Babies/Children

[rachelle]

Hey all,
I just wondered whether any other Emets feel the same as me about babies. I've always disliked the idea of ever having any children of my own, simply because of the morning sickness, and because children are always picking up bugs and such like. I dont think i could cope with it and there is no way I could take care of a child wen he/she is sick! I'd be freaking out havin a panic attack or something. I know im only young but I do think about this type of thing alot, because well, shouldnt I want to have children wen i'm older, and shouldnt i be looking forward to it? Quite the opposite, it would be hell for me!
Rachel xxx

[Jenneh]

Rachel, again i feel exactly the same.


morning sickness has always been a HUGE worry for me, bt one of my friends recently told me that they hav a pill to stop morning sickness? dont know if thats true or whatever, or just a rumour... but stil, its a little hope.


as for children getting sick, i am quite worried about that, but... i dont really like to think about it or dwell on it, because i am having kids and no one is gonig to stop me. i need to have kids to break the chain of abuse thats run down our family, its sumthing i just HAVE to do, and nothing, including emet, is going to stop that.


Jen xxxxx

[Eternity]

I never ever intend to have kids. altho mornin sickness n bugs arent really the reasons why, Im jus too selfish, I like havin my own life too much. I think they would put me off slightly if I did want them tho.

[kmarie]

I go back and forth..some days I want one..some days I dont..


There are a few reasons why I wouldnt...the obvious being emet...and..like eternity said..im selfish..im young and want to enjoy life while I can..once I get a little older (Im not even 21 yet) maybe I will be ready to settle into mommyhood.


At this point i would be willing to fight emet to have a baby..but I just have to get past the selfishness..live my life with my husband,,ejoy our younger years..and thne mabye like 4-5 years down the road we will think about it!!

[kentuckygalrk]

This is definitely not a problem I've ever had! Lol.. I think I've wanted to be a mother since the day I knew it was possible, when I was little I never went anywhere with out a baby doll and I've been babysitting since I turned 12 (the legal age here). I guess I just never thought of not having children.


I love kids, I'm going to school to become a child life specialist where I will work at a hospital with children, most of whom have cancer and though it will no doubt beheartbreaking... and I will have to deal with I'm sure my fair share of seeing chemo pukes, I know thatin the end the good things will far outweigh the bad.For me, there are 365 days in a year and most kids don't get sick all that often so I'm thinking the 350 (give or take a few)days a year they're healthy will be definitely worth the love they give.


Don't get me wrong... I hate seeingpeople be sick... but Ijust can't stand the idea of children beingstuck ina hospital room, throwing up and miserable from having poison pumped into their bodies and having no one there for them (other than their parents and doctors) whom they can just talk to when they need a friend. SoI'll suck it up andhopefully be that friend!


I actually had a quote growing and used this as part of a paper in grade school of "What I want to be When I Grow up". I said that all my life my plans have changed. I've gone from wanting the be a ballerina, to an astronaut, a vetrenarian, to a lawyer and everywhere in between, but the one thing that's always remainedconstant throughout is my desire to someday have the privilege to be a loving wife and mother. So yeah... I want kids...


~Rachel

[amychristine]

I am a mom to a toddler and I am now 8 months pregnant. I worry about this sometimes too but I do have words of encouragment for you. When you reach that stage in your life where you are ready I really hope that emet does not get in the way of such a wonderful part of life.


Here are some facts:


Morning sickness. I have had it with both of my pregnancies and IT IS NOT THAT BAD! I have notV*ed with either of my pregnancies. Rarely ever do you need medication to stop the V*. But.. It is available. Morning sickness is not at all as bad as a bug. What happens with morning sickness is usually you have something that triggers the nausea (usually in the morning) like a smell of some kind or the sight of a certain food. Remember us emets are very good at controling nausea and V. Most likely you wont V. If the nausea is really bad your doctor will give you a prescription.


Ok, herea the fact about bugs and kids! (Trust me I have done PLENTY of research on it!) Young children( toddlers and infants) are affected by the rotavirus bug,its "rare" ifother viruses affect them at this age. Well, adults can't catch rotavirus! It's only a childhood illness that most of us are immune to. If you do catch it it will be VERY mild... (I cought this, I didn't V and it is really mild. All I had was the runs for a couple of hours) My toddler on the other hand did V and she had the runs for days.


Most other illnesses that cause V in kids we are immune to. There for, we wont catch them. Kids get sick all the time with that kind of stuff because they are not immuned to it yet. We are immuned.


One time my husband got sick with a really nasty bug and gave it to my toddler who ended up V*ing, thanI cought it but the virus was from my husband, not my toddler.


