cure=weight gain

[cassiefp]

Based on another topic I can see that I am not alone on this......my therapist wants to explore my emet and see if I want to get better. I told him flat out that I use my emet to control my weight. I have been emet since age 10 but I started using it as a weight control about 5 years ago. I have maintained about a 15 lb. loss due to it. I don't think I could give it up! It has become a two-fold phobia. Scared of v* and scared of weight gain. What do you guys say?

[skinnyme]

I say you are definitly anorexic. Being afraid of weight gain from eating and not eating due to emet is exactly what I do... I posted in your similar thread. But you are exactly like me when it comes to eating... But the thing with me is that if I am cured someday then I will still have my eating disorder... So basically my emet only plays a small part, so I don't worry about gaining weight. Is there other reasons that you don't eat? In my opinion anorexia is so much more then wanting to be thin... In my case, I feel as if when I don't eat I feel good about myself.

[sparky2004]

It seems that you have based your self esteem on how much you weigh and how you look. Who cares what other people think of you?


This outlook you have is very damaging. Is your weightso important to you that you allow it to affect every other factor in your life? You are much, much more thanhow much you weigh and how you look.


Your body is a temple that needs nourishment, and your heart an ocean that you need to explore. May I suggest that you seek outside help to start you off in the right direction? We all need assistance to get through sometimes, and there is no shame in admitiing that there may be a problem. I hope that you can reach out and get the assistance you need to fight.

[mitch4133]

I think I am the oppoiste. I feel better when I eat, I really want to gain weight, but I am depressed, I don't eat. I am 5'8 and only 94lbs, I really want to eat and gain weight, but I am to scared to eat, because I think I might get sick. I also have found that when I am depressed, I do not eat, and when I am feeling happy, I eat almost anything. It's just that I have not been to happy with my life lately, and I don't want to eat, or do much of anything. I am in a crappy relationship, I just had surgery and I am trying to recover, I got laid off from my job back in Aug. and I can't even start looking for a job until I am better, and I am completely broke, I have no money at all from all of my medical bills (no insurance). I just sometimes feel that my life has no purpose, and I don't eat. It's really hard, and I want to gain weight cause I look at myself in the mirror, and I look like a skeleton. But I just am so scared to eat. I am just glad that I have you guys to talk to about my problems, otherwise I don't know what I would do.

[mom5]

i wish i didn't wanna eat, but it sure doesn't stop me~!

[nat10]

hi everyone! i have not been on this site for a few months as my emet has been loads better but thought i would have a look to see how you are all doing and i came across this discussion which i found interesting! since my emet has been better i have put on weight and hate it, sometimes i wish it would come back which i know i will regret when it does cos it usually does when im least expecting it!
it just seems like now im not obsessing over not being sick i am now obsessing about my weight! my friends think im mad cos im 5 foot 7 inches and a healthy 10 stone (140 pounds) so im not fat but i get so down when i put on a few pounds, i have just joined a gym and i sometimes eat now and wish i would be sick so i wont put on weight which i could never of imagined doing before!
i think that to suffer from emet to start from your are an insecure person, in my experiance anyway, and it is apparently fact that alot of emets become bulimic or anorexic so it shows that we all are quite obsessive about things. would be nice to just get rid of all hang ups and feel happy about our lives! xx

[cassiefp]

Just because I care about the way I look doesn't mean I have low self esteem. I actaully have very high self esteem. I get that hig from my sharp mind, my loving and giving heart, my relationship with God, my ability to have a lot of friends who love me AND that I take care in the way I look. It is disrespectful to your body to let it look any less than the best it can look AND feel. It also shows respect for my husband and his desires. No man wants to come home to a fat, frumpy wife. Fat, frumpy women are most of the time ashamed of the way they look and act emotionally because of it, which is usually bitchy! But really none of that has anything to do with emet and that is why we are all here. so.....on that note, yes, my emet has given me an opportunity to control my weight. If I ever desire to treat the emet I will have to face the weight issues.

[wing]

I think lots about my weight but i eat because my love for food outweighs my thinking for wanting to be skinny. I feel fat though. Last time i weighed myself was at the doctors at the end of January and that was about 89 lbs, but its okay because i'm 5' only i think. Yea self esteem for me is part of it. I have low self esteem.Edited by: wing

[terified girl]

I definately say yes to emet = weight loss, and I love that part of emet only. I lost 30 lbs thanks to emet, and I know that if I started to enjoy food again I would gain back those 30, or maybe not, who knows!

[Jenneh]

wow... you all sound pretty much identical to me a few years back....


if any of you go into therapy, you DEFENITELY need to make sure the therapist is awre of this other complex of putting weight on... and as soon as possible, it's best to catch it early.


