Couldn't comfort my fiance yesterday...
The other night, my fiance and I had another couple over before we went to a bar. We all had a little Vodka. My fiance, who isn't a big drinker (so he has a low tolerance) had a lot more than he could handle.
At the end of the night, he was feeling miserable. I knew it was best to keep him cool so I helped him out of his clothes and had him put on some basketball shorts, I kept his face cool with a cold washcloth, made sure he drank water.
Unfortunately, the whole time, in the back of my head I kept worrying that he was going to be sick. I have only gotten close to being sick once while drinking, and I avoided that by taking deep breaths through my nose and exhaling through my mouth. I kept urging him to take deep breaths (something about the flow of oxygen to the brain helps you feel better). It seemed to be working, and once he went to sleep, I was pretty much worry-free.
Yesterday morning, however, he was still feeling awful. He asked ''How can I feel better?" Deep down, I knew that the only way he would truly feel better was to v*. I went out and got him Gingerale and wheat thins, but nothing was helping, and he didn't want to eat toast or the wheat thins.
I would go downstairs and get him water, holding my ears on the way upstairs and holding the glass with my arms. I was afraid that he had gotten sick while I was downstairs and terrified I'd walk in on him doing that.
He had a trash bag in the room, and he asked me to give it to him, and the tone of his voice sounded urgent, I quickly handed it to him and ran away! My heart was beating very fast, and I was really scared.
He knows about my emetophobia, and he knows that I love him with all my heart. But I felt so bad..all I wanted to do was be able to rub his back during and make him feel better.
It eventually happened, while I was in the room, I was covering my ears and I kind of screamed when it happened. My heart was beating really fast the whole time, and I squeezed my eyes shut. I KNOW my fear is really irrational. I know nothing ''terrible'' will happen if I hear or see it...But for some reason I'm still terrified. The sound scares me the most, I don't know why.
I don't know what to do anymore.Once he felt better, then I started feeling terrible. My stomach felt really uncomfortable for the remainder of the day, and I became really bloated and I don't know why. Today, I have been very irritable and I still feel very exhausted and tired. Not sure why I feel like this. Could it be linked to the experience yesterday?
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