A child with emetophobia?

[tracy523]

Hello,

I am new here. I decided to post to this forum in hopes to get some advice from some of you who have emetophobia. My sister's daughter, who is currently 8 years old is showing signs of great fear of the "v" word. However, my sister doesn't think it's a very big deal, but I think my sister should get her daughter into some counseling. Basically, my niece is starting to show some very strange behavior that I have never quite experienced with any other kids before. For a while she was making my sister take her temperature prior to eating any kind of dairy product for fear that, if she has a temperature, eating dairy food will make her get sick. Fortunately, this behavior has begun to subside a bit. One time, when she was at my house a few weeks ago, she was all upset, and just sitting alone on my couch. I asked her what was wrong, and she said she was afraid she was going to "throw up". To alleviate her fear, I told her to take a Tums, and it would make her tummy feel better. Well this has become somewhat of a placebo for her, and now she consistently asks my sister for Tums on a regular basis. If my sister runs out of Tums, my niece becomes very upset. Two days ago, we had a little party at my house. After the party, I gave my sister some leftover fruit salad to take home with her for my niece. My niece refused to eat the fruit salad, because she had seen that I had fed my dog prior to dishing up the leftovers for them to take home, and she was worried that the raw meat that I fed my dog had somehow contaminated the food, despite the fact that I had thoroughly washed my hands prior to dishing up the leftovers. The first time my neice had ever gotten sick, she had eaten chicken that day, and since then, mind you it has been over 6 months now, she won't go anywhere near chicken, and refuses to eat it in any form. She is recently starting to develop a fear of swallowing water in the neighborhood public swimming pool for fear that the water is contaminated and will make her get sick. If my dog licks her, she gets very upset, and she wants to go home. These are just a few examples. Should my sister be concerned, or is this something my neice will grow out of? I personally think she needs to get my niece into counseling now, before this whole thing gets way out of hand. Any advice would be appreciated.

[abbey__xx]

It kind of sounds like emet to me. I remember when I was nine or ten I some of the same things like I would want my mum to take my temperature before eating if I felt the least bit 'off'. And then since we had a ear thermometer I would take it myself sometimes. I don't really do that anymore though. I've also read it's normal for children- and emets in general to avoid foods they don't think are 'safe'. I for one do that sometimes.
Sorry I probably can't be much help. [img]smileys/smilies_11.gif[/img]

[lyntess]

That makes a lot of sense, emetophobically..

As a child, you don't know your body very well, and you don't have a lot of control over what goes into it. You learn early on that if Mom thinks there's something wrong with you, she dives for the thermometer. It follows that you'd connect thermometer-usage with a sick-or-not answer.

She's beginning to discover other ways of preventing sickness-- controling what she eats, self-medicating with tums (especially dangerous because she IS so young, and breeding dependency on meds already could spiral out of control VERY quickly), watching how food is prepared and served. She'll be on the lookout for anything ELSE she can watch and control, and it's only going to get worse.

I'd agree with you... Get her into therapy before NOTHING is safe for this child. We all know of people who have landed themselves in the hospital for malnutrition because of this very phobia, it's nothing minor at all. Especially starting so young and SO intense.

Your sister will end up nursing this phobia in her child like a cancer, otherwise... Every family event will have to be planned around her anxieties, every meal will be a struggle with special orders and fights about eating enough, everybody will tiptoe around her and that will just make it worse. HELP her!

[harttride]

I agree with lyntess, she should get her into therapy fast.It definetly sounds like emetophobia sadly.At her age, she's still growing and she needs all the nutrition she can get,and if she starts to reject food she thinks is bad, like most us emets do, she can malnurtured(if thats a word).Its becomes a struggle if it gets as bad as some of us have it. Worrying about everything and such.She has her whole life ahead of her,shes still in her childhood years which are supposed to be some of the most memorible ones and shape her into who she will be,and an emet is not one of them.Tell her mother or even you,to try asking her about why shes scared of v*ing next time the topic comes.Like if she says"Im scared to t* u*",ask her nicely,"really? Can you tell me why?" or something like that,Well you get the point.And instead of giving her tums which is very bad at her age,try giving her an alternative like maybe chewing gum ,ginger gum would be good if she likes it or even a minty gum.May,be one good for teeth.Alot of the "tum" eating is because she probably thinks she feels s* or n* when its really anxiety, and that can make you feel like ur goong to be s*.Ginger helps with n* and it's not a drug so its a better alternative.Also chewing gum helps for nervousness and anxiety.I hope everything goes well for her, bescause this is not something you would even wish on your worst enemy,and it's something you must go through for most of your life or even for some of us ,all your life if you dont get some "help".Keep us updated and i hope this helps.Edited by: harttride

[lyntess]

I would hesitate to even feed into the phobia with the gum-- sugarless, ginger, mint, what have you. It's still breeding the obsession with the tummy that we all fight AND feed on a daily basis here! A child shouldn't have to take it to that level.

