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  1. #1
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    Hi I am new here. I have been emet for as long as I can remember, at least back to age 6. It is a daily struggle but like a lot of you I mike it through from day to day. My other issue though is that as much as I hate v* I find it sexually arousing. I don't know anyone else who feels this way. It is like the biggest turnon for me and I think it is so awful to feel this way about something so disgusting and something that I hate so much!!! I don't know what to do about this, please help!

  2. #2
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    Are you serious???????????????[img]smileys/smilies_03.gif[/img]
    Kate
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  3. #3
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    Im not trying to be rude, but I just dont see how you can be emet and find anything to do with vomit sexually arousing.

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    Yeah, it doens't make a whole lot of sense....can you explain it alittle more to us?
    Kate
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  5. #5
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    [img]smileys/smilies_27.gif[/img]You may have more of a fetish than an emet issue. Or hopefully no one is joking around in the site. If you are joking around on the site then that is not cool. Emet is something serious that affects peoples lives dramatically being at home, work, kids, relatioships etc. This is a place of support. Not a side show act to point and laugh. If you are serious then welcome to the site. Someone wil always be around to listen to you and offer their supprt.

  6. #6
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    I dont think that is possible...because when emet develops your brain
    goes through and you either fear it, you dont notice it or it turns
    into something sexually arousing...it happens when you go through
    puberty. it wouldnt be possible for you to both be scared of it and
    ahve it arouse you....sorry to pop our bubble but as taffy said...this
    isnt a joke site, so please leave
    I love Sam
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  7. #7
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    Wow...Um I agree with everyone else, if this is a joke it ain't funny. You can't fear something and have it be a turn on...that doesn't make any sense. If this is a joke then please leave...like everyone else already said.


    ~Monica
    David Duchovny I want you to love me
    To kiss and to hug me, debrief and debug me
    David Duchovny I know you could love me
    I\'m sweet and I\'m cuddly-I\'m gonna kill Scully!

  8. #8
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    Not to be rude, but I really hope you are not making a joke out of this phobia. I find it impossible that you can find it sexually arousing,and be terrified by it at the same time.

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    I think you're all kind of jumping to conclusions here, I don't think you can judge Marsie before you even let her explain.


    If you actually go on to some of the emetophilia sites you'll see that many of them are or used to be emetophobic too.


    It's almost the same thing really, two people see someone v*ing and both get a suddenchemical rush. An emetophobe would interpret this as fear and an emetophile interprests it as arousal.


    Marsie, do you feel the fear emotion first and then the arousal emotion afterwards? Perhaps you should try looking up an emetophilia website as well and try and find someone in a similar situation. Meanwhile we're here for you on IES too.

  10. #10
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    Either this is a really sick joke (which it better not be), or you have a split personality problem because there's no way in the world or any other to have something you absolutely hate turn you on. if you are joking, shame on you. Edited by: metallikat87

  11. #11
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    From the wikipedia page about emetophilia:


    An online site theorizes, "vomiting was probably something either arousing or frightening to emetophiles at some point ... it aroused powerful emotions, and the emetophier called upon these emotions for the purpose of sexual gratification." (Frequently Asked Questions about Vomiting)


    Emetophilia may be related to emetophobia, the fear of vomiting. Many emetophiles, ironically, continue to fear vomiting themselves despite the amount of time they spend fantasizing about other people vomiting.


    So please stop the judging guys.

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    uhmm hmm.. i dunno what to say really.. i am not going to say anything rude or judgemental just gonna say what i feel here..


    Because I am so terrified of this i could never be aroused from it myself personally but i do know this fettish is out there..


    one time my husband had been looking up v** porn online behind my back and it scared the crap out of me! i wondered all day with a sickness in the pit of my stomach if that was something he was secretly into because i could never do it because my fear lies too deep. I was nervous about it the whole day and confronted him and he told me that this guy at work was really into it and he didnt even know it existed so he looked it up online to see what it was all about.. he said it was disturbing and would never wish upon me to v** on him ever. So that releived me but I do know people are out there with this fetish so you are completely normal..


    I just dont have it.. sorry if i dont understand but i wont judge because i dont understand.. i have been through that for too many years of being judged myself with this phobia! blah..
    \"Dance like no one is watching, Love like you will never be hurt, Sing like no one is listening, Live like heaven on earth!\" Mark Twain

  13. #13
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    This "omg you can't like vomit and be scared of it at the same time, you'd better be joking" is really kinda mean.

