Is there anyone else like me?

[sleepmonger]

Like you all, I am emetophobic.

However, my fear is not rooted in my OWN sickness. While the idea of being ill myself is awful and nervewracking, and I do EVERYTHING in my power to avoid it, my main concern is others being sick around me.

I couldn't even care for a family member or my signifigant other if they were vomiting. This makes me feel like a terrible daughter, sister, person. I am childfree for many reasons, but I could never take care of a sick child. I do not sympathize with people who are sick, I get angry, panicked, and almost...resentful. I watch for pale faces and other signs around me. It's OTHER people... I have no control over it, and it scares the crap out of me.

Anyone else more afraid of others being sick? It seems I'm in the minority here.

[laylamommy]

I used to be that way...and to some degree I still am.

I hate being sick and avoid it at all costs, but when it actually does happen I'm not freaked out or panicky at all.

Other people are worse...and I think that is because I feel I have no control over the situation. When someone in my house is sick, it ruins my day, my week...I'm much more scared of others than myself.

Of course (if someone does) then the sense of impending doom overwhelms me and I'm afraid to do any of the things I normally enjoy doing...because I will forever associate them with someone getting sick.

I used to be more afraid of myself...but after being sick quite a few times (and going through pregnancy) my phobia changed, I guess.

I used to say NEVER ever will I have kids...until I got preggers. Then I made up my mind that I would just have to 'deal with it' and that it was nothing that I couldn't handle as long as I don't let my phobia control me.

I'm not as afraid of Layla getting sick as I am her father for some reason. I feel like with her because I HAVE to deal with it I can handle it...but with him I will have no control over the situation and want to be as far away as possible.

The only thing that worries me about my daughter is...we sleep in the same bed. Both of the times she v* in the past was IN HER SLEEP...and I'm worried that one night she will wake up and just.... [img]smileys/smilies_15.gif[/img]

[kellygirl]

I think we are definately in the minority but welcome -- nice to have someone to definately relates to my life. What you said is EXACTLY how I feel. I am always looking for the sick one in the crowd and get so.... upset when my relatives bring their sick children around.

One time my SIL brought her daughter over and she proceeded to tell me that her daughter had been up all night v* with a fever -- I MADE HER GO HOME...

Don't think she has ever quite forgiven me but... I warn EVERYONE (because I really don't care what others think) of my phobia and ask them not to come around me or share "stories" -- just makes me panic.

I do have a 13 year old daughter and up until a week ago I had NEVER cared for her while she's been ill (I posted this elsewhere). I would pace the floor while calling anyone and everyone that might take her and care for her all the while crying and feeling bad FOR MYSELF (now that's what I call selfish). Then of course there is the guilt that comes with not being able to be there for family when they need me...

Anyway I'm long winded as you can tell - LOL...

Welcome again -- I hope you find the site both helpful and insightful.

[taylor08]

I'm not like that. I used to be like that but now I'm the opposite. I've talked to other people like you before so you're definitely not the only one like that.

[gumdrop]

My name is Amy and I am so glad I found this group...it is such a relief to find others like me. I am more like you...I am fearful of others being sick near me or around me but then I am also fearful of catching it so I guess I am both. I have pretty much laughed my fears off for years. My friends will make jokes and my husband thinks I am nuts [img]smileys/smilies_12.gif[/img] One time about 12 years ago, he went out drinking and came back drunk and sick. He was in the bathroom v**** in the bathroom. I went in the bedroom and under the covers with my hands over my ears. Finally, when I didn't hear anything and he didn't come out, I called his sister (mind you, it was about 3am) to come over and check on him for of what I might find (ie a mess). Needless to say she did but was not very happy about it and I felt horrible and selfish. Fast forward to present..we have a 10 yr old girl. Whenever she even has a stomach ache, I badger her about how she feels, if she feels sick, etc. Poor kid! A couple times when she has v***, it was in the middle of the night when my husband was working and of course she didn't make it to the bathroom...I actually covered it up and called him crying and begging for him to come home, which he angrily did. Since then he became a nurse so now I even have a better excuse (you're a nurse). I feel to awful though that I am not there for my daughter and that I feel this way when she is sick (heart racing, etc). I am also like this in public as well, won't go near the twirling rides at an amusement park, nervous about being on a plane in case others near my v**** (which did actually happen once...I panicked so bad they moved me to an empty seat in first class...not the best way to get a first class seat). Have any of you had similiar experiences?? I don't know how I became this way...I do remember holding my hands over my ears whenever my brother or sister were sick when I was a kid. Thanks for "listening"

