How are you supposed to know "it" will happen?

[vballxlauren1014]

Okay! I have been posting here a lot lately. And maybe this question has been asked in the past, but this has been on my mind a lot lately...

1. I think one of the main reasons why I have such anxiety about this is because I have no idea what you "feel" like before you're actually about to throw up. I remember the last time I threw up. It was awful, but I still can't remember the exact feelings I had moments before I threw up, and it freaks me out that I don't know how to identify it. Can anyone relate or help me out here? I know people say their mouth will water or something, but mine does that sometimes even when I feel fine. So I'm not so sure that's a for sure sign I can rely on.

2. I am planning on getting therapy soon. I talked to my PCP about this phobia, and of course he doesn't understand why I fear something as silly as throwing up, but I dont expect him too, really. I don't expect anyone too. But he gave me the number to an office of about 30 different therapists for different anxiety disorders. So hopefully I can find one that suits me. But I am so weird, I am worried about one thing for some reason...WHAT IF MY THERAPIST GETS THE STOMACH FLU? What if she cancels an appt with me because she is sick, or doesn't cancel an appt a few days after being sick because she doesn't want to freak me out by telling me? I worry about this...I just can't believe I even worry about this but I do

[mdgirl1977]

for everyone it is slightly different but I guess most people say they get hot flush, dizzy, water mouth, esophagus lurching, stomach lurches up. you basically can't do anything except lean over and...well, you know. it usually happens pretty fast like "uh oh...run..."

chances of your therapist seeing you when he gets the sv are slim. just like most professionals, they don't want to expose patients with anxiety, germaphobia, etc. that is your anxiety speaking.

[Chibinarwhal]

The mouth watering thing is really hard to explain... It really isn't like your mouth watering like normal. It's like... REALLY watery and it feels disgusting and... I'm just gonna stop there ahaha. And really, whenever it happens to me I KNOW. It is really easy to know the real thing vs. anxiety for me anyways, like when it's the real thing it's just... Ew.

I have a therapist! And it's a child/family therapist too, which was a REALLY big step for me, especially since in the same tiny office there's another therapist and a social worker. My therapist? Never gets sick. Her immune system is amazing, and since I'm in treatment for germaphobia I've touched MANY door handles and common surfaces in the office for exposure therapy and I've been amazingly fine But anyways, you really shouldn't worry. mdgirl is definitely right on that one.

[Hannah A.]

To answer your first question: I don't know.. its weird. Last time I got sick (last year) I honestly thought it was anxiety at first. I get nausea from anxiety frequently. But turns out I was actually sick... Anyways, I don't really remember salivating much before it but again, it was last year. I remember being INSANELY nauseous, not anxiety nausea, but really bad I'm-gonna-be-sick-NOW nausea. Then I kinda just gagged and it happened. But I wasn't dizzy, hot, or salivating all that much. It was just weird.

[gumdropper1]

Vball, please read my Vomiting FAQ to learn more about this miserable experience: http://emetophobia.byethost15.com/vomiting.html

Doug

[Syrup]

It's not fun, but certainly NOT the worse thing in the world. When you're going to v*, you know it, just like when you know you have to run to the bathroom to have d*. The feeling isn't the same, n* is worse, but like I said EVERYONE on the planet has done it at one point or another and you move on. There are tons of unpleasant experiences in life, so try not to focus on this one. If someday you need to v*, you'll know it, and you'll deal with it. Enjoy today! I doubt it's going to happen any time soon. (((HUGS)))

[vballxlauren1014]

Wow thank you all so much for your replies! I think the bad thing about this for me, is now that I know that watery mouth is a symptom before you get sick, I will actually think my mouth is watering when I don't feel well (which is a lot) and the more I think about it the worse it gets. I don't know, makes me feel gross just thinking about it. I wish there was a way to 100% avoid it altogether I know everyone does it sometimes but I just don't want too!!! Ugh it's so hard. Thanks for the support. The last time I actually got sick, I did know about 10 seconds before it happened...somehow my body just knew and I ran to the bathroom. At that point in my life I wouldn't have considered myself emetophobic though, so I am assuming the next experience will be a lot different for me since I will probably be so panicked and nervous and just feel awful did you guys feel like your experience getting sick made you feel any better or help your fear, or did it just stay the same, or even get worse? Some people tell me "you probably just need to throw up and then you'll be fine" and I just don't see how that could be the solution..especially since when I feel good I have all negative thoughts wrapped around it anyways. And about the therapist thing, I think I just need to schedule the appointment and get on the ball with this. I need to stop worrying about dumb scenarios that are out of my control!! I am so frustrated with myself lately. But thanks so much for the responses you guys! You're awesome!

[NicManri]

Last time v* I wasn't really emet. V* will not necessarily help with this phobia, for some people it might but for others it can just make it worse

[emmalawrence81]

Im the same. I dont know when I'm going to v*. I've not even made it to bathroom before cos I just didn't know. Think this is the biggest part of my phobia the not knowing when or if its going to happen especially if out in public and I don't have any warnings.

[cat1]

It's been so long since last time that I don't remember clearly omg. (trigger warning) First I felt really hot and shaky and just "weird" like I had my stomach in my chest and then it just got worse until it ..Well, came out! Afterwards I felt much less n* and it's relieving to know that at least it's probably a long time until next time (the only pleasant part hahaha)

[NaiveAndTrue]

The n* I get is the same, except for those last 20 or so seconds where you know it's DEFINITELY going to happen. It's pure instinct - you just KNOW. I've had once where I felt completely fine and suddenly got hit with a flush the the DEFINITELY feeling - luckily I was already in the bathroom, and only gagged 2 or 3 times. Nothing has come up or out since middle school, and then it was very little. I think the last time I v*ed more than a half teaspoon or so was before I was emet, maybe 3rd or 4th grade? For years I would fight it by swallowing over and over and even drinking water. Now if I get close my throat closes up and I'll swallow uncontrollably. It's half comforting to feel like I can 'stop it', but it's hours of fighting and I know it would be easier if I could just 'get it over with', but when I get close the terror absolutely blinds me.

[NicManri]

The n* I get is the same, except for those last 20 or so seconds where you know it's DEFINITELY going to happen. It's pure instinct - you just KNOW. I've had once where I felt completely fine and suddenly got hit with a flush the the DEFINITELY feeling - luckily I was already in the bathroom, and only gagged 2 or 3 times. Nothing has come up or out since middle school, and then it was very little. I think the last time I v*ed more than a half teaspoon or so was before I was emet, maybe 3rd or 4th grade? For years I would fight it by swallowing over and over and even drinking water. Now if I get close my throat closes up and I'll swallow uncontrollably. It's half comforting to feel like I can 'stop it', but it's hours of fighting and I know it would be easier if I could just 'get it over with', but when I get close the terror absolutely blinds me.

same here, when I'm feeling ok I sometimes wish I could just do it and get it over with but as soon as I feel n* I panic