making progress!

[livepink]

* may be graphic for some

So, my job as a CNA and all the glorious bodily fluids it involves used to sent me into a full blown panic attack on the daily. But, I really really need this job so I had no choice but to get thicker skin. Some things have happened and I've surprised myself how they played out!

- One morning I had a resident refuse her breakfast but didn't think anything of it and when I went back in after to get her dressed I saw a basin flipped over on her bed and she told me she wasn't getting dressed as she just vomited but needed her sheets changed cause she was sick on them. I don't know why I didn't panic or anything, I just stripped the bed and cleaned her up as some was on her and that was that. I NEVER thought that day would come.

-We had a lady who is very unwell alot, on hospis etc who was in the dining room to have her lunch and she kept making strange sounds and calling for a nurse. I kept asking her what was wrong but she would just shake her head. I left the dining room and no more than 2 minutes after another aide was wheeling her out telling me she had just vomited on the floor. I went in and looked, most of it was covered but a good portion wasn't. I just stared at it and thought to myself "ew" but I couldn't clean it because there was SO much. and *GRAPHIC* it was still warm, ya know? I can empty basins and all that but to be on my hands and knees that close I couldn't handle. but I held the bags for who touched it and wasn't "afraid" of it, just grossed out.

- this morning I walked into the same lady's room as scenario one and was going to pull her up in the bed for breakfast when I noticed her basin next to her bed full of vomit. I was like did you get sick? and she's like yeah a little while ago. I was more shocked why she didn't ring for help! to get some mouthwash or to have some ginger ale! anyways, I just emptied the basin and that was that.

-THEN yet again today, I was taking care of a man getting him dressed in bed and I asked him if he was ready to get up and he said "NO I'M GOING TO THROW UP GIVE ME A BUCKET." so, trying to make him laugh a little I was like "Oh no! You hold that in there! Deep breaths! Let me get the bucket!" just being silly while I was getting the basin for him then I put it on his lap and just stood there. WHEN IN MY LIFE WOULD I HAVE EVER STOOD THERE?! i asked him after a few minutes how he was feeling and he repeated I'm going to throw up, It's coming. I told him to ring when he had and I'd clean him up. Luckily, he was probably just hungry because he got up a little later and had some lunch and was fine.

I can't believe all this has happened and I haven't had a mental breakdown yet! This just shows that anyone can work and make little progress steps to getting better with their fear I never EVER thought I'd be able to do any of that! I know when the noro bug hits this coming winter like it does EVERY year and we go quarantined and all that fun stuff I'll be a wreck because it's utter chaos and it seems everyone catches it, but that's a good amount of time away and that's all the more time to get prepared. Thank you to anyone who read this, just wanted to show people it is possible to work through it! Not saying I'm cured by any means at all, just learned how to cope with different situations, I suppose!

[out_of_order]

Wow you're doing so well! Sounds like your job is desensitizing you. Thank God there are people like you who CAN do that kind of work - I never could - not even if I wasn't emet.

[julybabe]

OMG that's some amazing stuff there is no way I could cope with that! I've managed to cope with my children v* when they were little but it was not easy, but even though i would be there shaking like a leaf, I would not let it stop me being there for them, I could not do your job tho no way, WELL DONE YOU !!!

[herbal]

Great work!

[Erica1649]

This is great to hear! I couldn't work in a place like that because of vomiting!!! You couldn't pay me enough!! The old man who got sick in our waiting room was enough for me for a while!!!

I know what you mean about the "eww gross" thing about a puddle on the floor, when I see that its one of those you feel squamish for a while, then it passes....o yeah and major ick on it still being warm hahah groooooossss!!! *shudders*

Great job again!!

[transcend6887]

Wow! Thats great to hear. Not gonna lie though, I did feel a bit anxious when you mentioned the guy talking about getting ready to get sick. It's so weird cause when I was last sick like that I eventually gave up trying to hold back and handled it (not extremely well but I didn't die and afterwards I was like that wasn't as bad as it seemed before but still the fear stuck with me. I definitely couldn't do your job but it just shows that the more you put yourself out there, the most likely the fear loses it's control.