Hi, I'm new...my story and could be triggering
My name is Taylor and I am a man who has been terrified of being sick since I was 10 years old. I was with my neighbors and it was winter in Illinois. I was bundled up in a coat in the backseat of the car and the heat was on high. We went to the grocery store and I got Starburst candy and a free pizza sample while there. On the way home I started feeling overheated in my coat and a little car sick. Once we got back to the neighbors house I tried my hardest to get out of the car fast and wanted into the house NOW!! My friend's mother had no idea why I was screaming for her to unlock the door as she struggled with groceries and I stood on the porch with my stomach swirling. Eventually, I put both hands over my mouth and it just came up and out and down my sleeves into my coat. It covered her porch. She got a few gallons of water to clean the porch and I ran into her bathroom where I did it again in her toilet. I remember her washer and dryer were in the bathroom and it smelled strongly of Snuggle fabric softener in the room and to this day I cannot stand the smell of that stuff. I then walked home and told my parents what had happened. My father (who was horribly abusive my whole life) made my mother make toast and pretty much force fed me. I got one bite down and ran into our bathroom and got sick again. I have no idea why that changed my life but it did. I have never known there was a actual name for my phobia and others had it too until I Googled it today some 20 years later. To this day when I get a stomach ache I will lay flat on my back and do breathing exercises with my eyes closed....anything to keep from getting sick. I have only ever done this again a handful of times in over 20 years. That experience at my friend's changed my life in the fact that I NEVER again, ate food samples from the grocery store. I never ate Starburst again. I never sat in the backseat of a car. I always tell people the back seat makes me car sick. When I feel even the slightest bit overheated (and now living in Florida that happens a lot) I must strip if at home to just boxers and turn a fann directly on me even if the air conditioning is on. if I am out in a car I am the one driving so I turn my air on high blasting me in the face. I do not use fabric softener on my laundry. I never ever at dinner at anyone's house other than my own parents ever again. Even now as an adult I do not trust food that is not prepared by me. I have not ever told this story and it feels good to let it out. I wonder how many of you have similar stories. Thanks for letting me share. Taylor
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