    There's nothing unusual about having a philia and a phobia of vomit, seriously. I personally think that a turn on from X stimulus, in this case, vomit, is just a sorta "side effect" from the deep ingrained nature of the fear, in which you fear it so much it turns you on in a way, due to reasons we have yet to understand.

    Like a few have said in the topic already, some emetophiliacs deeply fear vomit but can't help being attracted to it.

    Most likely I see the emetophobia being a plant, and the emetophilia being one of those branches or roots of the plant. I reckon if one day you get the emetophobia treated, then the emetophilia will disappear with it too. So don't worry, it's normal.

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    Im going to edit my post and appologise, I didnt know that our forum would accomidate this side of emetophobia.

    If you ever need anyone to chat to or just a shoulder please pm me or anyone, they are all very lovely people here, with also a very wide oppinion range, so its good to have a "discussion" with them all lol..

    With also what sage has said she is of course correct, please dont feel that you cant come back and talk to us.

    My appolgies again

    Violet x

    Edited by: violet

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  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by x hannah x


    From the wikipedia page about emetophilia:


    An online site theorizes, "vomiting was probably something either arousing or frightening to emetophiles at some point ... it aroused powerful emotions, and the emetophier called upon these emotions for the purpose of sexual gratification." (Frequently Asked Questions about Vomiting)


    Emetophilia may be related to emetophobia, the fear of vomiting. Many emetophiles, ironically, continue to fear vomiting themselves despite the amount of time they spend fantasizing about other people vomiting.


    So please stop the judging guys.


    EEWWWW!!! So, to compare this in an analogy:


    Does this mean that it would totally, gratifyingly, excite me to have sex with my disgusting ex-husband, who I, in the past (and present actually), was so repulsed by, he made me sick??!!?I can't, for the life of me, understand how something that was gross and feared could suddenly become a sexual turn-on! That is just plain SICK!!
    ~*~Charlene~*~

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    It's not sick, its neurological. Emetophobia is all in the mind, as is emetopilia. Brains work in strange and upsettingways and we on this site know that better than anyone.

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    Guys, please be nice. Marsie, welcome to the site! I am going to send you a private message, ok?


    Please don't leave because some people have been rude! We can all help each other with this.



  18. #18
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    Hi and thanks to those who offered support. To others, this is no joke and something I deal with everyday. I hoped that some people in the emet world could help me because the people in the emetophile world would only encourage me in the other direction so I am too scared to ask there. This is something I haven't even told my husband about. I'm glad there are a few people here who know what I'm talking about and can offer support. I don't mean to gross anyone out, but there are someemets who have trouble with public places and there are some emets who have my kind of thing. I hope we can all support each other. Thanks to hannah for posting the links to Wikipedia and the Vomiting FAQ. I had seen the FAQ before and that is what brought me to this site. I'm glad I'm not alone as an emet and hope I'm not the only one with the philia too.

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    Marsie i don't suffer from emetophilia myself (i had actually never heard of it before, but then a lot of people have never heard of emetophobia before)so i can't really relate to how you are feeling. However i really hope you can find some support here.


    I think people are finding this so hard to handle because we fear vomitingso much. HoweverI think it's really sad that some people on here are so judgemental...just because you have never heard of something before or cannot relate doesn't mean it doesn't exist or that the person isn't suffering. Let's not treat Marsie how many of us have been treated before for being emets, we all know it sucks.
    *katy*
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  20. #20
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    I'm just not understanding the correlation between the two extremes. I'm sure you can understand how we are totally grossed out by the sexual arousal factor of something we can't even stand to see or hear, let alone get excited with "it" on us.
    ~*~Charlene~*~

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    I really wasn't trying to be mean to you, i promise...i just really wondered if you were serious or not.....please except my apologies...just needed some further info from you....we don't hate you at all. Keep posting!!!
    Kate
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  22. #22
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    I wasnt trying to be mean .............. I just honestly can't wrap my brain around the two extremes. I want to welcome you to the site, and I do hope that you find support here and that maybe someone will come along that suffers from this phobia in the same way you do that can offer you more help and advice than some of us can.



