Here I am again - since last Fall - with the "bug" season upon us. As I read the messages here, I see myself in so many of you. But,one thing is different. I am 61 years old and have had this problem since I was young. When my children were small, I sort of dealt with it because I HAD to. As I am getting older, it is getting much worse - with anxiety attacks and the whole nine yards! Last year I got my first all out panic attack and my husband thought I was having a nervous breakdown - I think I almost did! Everyone in my family had the "bug" and I waited and waited for my turn - not eating for days and not functioning very well with just daily stuff. My family looks at me like I am an alien from another planet! "it's a natural thing," they say. "It will make you feel better." Oh really?? I am really not one to get too emotional about things. I taught Sp. Ed./Autistism for 22 years. I got beat on, spit at, kicked and slapped so that my glasses went flying! But let someone not feel well, I cave like a wet noodle. It seems to consume me these days. I dream about it and if I see a car pulled over on the side of the road, I think, OH GOD, someone must be sick! I don't look. Pretty bad, huh?
I have had times when I think I am crazy. I am on Prozac and have been for years, but it doesn't take care of it. After all these years, I finally confessed to my doctor about what is happening. He gave me some anti-anxiety meds to take at the time of the panic attacks. I haven't used them yet, tho. I think I will always be this way. I am too old to change now. I didn't even know that there was a community out there with the same problem until last year. I read about it in a magazine and quickly found you. Thank God! Anyway, sorry this is so long - but it really helps me to know that you are here and can give me some understanding and kind words. Thanks, Linda