worst night in ages :(

[Jenneh]

ok guys, im having a major relapse here, things with my phobia were ok, i actually thought i was KINDA on top of evrything, but its all collapsed now, just because of one night, last night.


*sensitive ppl may not want to read this*


i dunno why, bt i was SO close to actually being sick. it was all in my throat and it felt lke my glands were gnna burst. of course, i was having amajor panic attack the whole way thru, which didnt help matters, as it felt lke my heart was burning at the same time. i was violently shaking, i felt lke i cudnt actually control it.


problem is, i dont know why i was really ill i was fine, bt then i got to bed and that was it, was up for an hour just solidly concentrting on my breathing on stop myself from v*ing! but the odd thing is, by the end i got so exhausted i was lke "go on then, be sick" but it wudnt even come. this is the 3rd time iv managed to stop myself from actually v*ing.


i think it mite hav been smthing i ate.. but im really not sure....wish i did no, because im so scared of going out the house today (and i hav to cos iv got an appntment with my social worker later) just incase the horrible feelings come back and i v*!!


eugh im so annoyed


Jen xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[hippyclown]

Oh no! How horrid for you! I feel your pain, that happens to me all the time and always at night when there's no one around. But hey you said at one point you were actually willing to v*! That is sooooooo brave! Good for u! I'm sure you'll be fine, Staycool! [img]smileys/smilies_14.gif[/img]lol!

[Lauralye]

Jenneh,


I have had a few incedences exactly like that. The last time i had the flu, and i was in my moms room cuz i was so scared. Then all of a sudden i felt it. You know. I grabbed hold of the matress and had a total freak out session inside my head. I know that sounds weird. I would have thrown up if i didnt do the deep breath thing. It passed, and i was like, instantly soaked in sweat. Needless to say, i did not sleep that night. (The last time i threw up was at night so when nighttime comes, i wont sleep if i am panicking.) Key thing to keep in mind: DEEP BREATHS!! Good job for doing them!!





thankyousomuch!


-Laura

[jaksparowsemet]

thats a horrible feeling! i wasnt able to stop myself last time i V-ed i put it off for a couple of hours but then i did. ITS SOOOOOO HORRIBLE. congrats. i wouldnt want to leave the house either

[amychristine]

Well, atleast you didn't V. I doubt that it will happen again two nights in a row. Sleep in peace tonight! Usually when that happens to me it's a long time before I feel sick at night again. Maybe it wasa little virus or something. Atleast it's over.Good luck to you!





~Amy

[NCsmile6]

Hey Jen,


Sorry to hear about that rough night!!! Sounded just HORRIFIC!!!! [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]How are you doing today??? I hope you're feeling better!!! Doesn't it suck how sometimes we are doing so good and something like that just comes and bites us in the butt and makes us feel down again?? Sorry about that!!! But things will look up soon, just keep fighting, okay??

[Jenneh]

heya, thnks to everyone for their replies.


physically, i feel a lot better, much less panicky, but im stil so depressed recntly for some reason i dont understand that at all, but oh well, u just gotta live it out.


anyway, tke care all


Jen xxxxxxxxx

[jaksparowsemet]

this morning at about 2 o'clock i woke up and felt like i was going to V-. I think stopped myself but i spent an hour in the bathroom trying to calm down and then another hour and a half in my rom afraid to go back to sleep. b4 i knew it it was time to get up. i just thought i would post that here since it is very like jenneh's dilemma the other week. im feeling better now but am afraid to go to sleep tonight.

[pippi]

deep breath, get your mind off it tonight...that was last night and it is most likely not going to happen again for a long time!
I hope you are able to sleep.

[Scampi]

Jak - take some deep breaths, stick POTC on the DVD and chill[img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img]! You will be just fine if you find something to take your mind off it. I tend to read until I fall asleep and drop the book on my head if I'm feeling icky at night.


Best wishes


Jill xxx

[Abi]

I agree with the others, deep breaths can help so much! I hope you maange to get a good nights sleep. Try and read before you go to bed to take your mind off things.


Abi xxxx

[jaksparowsemet]

thnx for the tips! i actually did watch PotC while i read and took deep breaths, i rolled them all into one! i was hesitant to sleep but i didnt feel to bad in the morning. i did have bad dreams though. thnx guys![img]smileys/smilies_13.gif[/img]