+ A StRaNgE FaSciNaTiOn?... +

[+ kozi +]

+ First of all, I would like to say that I am new here and have enjoyed getting to know the stories of others who have dealt with the same problems as me.

I don't know if this applies to anybody else, but have you ever, for whatever reason, had the strange desire to actually look at someone who is v*******?
I can't explain why this is.
I have two theories:

Theory A: Deep in our psyche we have some kind of a strange fascination with the idea of V* or actually seeing it. We know we hate it, we know we can hardly bare it, but we still have an impulse to see the very thing that makes us vulnerable.

Theory B: We want to force ourselves to get over our fear, so we purposely force ourselves to look at our fear.
We expose ourselves to it in hopes that it will help us break free of this phobia.

That's all I can say to this.
If any of you have ever experienced something like this or would like to give your input, please do. +


Edited by: + kozi +

[hmw2000]

I think that I can relate to your second theory. I think that my psyche tells me to look so that I can try to overcome the fear. However, when I look, I can't keep looking! It never makes it any better. I think that I might do this because I want to know what is going on around me, and if I need to leave the situation, I want to know right then!!
I do know what you are talking about though. Just not sure why I do that when the occasion arises!!
[img]smileys/smilies_12.gif[/img]

[kellygirl]

I too look when I know I shouldn't since my fear is mostly of others!!! But I do every single time. Once in Vegas my husband and I were walking from our car to Fremont Street (downtown Vegas) and there was a guy sitting on the sidewalk, leaning against a building with a brown paper bag in his lap -- he was visibly DRUNK and I knew he was going to or had be v*ing into that bag and I watched him until we were past him, then kept turning around to see what he was doing. My husband finally caught on and encouraged me to keep my eyes straight ahead (as I was getting somewhat panicky).

In any event I always want to see what I fear most (unless it's in my own home!!!).

[jandub]

I am totally fascinated with people vomiting. Its because its my biggest fear, and so to see someone do it without freaking out is amazing to me. Plus, the mechanics of it are interesting also. Strange. I'm scared of spiders but I don't gawk at one when I see it. But I guess I would if the spider were crawling on someone's face and they weren't screaming and flailing. Same thing I guess.

[+ kozi +]

+ Thanks for all your input everyone!

I can only remember actually looking when I was younger.
I was more curious then.
Even though I was terrified, I figured all kids were.
Every time someone in my class would V*, the children would be in a frenzy.
I knew what happened and still wanted to be a part of the commotion, despite the fact that the scene haunted me all day.

I don't look anymore (I know better than to mess myself up anymore than I already am).
I have, however, caught myself looking around the room in all directions in search of where it happened.

I think maybe it's a little of both theories and a bit of impulse as well.
It's quite strange, really. +

[grgygrl]

Its kind of like a trainwreck, you dont want to look but you cant help it, ewww..........

[abbey_16]

I agree i do the same i have to look, when people pull over the side of the road i have to look to check if there v* i dont know why because i hate it and it sends me into panic but i still HAVE to look its like a weird urge its so strange [img]smileys/smilies_12.gif[/img]

[+ kozi +]

+ I do the same thing.
Every time I see a car pulled over with the door wide open, my eyes widen in wonder and fear.
I say to myself, "I'm just checking if they are going to v*, but if they are, I will quickly turn away."
The damage is done, so who am I kidding? +

[wallflower]

Yeah, I can't help looking at it, lol. At my formal after-party last year one of the guys was sitting practically in a puddle of his own v* outside the club and my friends and I were outside; they all kind of said "eew" and looked away, but I, the emet, kept looking at him and laughing...they probably thought I was a weird emetophile or something...
Come to think of it, I may have been subconsciously overcompensating for my emet and trying NOT to look weird by finding it really funny.

...Though it was funny, cos that kid thinks he's really tough but he couldn't handle the alcohol. Hehe.