shameful Bernard with his tail between his legs! Poor pup. Lucky your boyfriend was there for some post trauma TLC

[asianeko]

Yeah hahaha. It's something that's just part of the job. I'm used to getting pooped on but not like that! He wasn't shameful at all either, he probably felt way better! His tail was wagging and he had a big ol doofy grin on those drooly jowls.

[Erica1649]

O man...what a day to say the least...I hope you got a generous tip when you were done...the kick in the face was enough, but he hadda add insult to injury by sharting on you amongst other things...but he's lucky he was cute...lol

[paulinek]

OMG! I thought being a dog grpomer would be such a nice job, bit like being a hairdresser but without gaving to make boring small talk to people about where they're going on holiday this year and stuff but I am now seeing it in a whole different light!!! Getting diarrhoea'd on by a dog is just yukky beyond words, it's just as well you didn't have your face down there I suppose and at least he didn't need washing all over again either lol. Hope the rest of your day is better although by the sound of it, that won't be hard! xx

[asianeko]

You'd think, Erica! I'm not one to expect a tip, it's nice when I get it. However there was no tip from this pup. Granted, they were already paying over $100 for him to get his bat hand haircut, so I really can't blame them.

Paulinek, it really is a nice job! I get puppy kisses and snuggles and affection! It just has it's poo showers and biting moments as well! Most of the time getting pooped on is little pellets from a creature the size of a cat. This is the first time in 4 years I had to throw away a smock hahaha.

[sage]

Omg! At least he didn't crap all over himself while drying in the crate. Then you'd have had to start all over again!

[lizzo]

Oh no! I can't believe you got pooped on! Is that a common occurrence?

*Note to self, do not read while eating breakfast, my granola looks less appetizing now, lol*

[asianeko]

Sage, I completely agree! He did manage to do it again while in his crate, and STILL not get any on him! He is the master of poops, let me tell you!

Lizzo, Getting pooped on is pretty common but it's usually teeny little poops from shih tzus and such. This is the first time in all my grooming that I've been pooped on like that by a dog. It's not horribly uncommon for some dogs to get stressed and have diarrhea, but usually you have a bit of warning. This was literally BAM!

[erinn23]

You have a positive attitude for being a s***ty day

[asianeko]

What can I say, I'm a hopeless optimist! Right after it happened I actually went on my lunch break to just sit and relax for a bit. Yeah, I ate too haha. It could have been way worse! At least it didn't get in my hair or on my face!