Words of Wisdom Please?

[ninabeana91]

I'm 19 years old, and I've always been fairly afraid of throwing up, but it's only very recently that I've considered the fact that I might have this phobia.

My boyfriend recently was sick from drinking too much. It wasn't even that bad of an ordeal, he just felt sick, threw up a few times and was OK for the rest of the night. I love him very much, and I stayed with him the whole time, but now I just feel like a mess. I just keep picturing the whole thing happening and it makes me so, so miserable. I can't understand why I feel this way. Most people just deal with these unpleasant things and then move on with their lives, but I cant stop letting it haunt me. I feel so terrible and so upset. I've been on the verge of tears for three days now, and I just can't get the whole experience out of my head. Just the sounds and the smell and the fact that he was so sick...The worst thing is, my boyfriend is usually the person I go to when I'm upset, but I don't want to make him feel bad, so I've been pretending I'm fine. I'm really not fine. I'm so upset I don't know what to do. I'm even angry at him for being so foolish as to loose control like that, and leaving me to suffer when he can just move on, and I know that that's just terrible, because he didn't mean to. But now, what's happened has happened and he's moved on and I'm left feeling rotten and alone.

Please, does anyone have any tips on how to make this feeling go away? I know there's no simple cure, but I need to go on living my life and I feel like this ordeal is haunting me and standing in my way. Does anybody have coping mechanisms they can share with me to help me get over this incident? Or just some words of wisdom? I'm so scared and ashamed, I just want to die.

[olschesky]

first off, welcome to the forum....

don't be ashamed of the way you feel........we have all been there before .....several times in fact.

i would just try to keep my mind distracted......don't leave any room for emet thoughts in your brain......try and get your life/routine back to normal. it's kind of normal for an emet to get "angry" when a loved one does this......i kinda took it personally for a while.......like he was doing it just to "get" to me.

for me, knowing that i can't "catch" being sick from a drunk makes it alot easier for me to get through......now a sv is a whole other story.

be strong....push this out of your mind........you can do it

[ninabeana91]

Thank you for your support. It really, really helps to know that someone understands and has been there before. I'm going to try to distract myself in every way possible.

I was really worrying that this feeling of anger and sadness wouldn't go away, and would affect my relationship with my loved one. It's such a relief to know that it will (hopefully soon) go away.

I can't thank you enough!

[Verity]

Cbt!!!!!!!

[ninabeana91]

Cbt stands for cognitive behavioral therapy, right? Do you (or anyone else) know how this would work? Also, can anyone recommend a place to find more information about how to start such a treatment?

[jds]

You know I used to be like that too. If I heard or saw something like that I'd obsess about it too. Now, what I'd do to cope with that is LAUGH!!! Like the old adage, what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger, just laugh about it. I've dealt with people getting sick from drinking a million times and was right next to them, but I learned early on to take away it's power by laughing at it.

Don't get me wrong, I don't laugh in the face of the person affected, but instead afterwards when they are feeling better. I even go so far as to micmic their noises and etc, but the effect is that I trivalize it. Kind've like if you watch a really scary movie, but with someone who really makes you laugh, the movie is not scary anymore.

Laughter is the best medicine!!

This is just my opinion of course!