Hello. I am fairly new here. I am 18 and have had emet for close to 10 or 12 years, ever since elementary school when kids with little self control would s* often. Because it was that atmosphere where I began the fear, it is more other people v*ing than me v*ing that bothers me, but that scares me as well. For me it is almost the actual v* that bothers me, not the action or the idea.

Right now I am about to go to college, and I am also at the age where thinking about my future and my 20s seems to come a lot. I am very afraid of college and growing up because of my emet. I am going to art college w/o sports teams, so I hope the extreme drinking culture seen at larger schools is not there as much. I am planning on living on a substance free zone just to be safe, but I am very very scared of my floormates getting s*

Another huge fear related to my adult life is having children. I have always been excited to grow up and start a family, but as I row older I see the reality of small children and their inability to v* controlablly. When they are s* it seems it is always a mess that needs to be cleaned up. My fear has recently made me think I do not want to have children, which is very very upsetting.

I am wondering who else has dealt with these things and how. I am in therapy but it is not emet centered and so does not help too much. Please help me. I really would love to enjoy school and my life without being afraid of it all.