    Edited by: jennyleigh1975

  23. #23
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    I can completely understand how one extreme can lead to another.


    There are people who end up in situations where their lives were in grave danger- afterwards, they realize that they like the "high" that resulted, and end up deliberately putting themselves in situations, even though it scares the hell out of them. The fact that it does scare the crap out of them is PART of the high. The extreme terror is part of what makes it exciting.


    I find it very sad that people were so quick to judge- to call it a "joke", suggest that marsie leave- or call it just plain "sick". Would you like to be told that you are "sick" because you fear vomitting, or be made to feel inferior? It's obvious that the tone of the original post was not in jest- I think that if someone wanted to Troll us, the message would be a lot more explicit.


    I'm glad that people apologized for their previous assumptions- I was frankly shocked when I openedthis thread by the reaction. I know that for some of us it may be unfathomable that people may be both repulsed by and aroused by vomit, but they alsoshouldn't be made to feel badly when they are asking for help.


    Just because you don't understand something, you don't have to discard it as not possible. I happen to agree with Kristin when she said:


    <<I just dont have it.. sorry if i dont understand but i wont judge because i dont understand.. i have been through that for too many years of being judged myself with this phobia! blah.. >>


    None of us like being judged because of this phobia- there are constantly posts about people not understanding how severe the problem is, or berating one of us because we did something/didn't do something due to emetophobia. I don't think it's fair to do the same to someone else who is genuinely asking for help who has a different variation of this problem and who is having a hard times coming to terms with it.


    Marsie- first off welcome. Second, I'm not really sure of the solution to this issue, or how it should be treated. Hmmmm- I'm wondering what Sage, the resident "expert" in terms of treatment (she is a psychologist herself who has been treated and considers herself cured) would suggest- or if it even would be different from standard treatment.


    Maybe the reason why you are aroused by it is that you are SO repulsed by it- maybe if you weren't so repulsed by it, and did CBT therapy to view vomitting as a normal, bodily function, the attraction wouldn't be there anymore. Removing the extreme emotional response that you have to vomitting may end up removing the aspect that is arousing. Of course, this is only a guess on my part- I really have no clue.


    Goodluck on everything- if you ever want to talk feel free to PM me.


    *amber*

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    Hmmmm- the more I hear about it, the more I think that to some extent we all may have an unhealthy fixation on vomit. It may not bring about sexual arousal, but it is there nonetheless. Why else would we think about it so often? Or better yet, why would we routinely visit a message board dedicated to vomit, where almost every topic involves it in some way. Sage mentioned that if someone tags their post as "graphic" it gets a lot more hits.


    Even though it may not lead to sexual arousal, I think to some extent the people who come to the board regularly are both fascinated and repelled by vomit (myself included). We may fear it, but there is something else that compels us to come here and read about it. I don't think the two categories need to be mutually exclusive- or that they are in extreme conflict.


    *amber*

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  25. #25
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    Okay, I'll admit that for me the thought of v* and sex together is enough to kill all</span> arousing thoughts I might have from now on.

    However, you're not me, and everyone is different in what turns them on.

    It probably is similar to all us emets in that it has to do with an unhealthy fixation with v*ing.

    You really seem to hate this about yourself, so I think maybe a good first step for you would be to accept this about yourself. Just in that you stop beating yourself up for it. Then maybe you can look into some sort of treatment, if that's what you want.

    Edited by: chicajojobe

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    I would like to add my apologies but I would also like to say that I do NOT think people with Emetophillia are "Sick" Or "Weird" Or anything like that. I happen to think that what you do behind closed doors with a consenting adult is absolutely fine. I have some fetishes myself that people would find "Odd" But Once again as long as you practice them with a consenting adult there is NOTHING wrong with being aroused by vomit.


    That being said, once again I am sorry, but you have to understand WHY we thought it was some kind of joke, don't you?


    ~Monica
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    To kiss and to hug me, debrief and debug me
    David Duchovny I know you could love me
    I\'m sweet and I\'m cuddly-I\'m gonna kill Scully!

