Need Help

[samara's on tv]

Okay so my best friend's mom died, and I had never met her, well I did once but that was when her mom was in the hospital. See my bestfriend I met her online and she lives in New Jersey, and yes I've met her in person a few times and we really get along, that is when I'm not in love with her. Which I am now....anyway heres the problem.


Her mom died last week, and she was VERY close to her mother. Now she's depressed and a little suicidal. I believe a lot of things about death and spirits, I just don't really believe that people can talk to them once they have passed. I believe that spirits can leave signs, and move objects, but talking to one, not my thing.


Anyway my friend's girlfriend is telling her that she is channeling her mom's spirit. I think that this is a load of horses***. I'm trying to convince my friend that she is being played but she doesn't get it. Also, I don't know what to do in helping her with her mother's death, and I DON'T think he girlfriend is helping her by telling her that she talks to her mother. Am I right? Or should I just back off and let my friend believe this crap cause it comforts her? It really bothers me that someone would play someone else like that.


~Monica

[glitta_fairy]

I remember when my grandfather died last year and I was so distraught at the time that talking to him was the only thing that made me feel better, even though he was not physically there.Death is such a spiritual experience, it's easy to believe things like what your mate's girlfriend is telling her. I don't think you should tell her it's bull****, cause that's your personal belief, but not neccessarily her's. I don't think it's wrong for her to say that if it's making your friend feel better- it can be really comforting to think of a loved one as still being able to communicate with us- maybe that's what your friend needs right now. Eventually as she comes to accept her mum's death she will be able to talk to her privately without the need for a response.She will also probably have dreams about her mum that will comfort her. If the girlfriend is still saying she's channelling her spirit THEN- like after 6 months or something- that's when you should tell her to shut up, and let your friend accept it properly. Ithink you should let it go for now and just be there for her however you can. I can understand how you feel though-it must be really annoying for you!


Kayla

[christi0126]

I would let your friend do what she feels is best for her to do right now. If I were to lose my mother and I thought that I could find a way to communicate with her and it was comforting me and then a friend who I trust told me that it was a load of crap I would probably end up mad at my friend. Just let her deal with this in her own way. She will come around. Who knows maybe she can communicate with her to each their own.

[tcsarah]

I'm with the others - definitely don't tell her it's all rubbish, as your friend will most likely be getting comfort from the fact she thinks her mumis still around on some other plane somewhere, trying to communicate. I actually believe in life after death so am open-minded about these things, but you obviously know your friend's girlfriend and don't believe her. Maybe she's believes she is communicating with your friend's mom or maybe she'smaking it up to try and offer comfort to her girlfriend- it's a strange way of going about it though.


I hope your friend manages to get through this awful time she's going through.

[shiva]

It's not your place to worry about it.

[Melikasa]

Let her do what comforts her. My mom doesn't believe in all of that but when her brother died (and she was super close to him) she had a dream he was at the foot of her bed saying it was all going to be ok and not to be sad. She said she saw him as plain as day with his smile and his favorite suit he use to wear. Then she woke up.
So since we can't say for certain what is "horse****" as you want to put it, leaver her be. It isn't really your business to call it what it is or isn't.