Why do we get physical symptoms?

[domino2006]

The thing that amazes me most about this phobia is the physical symptoms. I have been to sooooo many doctors trying to explain the unexplained n*, stomach pain, inability to eat, fear of eating, d*, etc. I was told I might have IBS, I was tested for celiac (negative) and then told to be retested, tested for every bug, virus, germ, microbe imaginable and all negative! But still I get n* for seemingly no reason, even when I don't "think" I'm thinking about v*. So why do we get these symptoms? Does this mean when I am cured of emet that I won't get the symptoms anymore? It drives me nuts when I start the cycle of "Am I sick? I shouldn't eat. Now I feel bad because I didn't eat. It's in my mind. No, it's not in my mind. Am I getting a sv*? Now I try to eat but it makes it feel worse. No, I'm not getting a sv*. But what if I REALLY am?" And on and on, it drives my parents and my doctors crazy. They actually laugh at me. I've been told I'm a bulimic. No WAY! I've been accused of being anorexic. Why can't I make it go away! Why does it come on me so sudden?

So what's up with the wierd symptoms?

[Galadriel]

I totally hear you. I know I about drive myself nuts with stomach nausea/pains, intestine pains and the like. Sometimes I am fine for maybe a couple weeks stretch, then it comes back. It always comes back. I notice it goes in cycles, sometimes I'll be sleeping on the couch (due to nausea/stomach discomfort) 3-4 nites in a week, and it'll do this 2-3 weeks in a row, then I'll have a good spell and be able to sleep fine, no real stomach probs. I find this aspect of emet to be the worst part of it, because I always think "what if this time its the sv?" (tho the discomfort most never amounts to anything). Docs never come across anything physically wrong. Its been going in cycles like this since I was a child. My emet has definately improved, but I don't know how to end this aspect of it. It feeds the emet too because I get caught up in the physical symptoms, and naturally dont want to get sick. Its like this horrible cycle. You are definately not alone.
Edited by: Galadriel

[stormchaser97]

It's actually pretty simple. There's a very funny book out by a neuroscience professor Robert Sapolsky from Standford, written for everyday ppl on the physiology of stress called "Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers" It's a very funny and informative read, and might be helpful to highly stressed people like us. (he even talks about IBS). There's chapters on growth, reproduction, digestion, weight, and the immune system, disorders like IBS, diabetes, dwarfism, and prevention strategies.

But the gist of his thoughts are pretty simply that if we were like zebras, say being chased by a predator, all of the things our body goes through when we're highly stressed would give us the best shot get to away and survive the situation, the famous flight or fight response. (i.e. racing heart pumps more blood to your muscles to keep them oxygenated allowing us to get away, urinating or #2 in theory gets rid of dead weight that might slow you down, your body stops breaking down your food cuz digesting your dinner is a waste of valuable energy if you're trying not to BECOME dinner. no need to have your body send out hunger signals to your brain either...) So in other other words, digestion stuff gets screwed up causing GI probs. A lot of chemicals in the body get elevated or re-routed other places to make the best use of resources to preserve our safety.

The problem is our stressors these days aren't life threatening and aren't short term. If a zebra is being chased by a lion, within a matter of a few minutes it's gotten away and can relax, or it's toast. Humans are unique in the fact that we have the ability to think ourselves into a physiological stress response and make it long lasting. Our body isn't designed to maintain those response for long periods of time and it screws things up royally when we do. Elevated heart rate and blood pressure over the long term cause strain on the branching points of our veins and arteries= heart probs. Frequently messing with the natural process of digestion = GI probs.


It really is a good book, and laugh out loud hilarious in some parts. (stories about stress and the origin of peter pan, some wild psych studies, a story about the guy who ingested H. pylori to prove it could cause ulcers, and how an upholstery guy helped cardiologists learn something about heart disease, and some other really goofy bits of history)


Oh yeah, and I told a psych professor about my phobia and he said that this might have been advantageous to people a long time ago. If we were in a group scrounging for food, someone ate something and got sick it might mean that food was poisonous, so us getting sick and/or freaking out (subsequently ridding ourselves of the toxin) would've been a protective trait. It just wouldn't be useful anymore. [img]smileys/smilies_12.gif[/img]

Interesting thoughts though, huh?

Edited by: stormchaser97

[sage]

Thanks, storm for the wonderful reference to Sapolsky's book. I really enjoyed the book, too. And I reference it in my own book...as well I use his diagram of the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems with my clients to illustrate just what you've said.


To reiterate, the mind is a powerful thing, and yes, stress/anxiety absolutely causes nausea. That doesn't mean you're sick, however. In an example from my own life, I had nothing but "stomach problems" as a child and teenager and I was just like what domino describes...always being diagnosed and given medicines, etc.


Once I was anxiety-free (in my late 20's) I've not had any nausea since, but for a handful of times over the past 28 years....and those were not anxiety-related.

[harmonygirl72]

I loved that book, too! So true!!

