this is ruining my life .

[canadianreject]

I've been with my boyfriend for a year, and I've told him about my fear of throwing up - but he just doesn't really GET it. To make matters worse, my mother thinks I'm being ridiculous.

It has gotten to the point where I don't even like to kiss him or be too close to him in fear of catching something that will cause me to throw up. I feel horrible because I love him and I understand that by doing this I am hurting him - but I can't help it! Everything he says he's not feeling well, I go into panic mode. I can't even help him when he's sick because it freaks me out too much to do anything !

I just don't know what to do anymore .. I need help

[alwaysafraid]

It was important to tell him about your fears, which you did. He'll stick by you if he's Mr Right despite your issues. Have you considered getting some therapy or perhaps some medications? You can't expect him to continue to understand if you're not trying to help yourself. Therapy made a world of difference for me....learning to deal with anxiety in general. V* will always scare me but at least now I'm no longer obsessed about it all the time. I hope you can find some help....good luck!!

[canadianreject]

I wish that I could. But like I said, my mother thinks I'm being ridiculous and therapy is fairly expensive so she won't go for that. I've told her before I've needed to make an appointment with my family doctor about other issues I was having, but she told me I was being ridiculous then, too ..

[callahan]

Wow... you sound like me! My mom has always thought I was being ridiculous. I yelled RAPE in public when she was trying to force me into a car for an hour long car trip with someone who was sick. And even after that she didn't think to get me any help. Now I'm 22 and getting myself help.

As for your boyfriend, if he's the right one he'll grow to understand it. My boyfriend didn't understand at first. He would get upset because I would avoid him when he wasn't feeling well. Go figure I got a guy with more stomach issues than me and I constantly ask him "how does it hurt? like you're sick or just ate too much" when will it go away"... I pester him so much that now he doesn't tell me unless it's either really bad or he knows its some sort of bug. 6 years later he is completely understanding, he is supportive of my therapy. We have a toddler and both times she was ill he was very understanding and cared for her while I freaked out, and never said a word about "doing all the work." Turns out he was the right guy and it just took him a bit to get used to my quirks.

As for my mom, she still thinks I'm being stupid. I just started therapy a month ago and whenever I try to talk to her about it she changes the subject. She's always been hard on me though... and it's made a strong person so I'm thankful for that.

Hope you liked my book, haha sorry. Just wanted to let you know that I can relate and if you ever want to talk, here I am. [img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]

[alwaysafraid]

You don't need your mother's permission to make an appointment with your family doctor. Since you're old enough to have a boyfriend I'm guessing you could get yourself to your doctor. Also, psychiatry is covered under Canada's socialized medicine coverage (therefore it's free to you). You could also talk to your doctor about free services that exist for young Canadians in the community related to mental health. It exists. All you have to do is ask. Your family doctor can also prescribe you antianxiety medications. If you don't have prescription coverage through your parents they can almost always give you free samples or cheaper medications. I hope this helps.

[psalm139]

I am sorry to hear about all this I will pray for you. people don't understand this fear. I know my family doesn't even my own husband. he thinks i make a big deal over something that is a part of life. HA well it is a part of life that is the problem. everyone has some sort of fear imagine if it was a part of your everyday life. well all know people who are sick alot

[abwenzi]

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[samanthac0928]

same exact thing here...i'll kisshim now and stuff but im already dreading virus season, i'm pretty sure i'll be staying away from ksissing him and stuff.. alli think is wtf am i gonna doif he tells me he has a virus one morning and i was kissing him the night before... ughh i get nauseous just thinking about it!