Well, this is just my little piece of the story....i am 40 yrs old...i have 2 sons, ages 16 and 12....i was emet before i had them, but it did not stop me from wanting kids really bad. I have always loved babies, and was ready to have my own. I still was scared about being an emet, and being a mom, but i didn't let it stop me at all. Having kids of your own changes you in many ways. I did not come from an abusive home, so i can't relate to that part of the question.....but i do know that we all have the strength inside us to love our children, and be good parents. My husband, was verbally abused badly when he was little, and he ended up trying to do the same with our boys....BUT it has taken many many years of therapy to get him to understand what he is doing to his children. I think that abuse effects people differently, and it all depends on the person that is being abused in how they will deal with it in their adult life. I really hope that you can find some peace about this subject, and go on to have kids one day. They will bring you to tears with the love you have for them...and i have to say, that even though you love and adore your neices and nephews, there is nothing in the world greater than your own kids. It's a love like no other, and i have to say, i would give my life for my boys. They are my heart and soul, and to watch them grow everyday is a true blessing.