Exposure Therapy

[gummynarf06]

I've been seeking treatment for this since maybe August? I think that's it. When I started with my therapist, who specializes in phobias we started with my watching You Tube videos with the sound off. I started very light- toddlers puking, children, teens, grown ups. I watched these and was supposed to be aware of how anxious I felt watching them. Oddly enough, I wasn't really more than a 4/10 and quickly neutralized to a 0. Next we decided on sound, because that really seems to be one of the things that really bothers me about the whole thing. So first I did coughing, (a lot of whooping cough videos) then gagging, and retching (oddly enough these often came in the form of men changing diapers) and I became pretty neutral to that- there were even some "surprise pukes" with some of those. Then...then we decided to face the "monster" as it were, and I started revisiting the old videos with the sound. A lot of these were full of hysterical laughing because most of them featured very drunk people. I found that those neutralized pretty fast because, well, frankly they WERE kind of funny. So I told this to my therapist and she suggested finding some that weren't so funny. I found them in the form of people for whatever reason videoing themselves being sick from stomach flu. Those made me anxious for awhile....but now they don't. I still watch them every night, but I'm pretty numb to them now.

My question is now, where do I go from here? I'm still anxious about "what will be/what could be" so part of me feels like this has all been in vain, because I'm still asking my daughter multiple times a day if she feels okay if she's the least bit too quiet. I've asked my son, my husband...I still get a stab of anxiety when I read FB posts about friends and their kids getting "the bug". What do I do now? The videos are really not doing much... I mean, I'm a nurse and I work in postpartum, we get pukers sometimes, especially if they reacted bad to an epidural or had a c-section. It would be really weird though to ask them to give me the pukers because that's so unpredictable. I could ask to spend time in PACU (post anesthesia care unit) but again, I'd be subject to answering "um, why?" Has anyone else gotten to this point? I'm not ready to face it for realsies here in my home, I need more time, what should I do here?

[canonguy]

honestly i don't think exposure therapy works for most meets because our issue isn't v* at all... it's feeling out of control and having screwed up thought patterns. i think working on those and developing an internal locus of control is key. i know of people who have gotten worse with exposure therapy... you should probably look into CBT or the thrive book first. not trying to tell you what to do, just from some of my personal experiences

[mdgirl1977]

exactly what canon guy said. exposure isn't the issue. lack of control is. no exposure addresses that.

[Dairyfreelife]

You need CBT and exposure. I am glad you have gotten better with seeing it on TV. That is an improvement and I am glad for you. Because exposure is good. I have found it helpful but it does not address the anxious thoughts. I am going to disagree that emets should not do exposure. If there are external problems with emet, exposure is vital. The words, cartoons, hearing it, fake vomit from cartoons to fake vomit with real characters to seeing others vomit for real. It is the same as an phobia, be it needles, doctors, spiders, snakes, or vomit...start small and work your way up the external problem. And I know this is unpopular here, but I do think that some emets can be cured by vomiting themselves. Not everyone and not even most, but some. I would not because I have been sick multiple times since becoming emet at a very young age and it did nothing to help. I may have even briefly felt better and at times did feel that it was not bad and what was I worried about anyway...but it came right back. For most emets I think that is the case, but there a few that vomiting would be the best thing. Such as a trauma related to vomiting that caused their emet and they have not been sick since and getting sick again would likely make them see that it was not anything like that incident before. I do think that could cure some people. It is not that easy for most.
I do agree with canon and mdgirl though that exposure alone is often not enough for most emets. Because of the control thoughts and thoughts in general. CBT is good for this. I have gone from being unable to stop a panic attack because they happened so fast to now being able to slow them down. They will teach you a lot of techniques to get control of your anxiety and negative thoughts so you control yourself and you won't feel the need to ask your daughter or son or husband constantly if they feel okay.
It was not all in vain. You have addressed the external vomiting issue. Now you need to focus on addressing the internal issues related to vomit. I wish you luck and hope you soon become fully recovered.

[gummynarf06]

It's weird though, yeah I have control issues and it comes, or came out in the form of an eating disorder and compulsive excersize, but I've got it under control now (no pun intended). For me it really is just the sound, but if that's the case then why am I so anxious about the idea of anyone in my family, including myself vomiting? Ok, one exception is that I think I would be okay, actually with vomiting related to pregnancy. Exposure has to have done something good because I remember the trepidation in watching those videos for the first time without sound...it was like "eeeeee don't click play!" But I did it, and now I have a whole playlist of videos I just click on and...there we go. I don't think self induced vomit is for me- I don't think I'd be on board with that any more than I would be with setting my car on fire to rid me of a fear of fire. From a physical health standpoint I think it'd be more harm than good.

[mdgirl1977]

I don't think self induced vomit is for me- I don't think I'd be on board with that any more than I would be with setting my car on fire to rid me of a fear of fire. From a physical health standpoint I think it'd be more harm than good.

Best argument not to self induce that I have heard on here! And so true.

[Dairyfreelife]

It's weird though, yeah I have control issues and it comes, or came out in the form of an eating disorder and compulsive excersize, but I've got it under control now (no pun intended). For me it really is just the sound, but if that's the case then why am I so anxious about the idea of anyone in my family, including myself vomiting? Ok, one exception is that I think I would be okay, actually with vomiting related to pregnancy. Exposure has to have done something good because I remember the trepidation in watching those videos for the first time without sound...it was like "eeeeee don't click play!" But I did it, and now I have a whole playlist of videos I just click on and...there we go. I don't think self induced vomit is for me- I don't think I'd be on board with that any more than I would be with setting my car on fire to rid me of a fear of fire. From a physical health standpoint I think it'd be more harm than good.

Agree. Self induced vomiting is not for the majority of emets. Only a select few would be helped by it. I do think CBT would benefit you still. Exposure alone rarely ever cures a serious phobia.