[tree1211]

Sometimes I feel like my mind is gone, I don't know where it went but it's gone. One year I had such a rough time with my emet, I lost tons of weight and looked like a crack head. I was tested for everything under the sun, and NOTHING! One specialist said that I was anorexic.[img]smileys/smilies_03.gif[/img]


I couldn't believe that this phobia was causing me so much stress that I was actually having symptoms behind it. But now I know, I am trying to cope as best I can some days, weeks, months are better than others. I know that I need to seek treatment, but exposure is just not going to work for me. NOPE, NOPE, NOPE

[stormchaser97]

Sometimes I feel like my mind is gone, I don't know where it went but it's gone. One year I had such a rough time with my emet, I lost tons of weight and looked like a crack head. I was tested for everything under the sun, and NOTHING! One specialist said that I was anorexic.[img]smileys/smilies_03.gif[/img]


I couldn't believe that this phobia was causing me so much stress that I was actually having symptoms behind it. But now I know, I am trying to cope as best I can some days, weeks, months are better than others. I know that I need to seek treatment, but exposure is just not going to work for me. NOPE, NOPE, NOPE

You do realize exposure therapy is not the only kind out there right? There's plenty of other stuff that, while it hasn't cured me, has at least taken the edge of some serious anxiety and made life closer to livable, no exposure necessary.

[tree1211]

Yes Stormchaser I do Realize that.[img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img]

[Galadriel]

Hey Sage, when is your book going to come out? Will it be out in the US? If so I'm running to get a copy!

[sage]

My book is called "The Leadership Trinity: Three Imperatives for Personal Growth" and will be published in June '07. It's not about emet or anything, but there's stuff in it about the brain, and anxiety in general.


tree,


I wonder what you assume "exposure therapy" is when you say it won't work for you. My clients who come in and say this really don't get that it's "gradual" exposure with the emphasis on the "gradual". For instance, the first session would be just looking at this printed on a page: V****. Next week VO*** and then progresses to you drawing a stick-man with a line coming out of his mouth. The only way gradual exposure works is if your anxiety level never goes above 5 out of 10. If it's too high, you just re-traumatize yourself and it's horrible. That's what a lot of therapists mistakenly do, and what a lot of emet clients imagine is the only option.


Some say..."nothing scares me but the real thing"...which only means to me that one has built up a very strong defense against feeling anxious and is "white-knuckling" their way through life. In a trusting relationship with the therapist, and some major coaching on emotion and the feeling of anxiety in one's body...clients begin to let down these defenses and can feel very mild anxiety at the low levels. This is how healing begins and finally succeeds.


It's too bad that most therapists don't know how to treat emetophobia, mainly because they don't realize how absolutely terrified emets are. The ones who truly LISTEN to their clients can easily learn, however.


Don't give up on therapy altogether - it really does work!

[tree1211]

Sage


I've not given up on therapy, when I was a teenager my mother sought out treatment for me and one of the therapist had no idea that emetophobia existed, and told my mother that I was just looking for attention, and that I needed to grow up and act my age. And another thought that I just needed to do it and get it over with because exposure was the best therapy.


Now this was back in the 80's and like everything else I am sure that advances have been made. So when I say that exposure won't work for me, I mean that forcing me to look at it or do simply is not for me. That's all, I am speaking on past experiences. I do believe thatI need therapy I just haven't looked into it in a while.

[domino2006]

Hi All,

This has been a great discussion! I find these types of discussions have been extremely helpful for me. I have been experiencing physical symptoms all my life, but most strongly since the age of 20 when some bad stress (too much work, being on my own for the first time, living in a dorm where a bad sv* went around that I didn't catch but feared) triggered it. Like tree, I lost tons of weight fast, hardly ate, etc. and was tested for all sorts of bugs.

I think I have been unknowingly disensitizing myself for all this time. Like so many on this site, most of my life I would freak out in terror if I saw someone even benind over in public, a car pulled to the side of the road, or anything even suggestive. I couldn't say v* or any other associated words. Then I went to college and saw how people outside of my family react to v* in themselves and others. It started to work slowly. I also had panic attacks and used self-talk and cured myself of that after two years (my mother, not a professional, also counseled me. She is so level-headed!) I have been panic-attack free since the age of 22 (I'm now 29) but still suffered from the n* and other symptoms we all feel so I guess I still had the emet-related anxiety but not the hyperventilating, fainting anxiety I'd had before.

I started working at an elementary school where you can guess I was exposed to a lot of v* and had to react in a professional, caring, in-control way. This helped me a ton. The kids are ruthless! At my first school I got this reputation that if a kid said he or she was going to v* I would immediately send them out to the nurse. That soon got taken advantage of! So I had to steel my will and not be so scared. This helped me a lot and my fear of others v* slowly diminished. It is now completely gone after a kid actually v* in my room and I had to take care of him. I didn't seek therapy or even know what I was doing, but I did get cured. However, the fear of myself doing it is still there, but it really has gotten much better since being on this site.

Last Sunday I came down with a bad sore throat and fever and one or two times I really felt like I was going to v* I had previously promised myself "The next time I feel this way I'm going to let myself do it!" But did I? No! I fought it just like always. That amygdala thing sure is powerful. Thanks, Sage and Storm for your wisdom on the physiology of this thing. I never had a clue our brains were so powerful. I've heard of phsychosomatic illness but I guess I never really believed it until now.

