Sad News

[harmonygirl72]

This weekend, one of my 2nd grade students was killed in a car accident. I am so shocked and upset. I have never, in all my years of teaching, had something like this happen. I have no idea what to do. I am the music teacher, so I didn't see him every day, but I did have him three times a week since August, so I knew him pretty well. It was very snowy here this weekend, and I guess what happened is the driver of the car (his aunt) hit a snow plow. They were both killed, as well as his 18 year old cousin and the family dog. All the school counselors, social workers and psychologists in the district are here today to talk with the kids. I have no idea how I will get through this day. Please keep his family and all the kids in my school in your thoughts and/or prayers, and if you happen to have any advice on this terrible topic, I'd be happy to hear it. Thanks so much.


Mary

[missminty]

That is so so sad. Things like that are so tragic and there are no words to make people feel better, i guess you just have to remember the good times. Maybe the school could have some kind of memorial service for him or plant a tree. A girl at my school passed away and we held a service for her and her friends read out poems and played her favourie musc. It was really sad but kind of nice, because everyone remembered funny stories and sweet memories. I will be thinking of everyone affected by this.

[harmonygirl72]

Thank you, Katy. I think the school will probably do something like that. We are having an all school meeting at 9:30 this morning (in a half hour) where we will have a moment of silence and show his pictures, etc. Ugh,I am so upset. And, of course that is making my stomach crazy! I have been to the bathroom three times already this morning! So, freaking out on top of everything else! Thanks again!


Mary

[kellybean]

Oh no, that is so sad. I will keep you and his family in my thoughts.

[harmonygirl72]

Thanks, Kelly.

[missminty]

Mary, you will be totally fine. At least you have something to attribute your nervous stomach to. Things like that make me very anxious too because im always afraid of doing or saying the wrong thing. I guess it will be sad for the little boys classmates because they will most likely have not had to deal with loss before. It sounds cliche but time does really help with loss and at least there are counselors available to try and explain things. Sometimes life is really harsh though and it's hard to know what to do.


I really hope you feel better soon and your day is not too upsetting


Katy x

[harmonygirl72]

Thanks again, Katy. You are so sweet. I do know that my stomach acheis mostly due to this stress. Just like you, I am so afraid I will do or say the wrong thing! I have no idea what I will say to his classmates! And, when I go to the visitation and see his parents! I can't even think about that yet! Most little 2nd graders have never dealt with loss before. But, you're right, the counselors will really help. That's what my fiance said: Don't be afraid to ask them for help. I will try. Thanks again for your replies!


Mary

[emetshelp]

Mary,

There are no words!! What a freak accident! I'm so sorry and have said a Prayer for you, your school, and the family. I can't imagine what that mom must feel!!!!!!!

We all just have to remember that these things happen for a reason, even if we don't always know what they are. When we lose children we have to remember that they were angels watching out for us while they were here and since he was in your life, you were blessed. Smile, He is.

[harmonygirl72]

Thank you so much for your kind words and prayer. I really appreciate it.


Mary

[metallikat87]

Mary,


Ican only imagine how you feel right now. Sadly..my high school was just a very popular spot for students getting killed in car accidents. One senior died when I was in 10th grade. When I was a senior, a very well-liked and popular student in my class died. And just last week (February 19th), another senior who both my brother and sister were friends with passed away in an accident.


It's definately hard but the grief will pass.

[harmonygirl72]

Thank you for your kind words. I am so sorry that your high school has to go through that all too often. In this accident, there was a senior, too...prom queen, etc...so very sad. Thanks again.


Mary

[Galadriel]

Mary I am so sorry. Its really hard when things like this happen. Its always an awful shock, and it takes time. I have said a prayer for you and the family of those involved in the crash and your students. In our class several people have been killed in car accidents and it is really tragic. Hang in there, and don't be afraid to take Imm AD if you need to to help your stomach. Also if you need to talk to one of the school counselors don't hesitate to. *HUG*

[dreamer]

What terrible news. You and that poor family are in my thoughts.

