in need of opinions

[blogger1432]

i am new to this site and i was wondering if i could get some peoples opinions on trying to get my wife to talk to me about her emet issues and concerns. she sees a therapist on a regular basis and i feel that she talks to him more then me. this is not a jealousey issue at all. i am glad that he is helping her and i can even see improvments in her emet behavior. i do know that i may not be able to help her as much as him, but i would like to know if there is certain things she is struggleing with and anyway i could possably help. i just want to help my wife any way that i can. any advise on how to get her to open up to me would be greatly appreciated.


from,
blogger1432

[NatalyKay]

Well, my boyfriend always tells me that he wants to help and make me happy when it comes to this phobia. That really helps, so my advice would be to sit down and tell her that you really want to be there for her in any way you can. It may help.

[Keeley]

Well, my boyfriend always wants me to open up and i never do because i dont want him to think im insane! Just sit her down and act like a theipist in a way. Like: When did this start? How scared are you? ...and reassure her that you are they're to protect her! ;D

[KaydeeJayde]

I don't think acting like a therapist is the answer at all. That might make her feel a bit interrogated or trapped. I'd just sit her down like NatalyKay said and let her know that you want to be there for her, and that you'll do anything you can to make things easier for her while she's recovering, that might start a discussion, if not, I'd ask her what you can do to help, if anything. Personally, I like for my boyfriend to let me know when he's ill so I can brace myself, for example.

[patricksgirl32]

When I told my boyfriend he didn't quite understand. Which I assume she probably thinks. But he told me.that even.though he can't personally understand what im going through, that he will be there for me whenever I need him to talk, cry to, if I need him to hold me when I was ready and willing. And even though he can't fully understand. The support is what is important to me and it makes me feel secure that my problem wont effect his feelings about me. Don't feel so bad shell come around

[Nicole29]

I agree with what everyone else is saying - support is the best thing you can give her. And just tell her exactly what you've posted here. Tell her that you're seeing improvements with her emet behavior - that will probably make her feel good. Open yourself up and offer to help, but don't push. Often just knowing that someone is there is enough. When I'm having an attack, not only am I dealing with the emet, naseau, and panic symptoms... but I also feel some sort of guilt because I feel crazy - I feel truly insane. And often just his reassurance that I'm not crazy - that he doesn't think I'm crazy - really helps.

[sinkorswim]

i have always found that it got in the way of me being happy with someone. all the more reason to work through it

[wargerbil]

When I'm having an attack, not only am I dealing with the emet, naseau, and panic symptoms... but I also feel some sort of guilt because I feel crazy - I feel truly insane. And often just his reassurance that I'm not crazy - that he doesn't think I'm crazy - really helps.

I know the feeling. I feel *so* guilty when I'm feeling sick and I ask my husband to please go upstairs for a little while so I can be alone, and I'm upset and what not... I just feel horrible and apologize like 1,000,000 times to him and he always says it's fine, not a big deal, and to let him know if I need anything.

[blogger1432]

thank you every one that replied. its very appreciated. 8D

[JadeNight]

I think your wife is a very lucky woman to have someone so caring in her life.

[emmalinda]

im glad you really want to help her and show that you really understand how hard this is. its funny how i cant talk about it to my dad but as soon as he said im here for you em if you need me, it made a huge difference and i was appreciative of it. how did it go? have you tried talking to he yet??