Boyfriend about to get the boot! PART II

[1scareddj]

ARGH!!! I seriously have HAD it with my boyfriend!!! He drinks too much, never calls and lets me know where he is at and doesn't come home....he's too interested in his friends and I feel like he doesn't give a crap about me. He thinks he is Mr. Wonderdul and he IS NOT! We have been together FOREVER but I wanted more out of the relationship (marriage, kids etc) and I now truly believe he is not mature enough for it. I have heard his song and dance about "changing" a zillion times and I always hoped that he would change and he never has....he has gotten worse. He makes me wish I was with someone else! I feel guilty about that but I don't at the same time....HE is the one giving me a reason to think that! I just don't know what to do! I could go back to mom and dad's but my dogs wouldn't be happy living in the garage. And my mom and dad wouldn't be happy with them in there either. I have NO MONEY (got paid YESTERDAY and by the end of writing out all my bills I had $7.38 left in my account! That is supposed to last me 2 WEEKS!) then I got the electric bill and it was $420!!! FOR ONE MONTH! My bf has been in the garage a lot using a space heater and power tools and he's got a TV in there etc etc......How the f*** am I supposed to pay that???????? I am going to have to sell my truck (and lose my ass on) and get a storage unit (which I don't have extra money to pay for that every month) Almost EVERYTHING in our house is MINE. If I left he would pretty much have nothing...not my problem I guess.....I keep finding myself wishing my friend Jamy was single. He is a super nice guy and quite drinking about 6 years ago...and I feel guilty about wishing I was with him or someone else......OMG someone, please tell me what to do!!! I am so sick of living this way.....

[silver]

Melanie,


I don't know your relationship circumstances or anything like that, but from what you described, it sounds like a tough situation. It sounds like a lot of inconsiderate behavior on his part. It also sounds like you are flipping the bill for everything and working your butt off...does he work and contribute with your home? Actions speak louder than words and it he has promised to change and continues to do the same hurtful things, it may be time to reassess things. Remember that you are a wonderful person and deserve to be treated accordingly. You are the only one that can decide what is best for your life...if he brings you more pain and confusion than love and happiness, then it might be time to move on like you said. I can honestly say that there have been times with my husband where I have really wondered what the heck I am doing-I think that everyone goes through it in relationships. I also think that sometimes we get comfortable in relationships and chosing to leave a person causes so many other problems (financial, kids, etc.) that we stick around even if it isn't in our best interest. I don't know if this is helpful or not, but it never hurts to have an outside perspective!

[1scareddj]

Hi Silver -


Thanks for your reply...yes he has a REALLY good job as an ironworker and makes near $30 an hour at 26 years old! I just got a raise to $10 an hour (yippee) at my job...so he makes a ton more money thanI do. HE bought this house in July...he pays the mortgage and I pay electic, phone and DirecTV. I just don't know what to do......I have a headache...

[SimplyMe]

Aww, I'm so sorry. I'm usually on IM, just invisible if ya ever wanna chat. (((hugs)))

[rubysoho120]

Uh boys can be so stupid. I think you need to deciede what you really
want. Because maybe its not him and maybe it is. ANd then you run the
game plan by him, and is he isn't into it, then just leave....what do
you think?? easier said than done i know... *remembers we are in same
boat with immature bfs

[kfitz]

AAAW i feel so bad for u hun, i had been feeling that with my boyfriend for soooo long, he wud wind me up on purpose and just be plain horrble. I finished with him about 4 times in 3 yrs (was our anniversary last week) because of how he acted and made me feel but he always came grovelling and because i felt sorry for him i still took him back everytime. However, Friday we had a row and i finished it again n now he's turned around n said he doesnt think he wants to get back with me cos all we do is argue n he wants us to both change but cant c we will. I am totally devastated n cant believe how unhappy i am now, he has never been the 1 to finish with me, ive been doin it for the past six month, few weeks or so we wud have a little argument n instead of me sayin give me some time i wud just finish him, n it totally messed his head up n now i want him back n he doesnt want me.


So i would say really really think about if u def wanna be with out ur fella, i thought i did, i even started liking other lads and wishing we cud be over but normally i wud say ok lets get back together wen i missed him n he wud come running, but not this time. I have been cryin on the phone to him n he sed he jus needs some time I really think he's givin me a taste of my own medicine, does anyone else think that?


So honestly, ur fella mite wind u up so much but picture wot it would be with out him long term.... it might be that u wud be happy without him n if thats the case get rid of him and be happy. Dont be unhappy with someone, ur worth more than that XX