Okay so like all of you on here I have a fear of..well you know what. I'm 25 years old and I'm pretty sure it will follow me for the duration of my life ,this I have learned to accept and sometimes embrace.it has taught me a lot about myself and in turn to be more aware of other people's fears. Now today was pretty much the worst day for me (an emetophobes) life because you guessed it, I have or rather had the stomach flu. Now on top of being at work and the absolute horror to discover this was exactly what I thought it was, at least 4 people watched me in disgust and fear as I ran out to try and make it to my car in time. Stay with me because this is were the story gets a little interesting. Of course I felt better after the event was over and it was a little humorous because of course this would happen to me of all people. An emetophobe that would call out even if her stomach growled in hunger (because you never know). I went in today because I really did feel fine up until I didn't. Despite stopping at my old high school for another round while the kids were heading off the bus (yes they were just as terrified) I made it home in one piece. So this is were the interesting thing happened. Many of you who had the honor of getting the stomach bug sadly know that there is plenty more where that came from. This is the part that really gets me. Okay I can handle once but five or eight times that's just torture. Well this time I had a secret weapon that I didn't realize I had with me the entire time till recently. I was going to beat this damn thing because I am in control. So two hours later I'm sitting here(well actually laying) but I'm not sick anymore in fact I might be a little hungry. And believe me I was sick as a dog this morning. So how did I manage to overcome the unavoidable? Meditation. I know it might seems crazy or bogus. But it's not. All I did is lay there in my room. Completely alone with just my breathing. Something told me that I have the power to heal myself and all I needed to do was focus. It wasn't easy, it was very hard actually but breathing in and out and listening to my body and loving my body enough to believe that this could work...well it did. This is not the first time I have done this but this is the first time that I could actually know for a fact that I can beat it. And you can too. We as people think we don't have control over things we actually do, and we think we can control things we actually can't. Perspective is key here. My body is mine. The only thing I really do have possession over and I can take care of it. I just have to cut out all the noise and love myself enough to do it. Now just like trying to get abs for the summer when you've been eating like crap all winter. You have to excersise the brain like you would any muscle. It has taken me therapy, hospital visits, and medications and of course a lot of meltdowns to get me here. But what I was looking for was inside myself the whole time. I know this post might be a little long for you guys and seem preachy (i hope not) but if you give yourself the chance to channel your inner bad ass self you can over come what scares you the most.