[kate1966]

Oh no, that is so sad to hear. I'm sure it will take a while to adjust to this horrible accident. You and everyone will be in my thoughts and prayers as well...take care Mary...K

[kate1966]

Oh no, that is so sad to hear. I'm sure it will take a while to adjust to this horrible accident. You and everyone will be in my thoughts and prayers as well...take care Mary...K

[silver]

Sometimes there is no way to make sense out of these things. I am so sorry that this happened and sorry for your loss. Regardless of how well you knew him or not, it still hurts and it is still very sad. Let yourself feel the way you need to feel about this, its so hard. They will all be in my prayers as well as you. Take the time you need to today for yourself.

[SimplyMe]

OMG! How awful![img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img] I'm so sorry, Mary! You know you can call me anytime right?! They will definitely be in my thoughts and prayers ... and so will you and the other teachers/students affected.

[harmonygirl72]

Thanks to all who responded. The school assembly was so sad, and then of course, I had his class this morning, too. It went pretty well, all things considered. They are practicing for a concert coming up on March 22, and I told them sometimes it helps to sing when you are sad, so we did. We also talked about dedicating the 2nd grade concert to him. So sad. Galadriel, I thought of taking Imm. AD, and I still may, but so far, it's not quite d*...(TMI, I know!). And, Simply, yes, I know I can call you. Thanks so much for that. Thanks everyone for thoughts and prayers. Youguys are the best!


Mary

[punchbuggy]

im so sorry to here that I too lost a friend from elementary last saturday , also a car accident. all i can say is stay strong.

[harmonygirl72]

Oh, I am so sorry for your loss, too. Maybe we can help each other stay strong. That's really ironic that they were both car accidents on Saturday. Was it snowy where you are?

[californiagirl]

Omg!! I am so sorry you and the school has to deal with this! My thoughts are with all involved. I hope that no one in the car felt any pain or suffered.

[harmonygirl72]

Thank you, Charlene. I hope so, too. I know the 36 year old woman driver and her 18 year old daughter were killed instantly, but little Zachary was taken to the hospital and died later. I really hope he didn't feel any pain. Thanks again.


Mary

[suze]

This is just so tragic - I really don't know what to say. A few of my students have died over the years - car accidents, illness, suicide - but it seems so much more tragic given he was so young. School must have been a very sombre place, but young children bounce back very quickly. They are so innocent that they will be able to focus on the happy times, not the what might have beens, which plague grown ups more. I'm so glad that your school is doing all it can to help with the grieving process.


Your stomach will be in knots - shock can make things very unsettled, so try not to worry, there's nothing physically wrong. It will be tough for a while but time will heal. I can only send my heartfelt condolences to all at your school and especially this poor little boy's family. They must be devastated.


Take care.

[spilled_milk]

I am so sorry! Last year we had two students die in my school, one from a sudden heart attack (his mom just found him layiing in the living room) and the other...I think a car accident or being hit by a car? I know how it feels to realize that everyone, no matter how sweet, can be so vulnerable.


<3 Anya--

[harmonygirl72]

Thanks, guys. You are right, suze, that young people do bounce back pretty quickly. The social workers all commented on how great our kds were today. They all made cards that were so heartfelt and sincere, the way only kids can be. My stomach has been upset all day, of course, but I'm sure it's just from all this stress and shock. You are so right, Anya, everyone is so vulnerable and life is so precious. Thanks again.


Mary

[happyteacher]

Oh Mary, I'm so sorry!


As a fellow teacher I understand what it must be like. We take each one of our students and love them like our own.


All you can do is be there to answer any questions the students might have and grieve together in your own way. Maybe, the kids could send a card to the family or you could plant a tree in the spring or something like that. Something to start healing.


Everything gets better with time!

[madisonsmom]

Ugh! I am so very sorry you are going through this. I havent been on because my laptop has been down. I just checked the site and saw this.


This is so sad and tragic. I dont have any advice but wanted to let you know you are in my prayers and so is the family that this has happened to! [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img] I would give you a big hug if I was there. This will have to do ((((BIG HUG))))

[harmonygirl72]

Thank you so much! Happyteacher, the kids made cards all day today and the principal told us after school that we are going to plant a tree as well as get some books for his class to sign and donate to the school in his name. You are right that we take each student and love them as our own. I have 350 of them, but I do love them. Today I looked at all the other kids and was just so grateful that they are alive.Thanks for the hug, Madisonsmom! I sure needed it!


Mary

[grgygrl]

So sorry, I'm thinking about you and the family.

[shiva]

Mary, I am so sorry.