New to the forums ;)

[norrok]

Howdy,


it sure is a great feeling to know there are people just like you out there, with the same type of problem (emetophobia), and going through the same s***.


just going to introduce my self real fast :P (its 4:05am, woke up 3 hours ago [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]) so mind the spelling / grama mistakes [img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img]


It all started at the age of seven, i was well known and got along with all the other kids in school, and alas - was the first kid to go on a date in class [img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img]- sadly, thats where the problem started, on the second date with her, i was feeling rather ill in the morning, and my mother told me i should stay home, but i disagreed (i would have prefered to be with the girl at the time instead of laying in bed sick), so out i went, going towards the end of the date, we went to her house and played some super nintento, and i started feeling sick again - and asked to be taken home, she was bugging me all the way in the car, and i was like "rawwr, leave me alone" - and just as the car stoped outside my house, i V" (looks like the V" is a nice way to put it on the forums ) all over the back seat (and all over her [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img])


life kinda went down hill from there, she made a joke out of it, and i got alot of s*** from my "friends" at the time -


so to do a quicky time line


7 - emetophobia starts.


10 - emetophobia gets worse, was a party at my house (leaving party, moving to the usa at the time), and one of my sisters friends was ill (she sure made a mess that night [img]smileys/smilies_12.gif[/img])


from about 10 to 15 i barely had it, i guess the hot weather in florida helped the issue and make me feel better, compare to the cold rain land called england :P


at 15 and a half we moved back to england, and the fear started again -


started with a case of depresion due to me being unable to get into high school and make friends of my age group (due to half a year being left in school), due to this issue i spent 2 years of my life being depressed playing online computer games, having no interaction with people my age in an age group that shouldnt have been missed, having emetophobia (scared to death of V"ing, and always told my self i'd prefer to die over being ill).


after the two years of hell passed, i talked to a counciler over the phone, and we came up with a program to get me out the house, and back into the world, first few months of it was hell, but i finally managed to get back into life and emetophobia became rare again, i got a few jobs, earned some cash - life was looking rather good at the time.


then i went to college to do my GCSE's (basic form of education gained in highschool/secondary school), but alas - social life got in the way of my goals, and i started doing drugs / drinking and smoking, my term of college ended about half a year later when i broke up with my current girl friend due to a rather serious fight, that resulted in one of us having to leave college (Seeing as both of us was in the same class), and alas - the depression returned.


at its worse point now, for a year i've played online computer games, trying to seek a social life though the internet, everytime i had to much to eat, not enough sleep, even a simple burp could set off the fear", lifes kinda gone on like that, im 18 now - got a part time job, looking for a full time - but emetophobia is screwing me over, im constnatly feeling ill at work, im having a lack of sleep due to waking up shivering / headaches / ect. (ill be lucky if i sleep for 4 hours a night, after spending 3-5 hours laying in bed trying to get to sleep.


so today / tonight - i wake up, and do some interenet searching, just to see what the hell has been wrong with me for so long - after an hour of searching, emetophobia finally catched my eye - doing some forum searchs, checking out side

[bexcelica]

Hey, I just wanted you to knwo that I'm always here if you need to talk.



I dont know about the chewing gum, im not a fan of gum.

if you go to a psychiatirst or a psychollogist im sure they wil be wble
to help you. there are a lot of phobia treatment programs around. i was
actually talking to my boyfriends mom about it the other day - she had
a phobia of taking tests to the point of where she would shake so bad
she woul dhave to hol dher hand with her other hand. she said rapid eye
movement therapy or something like that made it so much better for her.
i think im going to try it with emet. so if you find a doc that knows
about emet, talk to them they would know more than me. i know a lot of
us are on some sort of meds, for anxiety or depression, or even just a
pill to take when we start to freak out. i take ativan when i get
anxiety and it really calms me down. you should look into that.
although i think its better to solve the thinking rather than mask it
with drugs. either way that helps though, go for it.



I think it is common for people to think that being dead would be
better than v*. im sure youre not alone with that. the last time i got
sick, right before i told my mom i wish i was dead instead of feeling
like i was feeling. i know you say you delay suicide.. please dont do
that! things will get better, but they wont unless you try to make them
better. if you thnk about it, suicide is a permanent solution to
a temporary problem (yes i read it off a poster but it really stuck
with me) so think about that, things will get beter. i know it is
hard to not think about suicide, but thats something you could talk to
a dr about, if you decide to go to one.



what do you mean attempting self harm? do you mean somethign liek
cutting? i never admitted it before, but i cut myself a few times, a
couple years ago... it never got beyond that. i realized it
doesnt make things better, it only makes things worse.



luckily, i have parents that undersatnd my problem, so i dont know what
its like to have your family say things liek they do to you. im sure
its not uncommon for people to think its stupid that your afraid of v*.
i have a freind, who i posted about a while back, who ive been friends
with since we were 5 (im 21 now) and i told her for thr first time and
she told me that its all in your head, she has real problems. but
youknow what my boyfriend told me, if it affects you it IS a real
problem. so between him and my parents, i have a lot of support. if you
dont have that, we are all here for support because we all know what
you are going through and we all have been there.



i hope i answered some of your questions, and welcome to the site. i
think youll find it very helpful, i know i have and im sure many others
have found it helpful also. if you need anything private message me or
aim bexcelica.



becky

[norrok]

Thanks for the awesome reply Bex [img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img]


to start with the self harm thing, i dunno - somethings i just feel down, and got nothing to vent how i feel on, and the closest thing to take it out on is my self - im not to much into cutting, but i found a lightercan do the trick.. and now - as i look at my arms and hands .. god i was stupid to have even considered it .. bah (nothing serious if ya worried) [img]smileys/smilies_11.gif[/img]


indeed, on the doc thing, im going to make an apointment today, and try and have it for tomorrow (i start work again saturday), would be nice if they know anything on this issue - so sick of this s*** - if meds mask it for some time, ill live - i just wanna feel like a normal person again [img]smileys/smilies_12.gif[/img]


and yea - your right, suicide is not the answer.. i prob wouldnt have the balls to do it anyways - just the way i feel sometimes, would be nice to just give in.. even if the idea's shrugged off in a few hours. [img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]


and finally, the chewing gum, Hmmmm, wonder if its oki to ask someone that might know about it that i've not talked to for years [img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img]

[peachfeet]

I agree with Bex.


I've never once told myself I wish I were dead, I wish someone would kill me, or anything to that degree when I've been sick. Why sacrifice friendship, family, your life, just because you're going to vomit which only takes a couple ofminutes? Seconds, even.Honestly, suicide is without a doubt the lowest form to self-pity and resolution there could be. I'm not judging you - I used to be suicidal but not because of Emet, but because of emotional abuse and rejection I had to go through for several years with my mother. But that got quickly resolved with medication, and she got better.


I've never done self-arm - I just never saw the point, and never saw how that was to cure my problems or even mask it temporarily. If I were you I would cease that act immediately. It will do nothing but leave horrid scars and painful memories. Try discussing that with your psychologist or doctor; they will recommend a more less painful way of treatment to overcome your hardship.


Are you on any medication?


I can share the online gaming experience with you. I did that for a year, and my education went horribly neglected. Thankfully I got out of that cyclone. Those games are just so damn addicting! Anyhow, it is a relief to know that you're not the only one sharing the fear of something that in other people's eyes is considered miniscule and no big deal. Welcome to the site!

[kate1966]

Hi and welcome to the site....hope you will find great comfort here.....i have...and you will get lots of support and gain alot of friends......Kate

[norrok]

I agree with Bex.


I've never once told myself I wish I were dead, I wish someone would kill me, or anything to that degree when I've been sick. Why sacrifice friendship, family, your life, just because you're going to vomit which only takes a couple ofminutes? Seconds, even.Honestly, suicide is without a doubt the lowest form to self-pity and resolution there could be. I'm not judging you - I used to be suicidal but not because of Emet, but because of emotional abuse and rejection I had to go through for several years with my mother. But that got quickly resolved with medication, and she got better.


I've never done self-arm - I just never saw the point, and never saw how that was to cure my problems or even mask it temporarily. If I were you I would cease that act immediately. It will do nothing but leave horrid scars and painful memories. Try discussing that with your psychologist or doctor; they will recommend a more less painful way of treatment to overcome your hardship.


Are you on any medication?


I can share the online gaming experience with you. I did that for a year, and my education went horribly neglected. Thankfully I got out of that cyclone. Those games are just so damn addicting! Anyhow, it is a relief to know that you're not the only one sharing the fear of something that in other people's eyes is considered miniscule and no big deal. Welcome to the site!

nope, not on any medication yet - im going to the doctors on tuesday though (i had no idea what the heck emet was called for many years, so didnt know if it was a phobia, or i was just strange :P


and indeed, i never asked anyone to kill me, but in them times of "you know your going to v"', you just like saying it - even though most of the time you dont seem to, because you panic so much about not :P


and about self harm, emet is not really my reason for it, its mixed in with alot of other things, i've not had the best child hood lets say :P


anyways, thanks for the welcome guys

[tcsarah]

Hi there, welcome to the group! What a horrible experience you had with being ill when you were seven no wonder you became phobic after that.


I'm glad you are going to see your doctor, this is the first step to improving things in your life. Tell him/her everything in as much detail as possible, so they know exactly how you feel and are suffering. S/he may prescribe you a course of anti-depressants (I have been on anti-depressants for many years and I swear they have literally saved my life) or anti-anxiety drugs. Your doctor will also probably refer you to a therapist such as a psychologist. Doctors are, in general, very understanding, but if you do come across one that seems to not take your problems seriously enough, change doctors (with every profession there willl be good and bad!). I saw a different doctor to my usualabout ten years ago, who told me at 25 I should think about starting a family and if I had a baby to worry about I would not be so concerned with trivial things such as v*ing in public! What utter tosh, putting it politely. Needless to say I never saw that doctor again - he knew absolutley nothing about mental health! I really could have slapped him!


I personally found much relieffrom my emetophobia by talking about it with a good friend. There willl always be people out there ready to mock things they don't understand or haven't been through themselves. I'm so sorry your family have been like this with you. If you don't have a good friend or relative you can confide in, all in not lost as you always have us here at the group to offer you support and advice. I can't telll you how much it has helped me being able to discuss things with other emets, who understand exactly what you have to go through each day.


Please let us know how your doctor's visit goes. Try and keep your chin up, I promise you things willl get better [img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]


Tracey x

[sunshine16]

Awe Welcome to our lil emety family

Also, there is a sticky thread up there that says Who Are You? Its' a
great place to get to know everyone, and may I suggust you copy and
paste your starter thread to there?

Anyways, you sound a lot like me, and I'm not gonna introduce myself
greatly because well, that can be found in the Who Are You area...

I really hope that you find all the support you need here, and comfort
in knowing that no matter what you are not alone. Be it triumphs or
pitfalls, these wonderful people are here to help you deal with what I
consider the worst phobia, and give you a shoulder to lean on. I myself
rememeber well the day I found this site, and the hope that it renewed
in me. I hope it does the same for you.

Always here for you,

Laura</font>

[crazy_me_84]

Welcome!


No doubtyou will find great support here! I certainly have! I understand how you might feel about suicide. I've had the verysame feelings. Sometimes it might feel easier to give in, but it isn't. Anyway, best of luck in finding the right doctor!

[SimplyMe]

Welcome to the site! I'm glad you have a therapist to help you even if emetophobia isn't commonly known you can at elast maybe be taught to cope w/ it until you find a therapist who has heard of it. Good luck! Look forward to your posting here!

[crystalmom]

Welcome! I'm pretty new here too, and I was so happy to see there was a name for this phobia! And other people have it too!


I'm 28, and have had this phobia since I was 2. The actual panic attacks started for me at 18, and depression and agoraphobia (not leaving the house, or socializing) also hit at that time. I started taking anti-depressants at 19, and I still take them. Although they have changed in form and doasage through the years, I am thankful to have them. My b/f thinks that it's all mind over matter, and I disagree, and will not go off these pills until I am ready. When that may be, I don't know.


Explain to your doc everything...symptoms in a panic attack, and depression. Let them guide you, but overall you are the judge. I was sent to one psychologist, and I knew more than he did about panic disorder. Small town!


Anyway, as for thinking about death...that comes with the depression I think. I had a perfect (more or less) childhood, and it still has effected me. I wanted death at such a young age, and am now so thankful that I was never really going to do it, although the thoughts were there.


Let us know how everything goes. Everyone here is amazing, and you will find alot of support here.


Crystal

[norrok]

Thanks for the welcomes guys


already feel at home :P


trust me, ill go into full detail with how i feel with the doc, but knowing my luck - he wont have any idea what the hell im talking about [img]smileys/smilies_12.gif[/img]


anyways, talk more in a few days, have fun and keep well