I need to vent

[jess0930]

My husband and I got to church every Sunday. It is very important to us to go. The church we go to is the church that my dads is the preacher of. Well of course with all the sicknesses going around church can be one of the easiest ways to get sick. My husband and I have had our own church services for the past month or so trying to stay away from it all. Until yesterday. We decided we should go and it was also our sons baby dedication. There is a cry room (our church is not a very big one) So my husband and I go and sit in there with our son so we can listen to the service and also stay away from everyone. Well so we thought.... One by one people started crowding into this tiny cry room to say high and give us hugs and say hi to our baby.... Then some people didnt even end up leaving! They know we go in there for a reason but who cares lets go crowd them anyways. I am more irritated then paranoid. I am also pregnant with our second. Our 6 month old was born 6 weeks early. I am not a very big person and actually underweight due to being sick a few months back. The last thing I need right now is to get sick. I am a very high risk pregnancy and if I get a stomach virus or the influenza crud I am in big danger for dehydration, which could mean losing the baby or having another premie which I would rather not go through that again. It was very hard. I just wish people would respect our wishes. People are over here touching my sons hands and face and hair and it drives me nuts. My dad has even made a few announcements at church to try not to touch our son. especially when he was first born. (he does have some health problems) But for some reason they dont listen. Sorry to vent on here but part of my irritation is from my emet and trying to keep my family healthy right now. It is very critical. I have already had a few little scares with this pregnancy and I cant put myself at risk for anything else. Ugh.

[Grace47]

Ugh! That drove me nuts, too. It's only common sense you don't touch a baby unless the parents say okay.

[jess0930]

Ugh! That drove me nuts, too. It's only common sense you don't touch a baby unless the parents say okay.

Exactly! Sometimes I think that the people at our church feel they have a right since my dad is the pastor and because its a small church its very tight and everyone knows everyone. Still drives me crazy.

[sdd]

I have a baby also and I have noticed that people are just CLUELESS when it comes to babies lately. People will come up to my son in the store and touch his hands and cheeks! It is SO aggravating! I mean, I don't want people I know touching all over him during this season and I especially don't want strangers doing it! Vent away...people are driving me nuts with the touching too!

[jess0930]

I have a baby also and I have noticed that people are just CLUELESS when it comes to babies lately. People will come up to my son in the store and touch his hands and cheeks! It is SO aggravating! I mean, I don't want people I know touching all over him during this season and I especially don't want strangers doing it! Vent away...people are driving me nuts with the touching too!

Oh my gosh I have had the same thing happen too! I dont get why people think it is okay to just come up to a random strnger and touch their kid. especially in the winter season when everyone is sick. It drives me nuts. And tonight I am starting to notice my son has a runny nose and has been screaming all day... My inlaws had a cold and my sons great grandpa had a cold and when we went to visit was coughing all over him. Ugh... Now I am especially irritated. No one understands but other mothers... we are the ones that take care of the child full time. whether its a cold a sv* or anything else its frustrating cause when they are babies, its so much harder to control the germs and so on top of it usually mom gets sick...

[christianne]

I can understand your irritation and frustration....but on the other hand it sounds like everyone was just being friendly and didn't mean to come across as intrusive. If people are touching your baby and you are uncomfortable with that you should say so....or when my son was small I politely asked them to either wash their hands or use hand sanitizer before doing holding him. I never liked it either when people would just touch or grab him. But you should never be shy about speaking up when it comes to your baby. They will understand.
Now...is this "cry room" a place for ONLY you and your family? Then I can understand why you're upset. But if it is a public area than it is a bit unfair to expect everyone else to stay out. Bottom line...I'm sure they mean well and probably just wanted to check up on how you and your baby are doing. Which is a very nice thing....I think.

[jess0930]

I can understand your irritation and frustration....but on the other hand it sounds like everyone was just being friendly and didn't mean to come across as intrusive. If people are touching your baby and you are uncomfortable with that you should say so....or when my son was small I politely asked them to either wash their hands or use hand sanitizer before doing holding him. I never liked it either when people would just touch or grab him. But you should never be shy about speaking up when it comes to your baby. They will understand.
Now...is this "cry room" a place for ONLY you and your family? Then I can understand why you're upset. But if it is a public area than it is a bit unfair to expect everyone else to stay out. Bottom line...I'm sure they mean well and probably just wanted to check up on how you and your baby are doing. Which is a very nice thing....I think.

The room isnt specifically for my husband and I but it is supposed to be a private room where moms can breastfeed or put their child to sleep when needed. My husband my dad my mom and I always say stuff and tell people not to touch or to wash there hands and sanitize. Thats why I am frustrated cause they dont listen. its also a place where you can quietly listen to the sermon. Not in our case. They come back to talk and this last sunday there were like 5 people in the tiny room at one time. Adults not children. So I didnt get to here the service either.

[Grace47]

My children were full term and had no health problems and I still would hate what you're describing. If I had a premie, I think I might have gone ballistic. I don't know how you kept your cool. They know your baby's state of health and the struggles he's been through and still touch him, etc - I probably would have lost my cool - especially if I was also pregnant.

[Maige]

Cripes, I'm far too young to have a kid but I can understand why you're angry - I always found it so strange that people get these impulses to touch babies around them, especially when they could so easily be susceptible to whatever's on the hands of those nosy parkers. I'd ask your husband to perhaps make a much more pronounced, firm statement of not touching your kid...or you making said statement.