How do you cope?

[ktacserv]

I have a husband and two toddlers, last January we had a horrible run with noro. It was my first experience with a true SV hitting our house since having children and it did not go well at all. I panicked and lost it, and did not regain my composure until several weeks later. I am still very traumatized by the whole chain of events and think about it daily, and now that we are nearing that time of year again my anxiety is on overdrive. I ak very superstitious about Christmas time because as a child I would get a SV like clock work every year at that time. I am probably the only kid in the world who dreaded Christmas. I still hold that superstition as an adult and sure enough, we contracted notorious last year at a new years party.

The worst memories for me are two things in particular : The first signs of outbreak were when I woke up one morning and found my husband looking green, laying on the couch. He immediately told me he had been v all night. I have never seen my husband sick in the 8 years we have been together with anything, not even a cold, so this sent me into overdrove. I went into our bathroom and there was still v beside the toilet, where he didn't quite make it and he was too sick to clean it up. That alone made me want to die, but I couldn't leave our kids to run away from home. I did not clean it up, I couldn't, I left it for him to clean as soon as he was feeling better. We have two bathrooms so I did not use that one anymore, and still make sure I go in there as little as possible because of the memory of what I saw when I opened the door. I have trouble sleeping when my husband is not in bed with me to this day, each time he gets up to pee or whatever I shoot up on bed and think he has left to v.

Then our two children caught it, one right after the other. My husband picks them up from daycare each evening and one day as soon as they walked in the door, my son v all over the foyer right in front of me. No warning. I ran out crying. The next day, the exact same thing happened to my daughter, right in the foyer as soon as she walked in the front door. Now to this day I get extremely anxious when I know they are on their way home, and call my husband to check in and make sure neither pf them are ill. I also do not greet them when they first come home anymore, scared that they might suddenly v like that again. I always make sure to be busy with something in the kitchen when I know they are walking in to avoid them until I feel that window has passed and I know they are ok. I hate that because I know they are looking for me and excited to see me when they get home, but I just can't do it.

How do you cope with stuff like this? I hate what my fear does to me.

[Elski]

I think you need to take the positives from this and focus on them rather than dwelling on the awful parts. Positives?! I hear you say Well yeah:

1. You got through it, yeah you had your moments where you lost it but you still got through it
2. It was over quickly
3. You personally didn't catch it
4. You have a supportive husband who you can rely on to take over when things get too much
5. You've been there/done it so that now gives you the power to make a contingency plan in case it happens again, if you are PREPARED for it, it might make it easier if and when it does happen again
6. You have the people here on this forum who really understand what you're going through who can support you

I really feel for you, I have a toddler too and am dreading the day this happens to our family!

[Rachell]

I feel you. It's horrible to be scared of your own kids but we do it daily. I was on Paxil for two years and that was the best period of my life as a mother. It allowed me to cope, even while I was still scared, it wasn't earth shattering fear like now. I would highly recommend talking to your doctor about getting on some medication for anxiety. I had to stop taking mine because I'm pregnant but I have a feeling I'll be back on them soon after delivery.

Anyway, to answer your question...
1. I like to have a plan for "just in case". That involves having cleaning supplys on hand, mattress and pillow protectors (disposable) on all bedding, clean towels, gloves, mask, trashcans all lined with bags of some sort (with no holes) beside all beds, rugs that can be thrown away in bathrooms and beside beds (then you can just roll them up and pitch em!) and a good book to read.

2. Have some kind of anti-emetic on hand always. But be careful of the dosing when giving to kids, make sure it's kid strength and go by weight and not age.

3. Have at least one person who I know I can call at any point in a 24 hour period.

4. I also have a mantra that I repeat to myself over and over while having to actually deal with someone having an sv. I've done this since I was a kid and it's werid but it calms me down some...I repeat "Just because so and so gets this doesn't mean that I will...and tehn I list all of the families I know in my head who have had only one person catch the sv. I do it until I fall asleep sometimes.

5. I also have tons of songs that I wont listen to anymore because I either had them stuck in my head while having an sv myself or enjoyed it right before my son or someone got an sv.

6. JOURNAL!!! I write like a mad woman when I'm super anxious, it's like the only thing I can do at all when I reach a certain point. It really helps to just occupy your hands and mind somewhat.

7. I have found that smelling mint and or echalyptis (spelling? lol) really helps me calm down and so I bought some bubble bath with that sent.

8. Clean! If I'm not to the point of shut down yet I can clean like no other when I'm anxious.


I hope this helps some. I haven't really dealt with this very well since I have gotten off my meds so I don't have alot of good advice. I look foward to seeing other answers though!

[fixxxer2012]

Jesus i feel so bad for you, what a horrid experience. I would of left and got a motel lol.

[ren2005]

OMG...Im a new mom and dread the day my son will be so sick. Last January, my hubby also caught the dreaded sv, and it was the first time in 6 yrs I had seen him sick in that way. it was like he wasnt safe anymore. It also took me quite awhile to get over that day.
I was pregnant on top of things, so I wasnt eating properly and that upset me as well.
I also ask my hubby everytime he gets out of bed what hes doing and if he is OK.
It drives him mad.
This is what this stupid fear has done to me.
Im praying so hard that this year we are all sv free.
I started seeking therapy too..getting on meds soon too.