Returning after 6 years :(

[embrace]

Hey all,

Last time I logged in was around 6 years ago and I felt on top of my phobia. But now it has returned . My emetaphobia mainly occurs when I have an event/situation that is new, or one where I know I don't have easy access to a toilet incase I need to V*. For example if I go to a restaraunt/cinema with someone, I start to panic incase I need to V*. That makes me feel really N* and I don't want to cause a scene/ruin the day for whoever I'm with.

Normally I just try to avoid situations but my sister is getting married next year and I'm already worrying about ruining her day
Please help!!

[Syrup]

The best thing that you can do is deal with it NOW! It's just starting the creep back in so nip it in the bud! Your sisters wedding is next year, that's PLENTY of time. Go to places where you aren't sure where the bathroom is and do some deep breathing. Ask yourself what would happen if you WERE to get ill. Look around you at the people, imagine them helping you, cheering for you (as odd as it sounds!), calming you, etc. whatever it is that helps you relax. If that's too much, bring music and headphones to listen to calming music as you do your exercise. Maybe for a minute at first and then extend it as often as you can until you can do it for a few hours without panicking.

I know we allow our minds to run to awful places when we're scared, but I PROMISE you if you were to get ill in public, not only would people feel bad, but you wouldn't be the first person that they vast majority would have seen vomit. I've seen it multiple times and it's never been a traumatic event for anyone around me. Everyone just feels bad for the person and moves on. You can do the same. Feel the anxiety, release it and move on.

[paulinek]

I used to have this exact same issue, still do to some extent but compared to how i was i have it a hundred times more under control. I had some CBT years ago and what the lady taught me was a huge turning point in dealing better with my emet. We would talk through particular scenarios that had happened and what i could have done to handle it better and would also talk about future scenarios that may possibly happen and put strategies in to place to deal with them should they ever occur.

My main dread - apart from vomiting of course - in social situations was having a panic attack, everyone knowing about it and me causing a massive embarrassing scene. What the CBT lady taught me, was that with the exception of prison, aircraft or being incapacitated in a hospital bed there are no situations in life where you cannot discreetly leave without causing a scene. She gave me all sorts of excuses to use if i needed to leave somewhere, none of which involved admitting to anything emet or anxiety related, for example, i feel a little light-headed - dizzy - have a terrible headache and I need to step outside for some fresh air for a moment or I need to leave. Then you just get your bag, smile, say sorry and goodbye and leave. Done. No fuss.

The other extremely useful thing she taught me which i still do now, and a few other emet friends also now do too, is this; so, you feel iffy, so you make your excuse from the list above, say you need to step outside for some fresh air/go the bathroom, once there, set yourself a time limit, for example 30 seconds, and tell yourself that once the time limit is up, that if you haven't been sick or feel even worse then you will extend it or if not then you will leave wherever it is you are at and go home. Using this technique I have never ever once needed to leave either a social occasion or my job and go home EVER. Honestly, after the first 30 seconds is up, give yourself another 30 then maybe 60 seconds and gradually increase it until it is a few minutes and I always find that in the end, not only do I feel fine, i get bored waiting for the next target time to be up and end up going back in and sitting back down again, it works.

Like Syrup says, this needs nipping in the bud and I think the fact you are worrying already about something happening next year shows that you are generally anxious which always seems to set off emet again, so try a bit of CBT if you can and discuss specific things like the wedding and also practice plenty of relaxation techniques to tackle the underlying anxiety you are experiencing at the moment.

[embrace]

Thank you both for the great replies. Do you know if you can get CBT online? I'm not really sure if o feel comfortable going to see a real person with this x