Welcome to the International Emetophobia Society | The Web's Largest Meeting Place for People With Emetophobia.
Results 1 to 7 of 7
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Posts
    6

    Default Was making progress...now I hit a wall (long-help!)

    the rare times i would get sick as a kid it was always terrifying, but i didnt become phobic until i was maybe 12. i was bad as a teen...had panic attacks hearing people talk about it, would avoid places with drunk people, would snap at people who would say "i dont feel good" (and most of the time it was just a cold or something stupid!)

    ive come along since then...and this was by myself...drunk people/people who worked out at the gym too hard/people with confirmed food poisoning throwing up dont bother me, i can watch jackass without crying (though ill usually leave the room if steve-o is performing...) i can use the same bathroom someone threw up in a day after as long as im positive its not contagious...a whole lot less neurotic in general. one thing i cant shake is my paralyzing fear of the stomach flu

    but im back in nj, where stomach flus run rampant 4 times a year. im literally a psycho bitch during flu season. i nag my family members, always afraid they wont take me seriously and will end up getting me sick. unless its the middle of summer, i never touch and try to avoid babies and small children as much as possible. my boyfriend jokes about taking me on a cruise, but he knows i'll never go for that reason. i avoid public bathrooms year long and in the fall-spring i don't hug/shake hands with/touch just about anyone or anything. the worst part is just going through day to day life seeing people being disgusting, spreading their germs, hearing stories of outbreaks and negligence...it just builds up to where i have panic attacks every night.

    now im getting older and thinking of having a family someday...as great as it would be to raise a kid 99% of the time, i think children are disgusting balls of filth who cant keep their germs to themselves and throw up all the time, any time, for no reason. whenever i see/hear/hear of someone being sick, i panic and avoid the situations at all costs...even if i was holding my own baby...at this point in my life i couldnt imagine doing anything else but dropping it out of reflex/terror. before anyone reports me for child abuse, no im not going to have a child if i never get past that. im a coward, not an evil baby killer.

    if it helps anyone come up with solutions ill describe my fear...someone else's vomit is one thing, but being sick is the scariest and most painful and terrifying moment i could ever experience...not being able to breathe, the pain, nausea, fear, panic, helplessness...i can come to terms with getting sick from being too drunk (though ill scream and cry the whole time) because its a consequence of my actions and is temporary. but if i suffer from the stomach flu its purely from someone elses disgusting hygiene and negligence...and it lasts a whole day...so i spend my life living in fear and panic of other people during winter.

    one of many reasons i need help. whats the next step?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Posts
    6

    Default Re: Was making progress...now I hit a wall (long-help!)

    crap. can someone move this to the private support thread? thanks!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    557

    Default

    Probably a good idea you dont have kids, thats all i can say to your post really.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Melbourne, Australia
    Posts
    4,960

    Default Re: Was making progress...now I hit a wall (long-help!)

    but if i suffer from the stomach flu its purely from someone elses disgusting hygiene and negligence
    Erm... how? If you get the stomach flu, then it's because you've ingested someone else's vomit or faeces particles. How is that someone else's fault? Are they putting these things in your mouth?

    Maybe some therapy would be your next step or you could try and work through some of the stuff that Sage has for exposure, and in the meantime, don't have children.
    Come visit my history blog:
    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.





    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    11

    Default Re: Was making progress...now I hit a wall (long-help!)

    I can totally relate to your feelings towards children and the stomach flu - I have this ingrained belief that children are little germ spreaders of disease and actively resent them for no reasonable reason other than I think they're going to make me ill.

    All I can say is that children in the street aren't likely to make you ill - they are more likely to make their parents ill if they do have a bug, as they will be sharing bathrooms and parents will be caring for them so will be exposed. At this stage it will be the child who gets it first so you are unlikely to come into contact with a parent who is contagious as they'll be at home looking after the kid.

    As for your own children, its a constant battle - I have convinced myself that I don't even want children, but realistically, if I wasn't phobic I'd probably be much more open to it. I think it's great that you want to have children - it shows that you have something to work for getting over your phobia. From my experience I have known emetophobes who have had children and its really changed their lives. They can deal with their children being sick because the love for a child is stronger than any fear. They have also said that they have very supportive partners who come in and totally take over if they can't deal with it. I think putting in a contingency plan can also help so you know that if a child gets ill you know exactly where you can go/what you are going to do to avoid getting ill yourself. That's not being a bad mother, it's just taking a little extra precaution to make you feel safer.

    Hope this helps, and good luck with getting past your phobia!

    xLx

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    suffolk, uk
    Posts
    599

    Default Re: Was making progress...now I hit a wall (long-help!)

    With regards to children - I have 3 of them and in 7 years only one of them has had a sv and was sick just 1 time, that was my eldest. Middle one had rotavirus and v a few times. Youngest has never v at all - so in 7 years I have only had 2 v situations with them and considering my eldest has a very annoying habit of putting her fingers in her mouth, i'd say thats pretty good.
    That being said, on those occasions when they did v, after the initial panic/tears, mummy instict took over so I could care for them and then go and have a little cry to myself afterwards..

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Posts
    6

    Default Re: Was making progress...now I hit a wall (long-help!)

    kaydee, its because they dont wash their hands, cough all over things and touch them, go out sick (my friend once had a sv and went to work, A FOOD STORE, that same day!!) throw up in public, etc. if everyone took basic precautions to prevent the spread of germs, the cold, flu, and sv would cease to exist

    and i dont plan on having kids for 10 years so its all good for now.

 

 

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •