I'm currently having an attack and you've probably seen my posts all night so i apologise for that, I'm writing this to take my mind off it, i'm sorry if it's a it long winded!

I am supposed to be going to university in September, it's about an hour and a half away from my home and i would be sharing a flat. I've posted on here before all the worries that brings! After a few months of improvment with my emet i now find myself back down again, taking time off college, not eating, staying in bed etc and i honestly don't know if i will be able to cope in university, living on my own! Thing is, i have always wanted to go to university for the experience and i don't want my emet to get in the way (i want to be able to get drunk on freshers week without worring haha!) but at the moment it takes a lot of support and persuasion from my parents for me to do anything and i can only really manage one social event a week let alone every night!

So this feels like my only other option and my question is does it sound sensible or stupid?

I am seriously considering deferring my place until next year, so basically i'd be taking a year off and then taking up my place in September 2014! I thought i could use the year to truly kick emets arse and do some things i've wanted to do for a long time (travelling etc) then by the time next September comes i'll be ready to go to uni and have an amazing time!

My mum thinks it would be better if i just go for it and go this September but i worry that may ruin my experience because i'll be constantly freaking out! Does anybody have any suggestions on what you think i should do? I am sorry this was so long and i'm so sorry about how much i am posting lately, i just hope i'm not annoying everyone