7 year old with intense fear..need help

[mllovet]

My daughter vomited 2 weeks ago and then she saw someone vomit a week ago. Now for seven days straight she is having irrational fears about vomiting. She can't seem to get the thought out of her head. She started the first few days with being afraid to eat, now she will eat but randomly begins crying because she is so scared. I want to do the right things to help her and I don't want to lose my patience...I did once and I feel awful. I was firm and told her she couldn't cry about it...I know that was not helpful. Please any advice will be greatly appreciated! Thanks

[Keeley]

Well, this is what we all go through everyday. After I eat I have a panic attack. Since she is young enough, take her to see a counsler ASAP! I've had this for 5 years now. Just don't get upset with her. When my mom gets mad at me when i panic it just makes me feel alone and hate her more. So from the daughters point of view, get her help, but not medication!!! Medicine in young ages double the risk of suicide. Anyway, maybe since shes little get some candy or something pill like and give it to her and tell her if she takes it she wont be sick. I wish I could have that! Good Luck. It's a hard thing to live with...

[eils20]

my phobia started when i was 4, due to my dad force feeding me some vile green stew he made, and then proceeded to punish me for vomiting by beating me and locking me in my room covered in sick!

im not in anyway saying you are like this, but all i can suggest is that you try and be as supportive and calming with her as you can. you arent an emet yourself im assuming? so as long as she sees her mum being calm and there for her in times like that then she will begin to see its not all bad. my brain obviously picked up that it was a "bad" thing to do and whenever i get a stomach virus i constantly apologise as if im doing something thats wrong and shameful.

i must sound crazy saying all ofthis, but trust me, if my dad had been so kind when i was younger, i may not have been here today!

thats all i can say really. as long as you are a calming influence in bad situations, she'll soon see its a normal thing that happens sometimes.

and i also relate with keely. whenever my mum, or siblings get annoyed with me for asking questions when im having a panic attack it makes me feel worse. dont hide things from her either. my mum often lies if someone has vomited to keep me "happy" but this just makes it worse.

let us know how it goes! good luck. x

[ashley11]

I have a 6 year old who is the same way! Talk to her pediatirtian and find a counselor for her. I did and it jas helped greatly! I have been like this since I was about 6 too. We work on it together! Good luck!

[asianeko]

It's so awesome that you recognize her fear and wish to help her! Everybody else has summed up mostly what I would recommend, but I also wanted to share the key things that one person did to help me recover.

I'm assuming that as mommy (or daddy) you are the closest friend your daughter has. For me, it was (and is) my boyfriend. If it wasn't for his support I wouldn't be where I am today. He was patient with me when I was freaking out over nothing. He didn't get angry with me, no matter how annoying I got. He would keep an eye out for things in film and TV and cover my eyes while pressing mute to protect me. He would also tell me I wouldn't be sick when I needed to hear it. He'd let me sleep with the light on any night I needed. When I decided to do therapy, he supported it 100% and drove me over an hour each way to my sessions so I wouldn't be alone before and after them.

I'm not sure how to really sum that all up nicely, just that with his support I was able to mostly recover. It still grosses me out, but I think it does that to everyone. In your daughter's life, you have the same role that my boyfriend did in mine. Of course there will be some differences, since he isn't my parent. It's hard to find that balance, I believe, between supporting her and encouraging her fear.

I know you feel bad about being angry with her, and you know it didn't really help her. But don't feel bad for feeling upset and frustrated with the situation. It's a hard thing for an emet (somebody afraid of vomit) to deal with, but just as hard for their close family and friends as well. Let us know how everything goes, and feel free to ask us anything that you wish! Your daughter is lucky to have such a supportive parent, you should be proud!

[chocolategirl]

Well, this is what we all go through everyday. After I eat I have a panic attack. Since she is young enough, take her to see a counsler ASAP! I've had this for 5 years now. Just don't get upset with her. When my mom gets mad at me when i panic it just makes me feel alone and hate her more. So from the daughters point of view, get her help, but not medication!!! Medicine in young ages double the risk of suicide. Anyway, maybe since shes little get some candy or something pill like and give it to her and tell her if she takes it she wont be sick. I wish I could have that! Good Luck. It's a hard thing to live with...

The candy pill works like a charm...my mom did that with me when i had issues. i found out when i was older that she did this, and it made me angry, but i was also happy because when she did that it made me feel safe and i realized that it was all in my head. it doesn't help now though lol

[patgisela]

My son started his phobia two years ago when he was 11 years old and he told me once that the biggest help for him was that I was there for him . I took his fears about this phobia seriously and helped him through his anxiety attacks. So I think the biggest help for somebody with this phobia would be a supportive person that the emet can count on no matter what. We are doing professional counseling too with CBT and EMDR.

He is getting better with counseling because he learns how to deal with his anxiety's and hopefully one day the phobia will be gone for good.

[Erica1649]

My daughter vomited 2 weeks ago and then she saw someone vomit a week ago. Now for seven days straight she is having irrational fears about vomiting. She can't seem to get the thought out of her head. She started the first few days with being afraid to eat, now she will eat but randomly begins crying because she is so scared. I want to do the right things to help her and I don't want to lose my patience...I did once and I feel awful. I was firm and told her she couldn't cry about it...I know that was not helpful. Please any advice will be greatly appreciated! Thanks

Aww, poor thing! I remember when I was little, I saw vomit in the parking lot of Burger King, I wouldn't step foot near there for YEARS!

Definately take her to talk with somebody or ask her Pediatrician what to do for the time being.