I wonder when ill get sick...I wonder how ill handle it and the alone feeling ill have...I wonder how long it will last and if i can get through it....

I have constant thoughts like this....well not constant but pretty consistant.

I usually think im going to get sick because i get so worked up about thinking im going to that i go into a panic attack and it only makes it worse....

Im so sick of this horrible cycle...its feels like ill never get better even with the help im seeking...

I feel so alone in a world filled with people who like me are scared.

My hands have now chapped and have little red dots on them from over hand washing I was alot to get rid of germs that Im scared will cause me to get sick. I put lotion on but it never really gets to sink in all the way because ill touch something or do something and ill have to wash again....


I go out in pubic and im ok for a short time then i think of everything around me and panic again.


I just feel like its never ending and i dont know what else to do....