My cry for help!

[tuk1]

I stumbled upon this forum by accident. It's astonishing to
see that there is a community of people that suffer from Emetophobia, before
now I didn’t know the name of my condition or the fact that I had one! It
appears as if this problem has a wide range of specifics and I don’t know if
the nature of my condition can be helped. The following is my story; aka my cry
for help!



I’ve been suffering from a fear I don’t know the cause of or
solution to for as long as I can remember, my most early memories are from
Elementary school. I’ve never had the courage to admit this to anybody, but my
problem happens like clockwork in tight social situations and has completely
spun out of control... I panic and have a nauseas feeling that’s so
disgustingly intense it causes more panic and fear than I can handle. It hits
me like a brick wall and can come and go on an uncontrollable whim. It’s the
fear of vomiting or getting sick in front of other people that has spun so far out of control that’s its ruining my
life. It’s created who I am; it’s caused me to eliminate myself from every
social situation where the feeling might have the chance of manifesting.



For example;



- I cannot attend ANY classes where I must sit in a room at
a desk with a bunch of other students for any amount of time. This is probably
the biggest event that has blown my fears to astronomical proportions. I have a
ton of bad memories of having the panic/nauseas feeling and freaking out in
class because I don’t know how to take control of my condition during a
lecture.



- I can no longer ride in the car with any friends or family
unless I am the one driving and in control at all times.



- I cannot meet any new people unless it’s something I
arrange and have control over.



- I cannot apply for a job knowing that when I go in for the
interview I will be so uncomfortable in the situation being one-on-one that my
nausea and panic will return.

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- I cannot go to any doctor’s appointment because I know the
inevitable feeling of the fear of vomiting then and there will consume me and
actually CAUSE those feelings.



- If I go anywhere with friends or by myself I make it a
first priority to scope out where all the restrooms are and the easiest way of
accessing them should the feeling arise.





My condition/fear has cost me the lack of any love life, my
job, my education, some friends, and most importantly missing out on a lot of
life’s experiences. I’m really at a loss for words. I hope I’ve come to the
right place and pray that help exists as this monster is consuming me.



Thank you.

[marieb73]

Welcome! There is tons of good info here. In the Questions section, Sage has a whole bunch of qurestions that her microbiologist son-in-law answered that might help, and there is also good stuff in the Treatments section.

You aren't alone!

[spilled_milk]

Welcome! I used to be like you, but after coming here and working with a psychologist, I've gotten a lot of my life back. So, I know where you're coming from. I also had my fear since I was very young, about three or four years old.


Anyway, feel free to post!


&lt;3 Anya--

[crimgoddess]

Hey there- welcome


I think the first thing you have to do is stop telling yourself that you "cannot" do things. The moment you phrase something like that, it becomes a declaration- something that you cannot do because of factors beyond your control when in fact you have decided for yourself not to do those things out of fear. Physically, you can do them- you just need to deal with the mental aspect of it which tells you that you can't.


You have created this list of things that you cannot do, which then gives the justification for avoidance. The only thing is the longer you avoid these situations, the more the avoidance is justified, along with the idea that anything related to vomitting/anxietyMUST be avoided because it's SO horrible, which it is not. Hence, the irrational fear- you mayknow that vomitting isn't horrible and at times your body needs to do it- but fear it anyway. When this fear translates into avoiding situations not even directly related to vomit or vomitting out of anxiety, it can be really problematic.


Have you considered therapy? A competent counsellor/psychologist can give you the tools and support you need to beat this thing- and it can be beaten. However, it's not one of those things that go away on its own, it really needs to be worked on. In the treatments section, there is a lot of info related to therapy- even info that you can print out to give your therapist an idea of what he is dealing with if he has not worked with an emetophobic before.


I sincerely hope that you improve, as right now it seems as though you are missing out on a lot. Life is waay to short for this to consume you!


Welcome xxx


*amber*Edited by: crimgoddess

[suze]

Tuk, wow! I could have written that - it is me, completely. We are frighteningly similar. I think perhaps I am further along the 'coping' line so I hope that gives you some reassurance that you can learn to overcome, or at least cope, with the fear.


I think the key for me has been convincing myself that whatever the situation, I can get out if necessary; unless you're shackled to the desk then you are in control enough to get up and leave.Remember, control is the issue here, not the v*.


I think therapy is the way forward to get this under controlbut in the meantime if you're in a situation where you feel you can't escape e.g. a meeting, class, interview, have a word with the person running things and just say you've been feeling a little unwell and would they mind if you slipped out quietly should you need to. This helps for me as I don't need to explain things any further and if I need to leave I can and no further questions will be asked. On journeys, take a motion sickness tablet, this should ensure that nothing bad happens. I also carry anti-emetics with me (motilium 10) and take one if I'm feeling very anxious.


I'm not advocating relying on drugs, excuses etc., but in the short term, for me at least, they are coping strategies, and having learned that I can cope in these scary situations, my need for the drugs and excuses has diminshed massively. I think also that you should pay very good attention to how you feel in these situations, how your body is reacting, how your mind is reacting, what happened to you etc. Then when you're calm, write it all down. If you keep a log of the feelings, the reactions etc., then you'll soon recognise a pattern and you'll come to realise that these feelings are anxiety related, nothing bad ever happens. This has helped me to stave off bad attacks as I can recall a previous event when I felt the same and I was actually fine.


You can train your mind and body to recognise the feelings of anxiety and this will stop them escalating and putting the fear of God into you. Believe me, I know exactly where you're coming from. Things have improved hugely for me and they will for you too. Good luck!

[momof2]

After reading your entry...it is astonishing how I feel EXACTLY the same way. I can barely get into a car...and definately won't if I can't drive.


This is ruining my life...I am no longer in control either.


Sadly, I have no advice as to how to overcome this. But, you are not alone.