Thanks for showing me that I'm not weird, I'm not alone, and there is HOPE!

One day I will be completely free of this.

Steph

[sage]

Domino,


I can't begin to diagnose you online of course, or do any sort of therapy. But in general terms, it sounds to me like you've made great advances in curing the symptoms of your anxiety (which is great...woo hoo) But you still have the "residual" anxiety problem itself, and it's manifesting itself in nausea now. With some good therapy, perhaps you can get to the root of your anxiety in general...whatever contributed to it in your earliest experience. Once you talk about that with a trusted other, you may find some relief.


Take care,

[domino2006]

Thanks Sage.

Yes, I want to get some help and talk to someone. I tried talking to my mom about it about three weeks or so ago. But I worry that if I find the "root" of this my family will think I'm trying to blame them, or say that they weren't good parents or something. It seems kind of scary to talk about some of this stuff with anyone. But you're right. It's what I need and I need to stop putting it off. It is encouraging to me to know that the n* can go away.

I think my dad is an emet also (he hasn't v* in at least 25 years and when he thinks he is going to be sick he gets very very freaked out). We do the whole routine, we use Purell, we don't shake hands with people, we have lists of foods and places where we NEVER eat. I talk to him about everything and I mean everything, but the idea of mentioning v* to him, well, is unthinkable. Let me put it to you this way. When I was twenty-two I had my last very bad bout of v* due to a virus or food poisoning, I don't know. I was so worried my dad would get it that I cleaned the toilet and sink with Lysol after every time I was s* while I was still waiting to be s* again. My whole life if I was ever sick like that I would hide somewhere in the house far away from anyone who could hear me or find me, and then the next day I would confess guiltily that I had been sick. I'm so strange! It was so lonely and terrifying to be alone like that. One time I was so dehydrated with a virus I almost passed out and still refused to call anyone and admit I was sick because I didn't want to wake anyone up.

Ah, to be raised by people with OCD!

Seeing all that written above makes me laugh at myself! If my students knew how irrational I can be, what would they think?

[sage]

I understand your feelings about your family, and not wanting to "blame" them. Lots of people feel similarly about it. However, this should not impede your progress in therapy. You are you, and they are responsible for their own emotional reactivity to anything that happens with you - you aren't (responsible for them.)


I try to get my clients to think about the difference between blame and responsibility. There is no point in blaming one's family or parents for anything...they are not to blame - they did what they could with the (perhaps limited) gifts they had, given their own childhoods. But nevertheless, the way they were with you, or the way they were not emotionally available for you as a child contributed to your phobia. So your parents were responsible. They may never see this, and they may never "take" responsibility, and that doesn't matter one hoot. It's not about them, it's about YOU. If you can come to see in therapy what your parents may have done to contribute to your problems, and process that emotionally with a therapist you trust and who cares deeply for you, then you will "process it out" and it won't come out in an anxiety disorder anymore. This has nothing whatever to do with blame, or confronting your parents, or anything else. Nothing!


You don't need to talk to your parents about what you talk to your therapist about either - it's really none of their business. Perhaps you might ask them some questions from time to time, without judgment, without blame...but that's all.


I hope this helps. Take care,

[Lynchck521]

I understand those frustrations completely. I gag like crazy have n and stomach cramps and poop like a million times and my mind goes back and forth with am I sick or am I not sick.everytime my mind is like yes this is the time you are actually sick even though it's like every other time that you have been anxious. I hate emetophobia.

[joeylynn]

I too was thought to be anorexic due to my phobia causing symptoms that doctors couldn't identify and treat at a young age. At 18 years old I weighed in at 85 pounds. I couldn't eat -- everything went right though me (literally). I survived on baby food (yes, you read that right, I ate baby food at 18 years old). I lived with a cancer patient who v* often (even at the dinner table). I was one of her sole caregivers. I even gave her morphine shots for pain. She was my boyfriends mother and I lived there with them. She was dying right there in front of me and at 18 I didn't know how to handle it. I was a nervous wreck. My mother and father would beg me to eat and I would try dry crackers were a favorite during this time but baby food was what kept me alive I'm sure of it. Banana and tutti fruiti were the only two I could stomach. So I agree stress does I number on ones GI tract! My mother sent to numerous doctors and psychologists for evaluation and I was put on several medications including Buspar (which I call the Devils drug due to the dizziness it caused me) but nothing seemed to help...until my family physician put me on Donagel PG which was a Godsend but has unfortunately been banned or discontinued in the states (damned drug addicts). But that stuff calmed my stomach the instant it was swallowed...carried it everywhere! Now I'm almost 50, have a 22 year old daughter a one year old grandson and am at a healthy weight! I am still VERY emetophobic and panic everytime anyone mentions a virus, stomach ache etc and OMG please don't let anyone be sick in my home.....there isn't enough valium - LOL so I'm no where near cured just not in a position like I was at 18 and hope I never am again! Thanks for listening and think I'll go out and get that book - need a good read!

[emmalinda]

Are there any emetophobia therapists out there that specialise in this?