[maddyblythechen]

Hello Sleepmonger,

I'm frightened mostly of myself vomiting, but I also fear others vomiting. While I can't say that my own symptoms are very like yours, you should know that there are generally two categories emetophobes fall into: people who fear themselves vomiting, and people who fear others vomiting. So you are most certainly not on your own here.

~Madeleine

[sage]

Hi Sleepmonger,
That's exactly how I was when I was emetophobic. At this point in my life, 5 years after successful treatment, if the stress in my life goes up (like when I was in hospital) the first thing I think of is whether someone would be sick near me/around me. Then I remind myself that I'm not afraid of that anymore...

But when I was, it was absolutely terrible. I was petrified the whole time unless I was completely alone in my house.

I wish you well. Good luck with getting through this. Remember there is good treatment available.

[lilly]

Hi there, I just wanted to tell you that you are not alone. I have the same problem... although its not as terrible as it used to be when I was young. Before I feared both seeing and doing it myself... now I don't care too much for me, but others... I get anxiety attacks and my heartbeats so fast, its terrible. I too get angry and wonder, why don't you just go the bathroom or better yet if they do "it" in a public place think, IF YOU FELT SICK WHY DID U COME and made US have to see that. I always feared becoming a mother, because I know kids get sick, (I never V*) so I always thought what am I gonna do when my child gets sick, will I be afraid to hold them and make them feel safe when they are sick if I frightened at even looking at a pile of V* on the floor. Well... my son is 1 year and 4 months, a couple of days before his birthday he got sooo sick, he was literally V* every 25 mins from 8:30p till 5am in the morning. I was so concerned for him, but never at one point did I get scared, which was weird since this was always my fear. Sometimes I think the love that you have for your child over powers everything. But I can be totalling 100% on that since I have read here of how many people ARE afraid of their kids doing. Maybe when he's older things might be different who knows. I always felt infants' puke was never a big issue, just milk, I think once your older and it gets "UGLIER" if you will, then is when I fear it the most.

Thanks for reading!

[i_has_boobs]

I can't remember how long I've been afraid of watching others v* for. I don't like to v*, it hurts, it's not fun, but I'm not exactly afraid of doing it myself. I'm never ill tho so it doesn't matter much but when I am I can't watch.
I'm so afraid of others v* that I once ran out of the room when my baby brother started choking [img]smileys/smilies_16.gif[/img] God it was years ago and I'm still so ashamed of it. (My mam was in the room and I didn't go anywhere until I saw her run towards him, but still ashamed). If someone asks me to the cinema, the first thing I do is panic a bit in case someone on screen v* (I still go but worry). I never go out for a lot of reasons but one big one is that I'm uncomfortable drinking around most people in case they v*. I was babysitting once while my auntie and husband were out, and stayed the night. I woke up hearing her husband v* and I swear, I covered my ears and PRAYED to go back to sleep. I had two new ear piercings and crushed them against my head, trying to drown out the sound and go back to sleep...
Saying that, my worst nightmare is to have a stomach pump or endoscope.
It's a hard phobia to live with and very much so affects daily lives, and unfortunately a lot of people just can't take it seriously =/Edited by: i_has_boobs

[sleepmonger]

To I_Has_Boobs (Lol I just made myself giggle when I typed your name, but I digress)

Just wanted to thank you for your post.. it's comforting to know I'm not alone in this. You sound just like me and I wish you peace.