Jen xxxx

[trickyvicky]

I'm not going to say anything about you noteating but what i do have to comment on is what u say about "what husband wants to come home to a fat frumpy wife"......I have put on weight for the first time in my life since falling ill 4yrs ago i went down to 7st 2lb and for my height that was very low but since taking tablets i have put on 2stone....now i don't think that if i had a partner that he would feel that way about me beingfat and if he did then he's not worth it....its what's inside that counts,u can have a skinny women but has no personality and is not kind but its about the person inside and i know that when i am ready to meet some guy if he doesn't like my weight because i have to take these tablets then thats his loss....so umight think that a husband only wants to come home to a skinny women,but u are mistaken and i think u have to be careful about how u word it and what u say,as some people on here might be offended by what u have quoted....I'm not fat but i'm just thinking about other people on here.....


Vicky xx

[harmonygirl72]

Thanks, Vicky,


I was thinking the same thing, but was afraid to say it. I am a little overweight...not "fat and frumpy", but I'd like to lose about 18 pounds. That comment did make me feel bad for a second, but then I realized that many of you with eating disorders along with emet have problems way bigger than mine, so I won't judge you on one comment. But, thanks, Vicky.....you said what I wanted to!


Mary

[skinnyme]

OK people... please don't get mad at me for saying this... I think was she meant was she doesnt' want to let herself"go"... Some wifes get comfortable in their marriage and just mindlessly pack on pounds and let themselves get frumpy for no reason... I think a man CAN feel unattracted to their wife if this happens. Putting on a little weight... Well of course that's normal, I mean we have kids and it's not easy losing all the weight. But to just get comfortable in your marriage and stuff yourself with food until you weigh 300lbs can easily turn off any man. Sorry, but it is the truth... Personally I disgust my husband... He says I have the body of an 13 year old boy and whenever we make love there is always one of my bones sticking into him... So, I guess it can go both ways. But don't feel offended cause this is reality when you are married.

[cassiefp]

Every women needs to be realistic. All things on the inside considered equal (mind, spirituality, loving heart) a man will choose the hotter woman. And while I don't have to be the hottest Mom on the block, I will make sure that I am the best I can be. That means I am dressed appropriately when he comes home, I don't wear sloppy p.j.s to bed, I wear sexy lingerie, my hair is presentable, my face is pleasant and I stimulate him emotionally as well. It is totally off topic but if you aren't doing these things for your man you probably are feeling pretty sucky yourself. Check out a book by Dr. Laura Schlesinger called "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands." It gives good insight into what a man wants and how it makes a woman happier.

[mitch4133]

Yea but why do women have to do all the work? I dress well, I am thin, and I consider myself goodlooking. My boyfriend on the other hand has gained about 30lbs since we have been together. He doesn't seem to mind that he can gain all this weight. It doesn't bother me that he has gained weight. I guess that it is a two way street. If he is allowed to "get comfortable" and put on extra pounds, and not dress or act the way he used to when we first started dating, then why should I? The focus is always on the women to have to look their best, when did it become ok for the guys to let themselves go? I just don't think its fair. And if someone is comfortable in the way they look, why should we critize them?

[trickyvicky]

i have always been very slim and to be honest alot of men don't like it,they like to c a curvy women,but just because u are bigger then some people doesn't mean u don't look after yourself....there are alot of people that are bigger because of things out of there control......so I DON'T think u should say "that to keep a man u need to be slim".thats just being narrow minded.....i have never had a problem with my weight and could eat anything,even then i looked at every human being as an equal,what ever race,colour or size.........Don't judge people who are big.......they always seem to be the nicest,funniest people........if thats the way u feel about yourself that u have to be thin to keep your husband then thats up 2 u,but don't go telling people to read books about how to keep there men..........i have never had that problem.......and i will stand my ground with this one,because its people like u that make others around u feel that to be excepted u have to be slim.....and they make themselves ill over it and that is totally not true.....

[hippychick]

Did I just step back in time here? lol Each to their own I say. If mnaking yourself all pretty for someone else works for you then go for it hun however I like to make myself look good for me, I also like to believe that a partner of mine really can see past looks or occassionaly wearing PJ's if not...that partner wont last long because they will be kicked out. My partner will know me...the real me, all of me and really, you are giving men very little credit thinking they will run off with whatever little hottie comes their way if you aint always looking good.

[cassiefp]

I never said "that to keep a man you have to be slim" I said that all things being equal, a man will choose the hotter woman. And slim does not equal hot. I said "the hottest you can be" and while "hot" can range from slim to curvy it doesn't mean fat! And there is a point when curvy switched to fat. Every woman needs to know where her cut off point is. Mine happens to be anything bigger than a size 8. I look my best in a size 4 and I will not go bigger than an 8.


I also never said that I don't wear p.j.s, but I did say "sloppy p.j.s" Comfy doesn't have to equal sloppy. Be careful not to misread what I have posted.