Also, it's the inability to determine between "real" nausea and stomach-emptying, nervousness, heartburn, hunger, digestion, etc that you'll encourage by giving her gum. Instead of teaching her to listen to her body, you'll teach her to mess with it! Chewing gum for long periods of time makes the digestive system sluggish and bored, and can cause excessive food fermentation in the intestines.

Instead of giving her another "trick" to feel better, find something to distract the poor thing. We all spend SO MUCH TIME nursing this phobia... You know how much worse it gets at night, because we don't have anything to distract ourselves! "I'm sorry you don't feel well, honey. When I feel sick, sometimes I like to read a story. Would you like me to read to you?"

Or play with clay, or walk the dog, or SOMEthing that takes the focus off the phobia and encourages her to live as normally as possible. The mouth/stomach fixation is just going to get worse if you give her something to put in either to make her "feel better"! If you want to give her a stress-reliever, try something to do with her hands instead of her teeth!

Obviously that's not going to "cure" her, and I think professional therapy would be a veeeery good idea in her case, but maybe it could help, at least.

[andee]

I agree too, tracy. It is definitely becoming a problem for her. It also sounds like some obsessive-compulsive behavior is in there too. Poor child, what a huge burden for a little girl. Please talk to your sister...

[prncesspnk]

hi tracy-

i just want to say... my grandmother used to do the same thing with
Tums for me!! it really eased my mind. my therapist told my mom it
was 100% okay. she's a firm believer in really just doing whatever it
takes to ease anxiety. needless to say, i had Tums so often as i child
that i absolutely cannot stand the sight, smell, or taste of them now.

i think it's great that you're so concerned about your niece. it
definitely sounds like some sort of phobia of being sick... could be
emetophobia or maybe another related fear or fear of just being ill or
germs in general. regardless, it sounds to me like she's having a
rough time and should see a counselor. it's good you're able to
recognize these signs and get her help early on. good luck. let us
know how things go.

[wackydeli]

I was going to say that at 8 years old, your niece sounds like she has really intense full-blown emetophobia, when I realized I wasn't much different myself at that age. When I was 8, that summer I couldn't go to bed without drinking a hot tea with lemon, something my parents told me would help with nausea ... EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. At first I'd beg my dad to make it, but towards the end of the summer I was making it all on my own.

I think without a doubt your poor niece has this phobia, and is acquiring the certain quirks that go along with it as you learn more about how the body works. I don't know how I would have felt about therapy at that age, but maybe if your sister is OK with it, and you can explain to your niece that it's OK to do it, it's not going to make her any different, then she'll be able to do it and hopefully grow up emet-free.

Good luck.

[harttride]

I'm sorry if any of the advice i gave was wrong, i would go with lyntess and not give her gum.I didnt mean any harm by saying it, and wouldnt want to make the situation any worse than it is.I thought it would help,but even i'm just learning that gum had those "effects" on your body.I apologize if any info was misleading and hope the best for your niece.


P.S.lyntess thanks for the info!Edited by: harttride

[juliab3]

im only 12 and i have thsi fear

[jkl81]

I started around 8 years old too FYI. It would be interesting to hear back from the OP and see how her niece is now. It seems around 8-9 is a pretty typical age to start.

[mxw08]

I became emetophobic at exactly 8 years old! Okay, not exactly like on my birthday, but the same as what it sounds for your niece, I had the stomach flu once, and have never been the same.

However! It sounds like your niece has some huge problems, and I can tell you now from experience that this is not something she'll grow out of. At least not anytime in the near future. I thought to myself all through my childhood years that by the time I was 18 I wouldn't be afraid anymore, and that this fear was just a phase. You can see by this site that it doesn't work that way. Seriously... I would do whatever it takes to convince your sister that she definitely does need help. This phobia's never been worse for me than it is right now, and even I don't do some of the things she's doing. It's truly not going to fix itself, and if it really is that bad, it's not a phase. Mine was MUCH milder when I was 8, and it definitely hasn't gone away. I really wish someone had gotten me help when I first got it, and I was no where near as severely OCD about it as your niece seems to be. Really... do whatever you can. It is NOT a good fear to have, and it's completely irrational and yet affects lives in extreme ways.