I usually keep my toddlers hands very clean in the winter months and I keep her away from people who are sick. I would have thought that my panick attacks would be terrible when my daughterV*ed andI had to care for her... but it actually helped me... I am not afraid of other people V*ing anymore unless they have something thatI could catch for sure. I am only afraid if I might V orwhen I feel sick. Hope this helped!


Don't let this fear hold you back!


~Amy

[soluene]

Amy-thanks so much! what a great and encouraging post! I am hoping to be pregnant by this time next year, and you just gave me a boost of confidence! Thanks!

[*kristen*]

[img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img] Hi there !

This is my very first post ! I too have this incredibly strong phobia ! I have a 4 year old and an 16 month old. My 4 year old has had the stomach flu 5 times in his little life, and has ended up in the hospital twice for dehydration. Quite scary. I am in fear every night before going to bed, wondering if he may be sick. It is so horrible. It makes me so sad. The second he sighs, I think he's not feeling well, and I am constantly asking him if his tummy hurts. It it so saddening ! Poor little guy. I am now taking Paxil Cr, to try and calm those anxiety feelings and not worry so much about him being sick. Anyway, I hate even posting thisstuff, but you all are the only ones who TRULY understand this feeling !

Thanks for listening !
KRisten [img]smileys/smilies_11.gif[/img]

[2jo2]

It's ok to not know if you want kids when you're that young. I have always thought I didn't want them, and people said I'd change my mind. I'm 29 now and still don't want them. I, like a couple others, love my freedom, being able to have my husband all to myself when we're not working, being able to work late and take on big projects without feeling guilty, being able to go away for the weekend on a whim.... I'm selfish and feel like I just want my life to be mine. So I have reasons other than emet to not want kids, emet is just another point in the bad column.

[siafi]

I'm mostly afraid of the kids being sick and needing me near them - because there is NO way I can even be in the same room as someone who is v*ing. But, I asked a similar question to this one a while ago, and someone replied that its easier to accept the v* when it's your child who you really love. Also, however weird this sounds; baby spit-up is not bad, and you would probably get used to progressively worse v* after some time. Ha, I don't know though - I'm only 17 but I'd really really like to have at least one child some day!! Try not to let your emet hold you back from something this life-changing and wonderful. Edited by: siafi

[amychristine]

I am glad It helped you out! I wish you luck in trying to have a baby when you do decide to! It's defanantly something you wont regret..


~Amy[img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img]

[Abi]

I feel exactly the same. I think I could never have children because of the morning sickness, but especially because of children and bugs. Children always seem to be picking up sickness bugs, and if I had a child and they told me they felt sick I think I'd run. I don't think I could cope with cuddling my child or anything , just incase they were going to come down with something, especially as it often happens to children with no warning.

[barefootanjel]

I have 2 children and throughout both of my pregnancies my main worry was v*,either morning sickness or what is known as "crowning" sickness.Morning sickness is quite manageable to be honest,it's more a gnawing feeling like you have when you are very hungry,mine was anyway.There isn't anything you can take for it as many anti-emetics are harmful to the foetus,however,there is a rare condition called Hyper-Emesis which can be very serious for mum-to-be,medication and sometimes hospitalization are needed then.


I wasn't sick when giving birth to mine,despite having a caesarian with my first.I'm a great believer in the virtues of the human body in times like that,you seem to take care of yourself.I felt horribly sick but sincerely promised my body serious repurcussions if itperformed such a trivial biological act when I really had more pressing matters to contend with!Seemed to do the trick.LOL


As for children being ill,I won't say that it doesn't often happen because it does.I have only had to deal with it on my own twice as I have a very good hubby who is great when it comes to v* (can you tell that he's NOT emet!?LOL) I panicked,of course,heart thumping,head screaming,nauseous chaos but you know what?...I'm far more afraid of my children being like me,that scares me much more than the v* so I dealt with it quite calmly.They both have sick bowls at the bottom of their bed,these come with us on days out too.Their dad has a little joke about how silly and obsessed mummy is,complete with rolling eyes and hand gestures!They both have a healthy attitude to v*,obviously they get a little scared when it's actually happening but who doesn't?


I would hate to think that someone who really does want children would feel hindered by their emet.It's easy,of course,if you have a support network,friends,relatives and partners who are very understanding.I'm not sure how well i'd cope if I were a single mum..


Rachelle,you may find that you wouldn't want children anyway,despite the emet,like Eternity.Plenty of women feel that way so there's nothing to worry about....a lesson in reproduction and genetics taught me that some of us are Breeders and the rest are just Hedonists!! LOL