boyfriend

[lizzzz2342]

I know there have been lots of topics about similar situations.. but i just wanted to see if i could get some advice. My boyfriend just doesn't undetstand this phobia. He thinks he gets it, he thinks he can relate because he "hates spiders." When trying to explain it to him, i used the example of last winter when my brother got a stomach bug, and i stayed in my room pretty much those entire three days except for when going to school. His response is "liz! thats so dumb! you need to get over it!" Things like that don't help. I wish there was a way i could explain the seriousness of it to him. He's been begging me togo see jackass 2 with him, and he says he'll know when the v* parts are coming. This doesnt help, because i'll still be able to hear it, i'll still be able to imagine it, i'll still be incredibly freaked out. Is there a way i can explain this to him without having to let him see me flip out?


PS. sorry for the long post. i'm just frustrated, i guess i was venting [img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]

[rubysoho120]

most people dont understand us and our fear...but if he loves you in
time he may get it...i just have to keep telling my bf what it means,
and what kind of rituals i do to keep clean and sanitery and over time
he has started to get it...when we eot exposed last winter is when he
has seen me at my worse crying and shakin and freaking out and he was
great about it and i think the only reason is ecause he loves me. my
family sort of is the same way...but they dont understand either...but
i have inflicted emets on all of them...and it has worn off to the fact
that they are all more food safer and snaitizer better and dont want to
get sick too. i wish you luck, you should know you always have us
because we all understand here. plus i will let you know how bad the v*
is in jackass 2

[happyteacher]

Remember lizzz, no one can truely understand, because they don't feel whwat we feel, they can only support us. Try explaining to him that you know it is irrational, but you can't help how you feel. Expain that this goes beyond "hating" vomit, it is something that affects everything we do and every decision we make.


I know that there are a lot of us on this site that don't have the support of their significant others. I don't know, but for me, I would never have married my husband nor continued a relationship with him if he didn't support me onthis. Although I'm in therapy, I never be completely "normal". I need him to support me. Sure, he gets annoyed at times and he is entitled to that, but in the end he will always do what I need him to do.


That's my 2 cents!





happyteacher

[randomshiz]

I have an ex who did the same thing. His best suggestion was "get over it". I've found that when looking for a partner, you need to find a person who can understand emet. Some people are just incapable of understanding how hard it is to live this way, and you need a guy who will be able to comfort you.