Scared...I DON’T WANT TO!!!!!

[hannah33]

Ok guys, this is what we all dread...going back to a place where we have been sick [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img] I'm really scared to go back there...I REALLY don't want to. As you can understand I have done everything in my power to not have to go back there, and it's been over a year...maybe closer to two. Either way I DO NOT WANT TO GO! I am by no stretch of the imagination going there willingly, I am going there because I absolutely HAVE to and I have NO other option. Being boxed in and cornered like this terrifies me....I am really scared, not just of going back there, getting sick again (I didn't v* but I came very close *knocks on wood*, extreme n* to the point where I almost let go and gave in, I need the strength to not think like that again), being stuck there with no way out...no escape route AND I DON'T WANT TO GET SICK AGAIN I AM SOOOOOOO SCARED!!!. I am also afraid of returning to that abusive enviroment and consequently letting myself slip back to the submissive place that I was when I was removed from that enviroment (My mom's house, her boyfriend at the time/ husband is abusive) some years ago. I understand that I shouldn't be going back there and exposing myself to that again, but, as I said I have no other choice. My dad has to go out of town for 3 days/2 nights on buisness and he doesn't trust me here by myself *coughcoughPARTYcough*. All other avenues have been exausted....please help me.
Hannah
P.S. on top of all this my sister's Fiancee was rushed to the hospital and he's going to be there for at least a week (and yes I went INTO the hospital....only for him, yay for me) Of course being in the hospital also makes me worry about having been exposed to any sv's that might take effect and make me sick while I'm at mom's. *sigh* I need a hug...

[californiagirl]

I think I may be clueless, but where might this "place" be?

[hannah33]

My mom's house...it's about an hour away (ugh the possibility of car sickness) in a place called Pouch Cove. It's on the northern tip of the avalon peninsula of newfoundland (canada). Is that what you meant?

[rubysoho120]

Hugs for you. Just stay strong, and remind yourself your not
alone, we are all here for you. How are you now??

[crystalmom]

I can't possibly imagine what you must be feeling. I think that going back to the abusive situation "place" would be much harder than the thought of previous v*, or near v*, experience.


All I can say is that we are hear for you, and I will send good vibes across the country (I'm in Alberta) for you to be as strong as possible in this!


Please let us know how things are going! <<<HUGZ>>>>


Crystal[img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]

[tabycat]

I kind of have a similar problem, I have a fear of going anywhere near
where someone else has v* even years later, like sometimes when going
into my parent's bathroom I remember when my mom had a sv about 4 years
ago and kind of freak out. But I never have that problem with
myself, but seeing as my phobia doesn't consist of fearing myself being
sick I guess it makes sense

[hannah33]

Thank you all, I'm actually just about to leave. I'll let you know how it goes.
Staying stong,
Hannah

[emetojackie]

I kind of have a similar problem, I have a fear of going anywhere near where someone else has v* even years later, like sometimes when going into my parent's bathroom I remember when my mom had a sv about 4 years ago and kind of freak out. But I never have that problem with myself, but seeing as my phobia doesn't consist of fearing myself being sick I guess it makes sense

DITTO!!


Let us know how the visit goes hun, I'll be thinking of you.

[Babydoll]

but just think, its like being struck by lightning twice in the same spot!! very very unlikely to ever happen!

[hannah33]

hehe....I survived....I think *knocks on wood* I made it through this time....i'm still not exactly excited to go back, but I made it [img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img] Thanks everyone for your support, it feel great to know that I'm not alone
cheers
Hannah

[crystalmom]

Good for you girl!


Crystal