Does anyone else feel this way???

[x...RaChE...x]

Ok well here it goes.... sorry if this creeps you out guys..... I have been using thinking clearly to help me out with overcoming this fear so the other day I was analysing puking to see what I hate about it. Obviously the idea is.... urgggeee but I also can't stand the feeling before it, you know that groggy feeling and stomach cramps and nausia and the only way to get rid of that unbearable feeling is by throwing up.... thats one of the parts I hate.... the other part is the fact that you will most likely do it again and again which is even more terrifing, it makes me feel trapped If I had to puke once it would be absoultly terrifing but I could manage as I could get it over and done with.... is this the same with anyone else??? Sorry for the details....

[dixy]

***GRAPHIC***

Hi.. I haven't v* (sober anyway!) for so long I really am not sure what it would feel like! I think for me its the first v*.. the second would probably not be too bad. I think for me the sound is awful..(both the urging and the splat!) which would probably make me v* again!! The mess freaks me out too... I have to do it in the toilet..(close my eyes) then I can flush it away without any hassle! I prefer to dry heave..than to bring up food. I have had many arguements with my younger brother who insists on eating inbetween v* as he hates to v* on an empty stomach!!!! (can you believe we are realated!!!???)

[amarkham01]

I have no idea what it feels like, so I don't know why I hate it. I like to be the boss of my body, I guess.

[dixy]

As I read back what I have just written it does seem an irrational fear I have. But I think for me its the not knowing when/where I will v* How long for etc.. I think if I v* once, part of me will feel I need to v* every time I am n*...which these days is quite alot! At least I can tell myself “I did not v* the last 150 times I felt this way so why would I v* now!”

[asdf]

The last time I v*ed was 12 years ago when I was six after surgery, so I really don't know what it feels like anymore. I feel similarly to you though, like I try to analyze getting sick as best I can, and the most unbearable part for me is the thought of doing it again and again, or thinking I'll get sick everytime I'm n* if I do it just once.

[overload21]

I can definately relate. I think I might have posted this exact same thing about 6 months ago. For me it's the nausea and that awful feeling leading up to the v*. And then the fact that you can't breath while you're doing it freaks me out too. Plus it's REALLY loud, which is gross and embarrasing. My husband makes fun of my v* noises.

I think that I could handle all of it better if I didn't have my son. Because now, I not only have to worry about me, but also him and my husband too. Although, when I was still at home, everytime my sister or momma or daddy got sick I freaked out. So maybe it doesn't have to do with him. I think it is the fact that if he does v*, it will be in his bed, or in the floor, or worst of all in my bed, and that I will have to clean it up. Which would mean coming into contact with the germs and the smell. Ugh.

I was fine with all of that until one night, when he was two, he started v*ing and continued to do so about 6 times. My husband wasn't very nice then and he wouldn't help me out, even though I told him I was sick too. Because about two hours later I started v*ing. He finally HAD to get up with our son because I literally was stationed in the bathroom floor. (I ALWAYS have to be in the bathroom floor when I am nauseus. I CANNOT v* anywhere BUT the toilet.)

Anyway, so yes, the leading up to the v*ing is the worst for me, especially when I feel it coming on for hours. Usually I'll feel it coming on all day, and then not v* until 3 in the morning. My sister is sooo llucky, it just hits her and then she does it! I would rather have little warning than have to suffer all day like I do sometimes. I am very un-emet like in the way that I actually v* frequently. You'd think I'd get used to it and be okay but noooo. Maybe one day.

[x...RaChE...x]

I've heard somewhere that emets hold back their vomit for hours! So perhaps this is why we feel so awful before if that makes sense... mind over matter - the worst part.

[annette]

I really believe that it`s all about control, because when people V**, they have completely lost it. It`s also so humiliating, especially if it happens in public, at least thats how it is for me, anyway.

[x...RaChE...x]

I agree with you... mine is definatly about control, my mum says that it has also something to do with claustrophobia as I feel trapped when I feel emetophobic... it all links in mysterious ways

[elizam]

the other part is the fact that you will most likely do it again and again which is even more terrifing, it makes me feel trapped If I had to puke once it would be absoultly terrifing but I could manage as I could get it over and done with.... is this the same with anyone else??? Sorry for the details....

This is totally true for me. Huge part of it. I am an "all or nothing" thinker (a lot of emets are) and I get stuck on the idea of v* and don't view it as something temporary that will not go on forever. I don't know if that makes sense or not, but that's a HUGE part of the fear for me. If I can remind myself that it will only happen a few times at most, it doesn't seem so big and scary.