anyone else get vivid Images in their heads?

[lauren37]

Recently, I have been thinking that one day i will V* and i get these terrible vivid images of myself V*ing. I get totally grossed out and N* and I think how gross and scary it will be when i do V* it's like I am waiting for it to happen. Anyone else get this?

Also, Due to my emet i have lost about 15 pounds. I gained 6 1/2 in the past 4 months because i am seeing a doctor that I got to every week to get weighed and checked. I also see a nutritionist. She is trying to get me to eat foods that I am afraid of and have a lot of fat. After i gained those 6 1/2 pounds recently it's been really hard to gain. I am really trying. I try to have ice cream every night but I get really full. I only eat like 7 different foods and its so hard to get back to eating stuff i used to that I am afraid of. I just feel kind of hopeless like there will never be a day where i can eat whatever I want and not be worried or nauseous. Any advice? feeling kind of hopeless

[hairyfairy]

I wonder all the time what I would do if I felt ill while out in public. It happened many years ago when I felt faint & giddy because it was a hot afternoon, & I hadn`t eaten for a few hours. I took an anti-emet, & it worked, but I shudder to think what would have happened if I had vted in the street in front of other people. That memory still gives me the creeps, as I can visualise myself "losing it" in public at any time.

[eve]

Hey there, when my fear first began when i was 9, i was very much like yourself. At 9, i weighed 3 and a half stone and survived on one food- twixes! I was so skinny, it was horrid. People thought i was anorexic when in fact, i was an emet! Im 19 now and am a fussy eater, but eat alot of different things. I mainly struggle with meat, wondering if its cooked. I drive my family insane by asking if its cooked hundreds of times! Im now a size 10/12, but let me assue you you will soon be better! Its about learning to trust new things, gradually building your portion sizes and dont eat anything that overwhelms you with panic, as it will only worsten the fear of that food! Its quite bad, but I eat alot of packaged food because i can trust it, like crisps, chocolate, sandwiches. I need to seriously improve my diet!

[lauren37]

thanks i am working with my thearapist with trying new foods we actually eat dinner together!