  27. #27
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    Hi Marsie,


    Gee I'm so sorry I haven't seen this post earlier. Please, please do not leave here OR think that you're a complete and utter freak - you're not AT ALL. Experiencing sexual arousal and fear at the same time is absolutely "normal" and can happen to anyone. Once it happens once, unfortunately these parts of our brains have an excellent "memory" and it can happen again. I'll give everyone a couple of case-study examples:


    A girl was freaked of examinations, and was sort of calm during one at about 14 years of age. She got busy answering the questions, and then suddenly the bell rang and she was out of time, but hadn't finished the exam yet. For some reason as she panicked and tried to finish the remaining questions quickly, she had an orgasm - her first one. She was so shocked, embarassed and afraid, that ever after that when she felt rushed or panicked, she would either orgasm or become sexually aroused. It made her feel so stupid and ashamed that she could not even form normal sexual relationships in the future until she was treated.


    I have read of others with philias to such things as vomit, defecating, etc. basically for the same reason. Sometimes it stems from being sexually assaulted at a very young age. Many young girls and boys, when sexually assaulted by their parents or whoever still get sexually aroused because it's basically a "mechanical" thing and can't be helped. Because they feel so UNBELIEVABLY ashamed, violated and horrible...the sexual arousal only makes this a million times more confusing and humiliating. Yet again, the brain has this stupid "good memory", and sexual arousal may indeed occur again for these people during the "worst" of situations.


    Most people who get some sort of arousal like this from something they hate or fear are far too ashamed to say anything to anyone.And no wonder why - look at the reaction they usually get. Being told they don't belong, they aren't really afraid like "us", they can't be serious. Good for you, Marsie, for having the courage to write it down on this forum.


    As for everyone else who jumped to conclusions and were quick with advice...now you know how others feel toward you - how they think YOU are a freak, can't be serious, and wonder how the hell you can possibly fear something as simple as vomiting. You've just done to Marsie what people do to you all the time. Perhaps a lesson to be learned is to be a bit more tolerant of the folks who think they're experts on your condition and end up just making you feel worse.


    Marsie - the treatment for your form of the disorder is EXACTLY the same as it is for anyone else. Check out the Treatments section - sticky posts on the top for lots of good information. Send me a private message if you don't want to post anymore. And if there's any info I can give to whoever is treating you or will in the future, I'd be happy to do that.
    For more info about emetophobia and treatment:

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    DISCLAIMER ~ Any advice I give on this forum is well-intentioned and given as to a peer or friend or for educational purposes. It does not in any way constitute psychotherapeutic or medical advice. Please discuss anything you may learn from my posts with your doctor and psychotherapist prior to making any decisions or changes or taking any actions.



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  28. #28
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    I think what Sage and Amber have said make sense. Sometimes being in a situacion where you are real scared could potentially trigger other things such as arousal, maybe its like a cross-wiring in the brain or something, but it does happen. Like these people who are "adrenaline junkies" they do things that scare the tar out of them, because they like that feeling and it makes them feel good, the rush of fear/adrenaline. It sounds like the same sort of thing.

    I'm not sure how exactly the brain works, but like Sage said about those who may have been abused, the thinking gets connected shame/fear connected with the arousal that just happens not because you necessarily want it to happen but because its the way the body just works.

    Well, let me throw this out there, maybe like say oh if like say you had to get an exam and it involved certain parts, and well you accidentally got aroused, not that you would mean to, but its just the body's mechanics, and you would naturally feel shameful, but its just a body reaction, not that you mean it to happen.

    Is this anything like your talking Marsie? Or am I way off here? feel free to tell me. By the way welcome and feel free to post. I think those who got kind of upset were afraid of maybe it being a joke on them, but this obviously isn't the case at all, so its all good, we just need to be for real with each other.


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    I'm no therapist, but think about the saying "there's a fine line between love and hate." I think it's sort of the same idea, because I think fear and pleasure probably cause our chemicals in our brains to react similarly. Like if you're being sexually stimulated, it sort of feels like the gradual build up of a panic attack. Same idea, only different. So, as much as we fixate on vomiting and our fears, I guess it wouldn't be surprising to let our obsession of it to go in a different direction--excitement. The adrenaline rush. Am I making any sense? That's just my theory anyway. What sayeth Sage? (who's a real therapist)

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    Hey i didnt say it in my other post.. but Welcome to the group Marsie.. and we are here if you ever need to talk!


    Hugs!
    \"Dance like no one is watching, Love like you will never be hurt, Sing like no one is listening, Live like heaven on earth!\" Mark Twain

 

 

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