Are you afraid to drink/be around people who are drinking?

[EMF1300]

I've had emetophobia since I was about 8 years old and have never really looked for online support until today... so it's really awesome to see that I am not alone.

I'm in my last year of high school and of course everyone drinks and parties and I am just too afraid to be near them or to drink myself. Not that it's bad that I don't drink but I'm usually pent up in my room while all of the others my age go out with friends. Does anyone else feel this way too?

[emmalou]

I'm not afraid of being around people who are drinking. I've held friends hair back while they v* after drinking too much! And no I'm not afraid of drinking. But I am cautious. I don't want to be out of control, not remember anything and feel sick the next day. What fun is that?!

[olschesky]

i've never drank either because of emet.....which isort of view as a good thing. for a long time i didn't like being around people who were too drunk in fear of v........but now i can handle it. as long as i know a persons v isn't contagious i can kind of shrug it off........dont get me wrong.....i will go to another room or something........but i don't get the anxiety with it like i used to.

lots of emets do drink with no problem........i'm just not one of them

[Razzle]

I'm not really afraid to drink, I've been tipsy before...however like someone else said, I am cautious. Usually my body sends me signals when I've had more than enough to drink and I stop before I get drunk. So far, I've behaved myself

As far as other people, I suppose who, where, and how drunk they are. If I'm at a place where I can leave or with a bathroom within a good distance with people I know, I don't mind. I've been around my friends while they were drunk enough times. If someone starts not feeling well, as long as I'm not alone with them, I don't freak out. It is a lot different with drunk v* than with a virus....I can't catch their drunkenness

[jsb333]

I've had emet for as long as I can remember, my friends were all drinking on weekends when we were like 15/16 and I was exactly the same, I was terrified and spent most weekends at home on my own haha I hated that frustration kind of feeling stuck! One day when I was about 17 there was one party thing I really wanted to go to and I had a moment of madness where I just thought "I'm gonna go and enjoy myself and I'm gonna drink, at least if I am sick I'll be drunk, have my friends with me and I KNOW it's only because I've drunk and I'll be fine again" I even thought if I am it could help my emet in the long run (big moment of madness) anyway I went had a great time, got really drunk and I wasn't sick! I'm 19 now and when I'm invited out I go and I drink if I feel like it and if others are sick around me I just look away and don't feel as scared because I know it's only alcohol! I've still never been sick from drinking ... And I can drink a LOT! I do panic about it the following day when I wake up feeling wobbly and sick but I guess that's my own fault!

[Erica1649]

It all depends...if I am having a gathering at my house, I"m afraid something is going to happen here so I tend to have my gatherings with minimal alcohol. I almost decided against my annual Halloween party last year because I didn't want anybody getting carried away and two out of five parties we had, my husband got sick after everybody left so that put me in a panic...the first time it happened, he found me down stairs in the bathroom sitting in the bathtub running the hot water so I didn't hear anything....it was a horrible thing...

I am constantly monitoring what people are drinking...our last party my friend Sara mixed drinks (and I know she has more than one bad experience mixing her drinks) and I told her don't do that, you're gonna make yourself sick....well she was almost sick at my house...I sent her home to be sick...I was so frightened to go out the next day in fear of finding a puddle of v somewhere on her route home...don't worry, I didn't make her drive drunk (I'm not that bad) she gave herself an upset stomach from mixing.

I try to keep my drinking to a minimum I know what makes me feel which way. I like a glass or two of wine or Amaretto mixed with fresca and cranberry juice. I can also handle a shot or two...but I assure you, I am so afraid of mixing

[littleme2011]

I'm not afraid to drink but I'm cautious I guess. I stick to drinks that I know I'm good with and I avoid drinking cocktails or mixing drinks too much. I know when I've had enough because my mouth will just go "yuck!" and I'll start slowing down so I stop then or before then. I recall having a non alcoholic "kids" cocktail on holiday last year because I thought an alcohol based one would make me ill.

I do tend to monitor what people drink. My boyfriend got very sick once from drinking too much whisky at a wedding, and he wanted a hot whisky while we were out the other night. I warned him "just the one because of what happened last time" and fair play, he stuck to just the one hot whisky and was fine, then went onto his normal drinks and was fine...Its hard for him as he can handle a fair bit more drink than me like and it cant be easy to have a girlfriend nagging at you.

[EMF1300]

This is all really interesting to read guys, thanks!

I do kind of see it as a good thing that I don't drink... but it would be nice to be more laid back about it. Sitting at home is really getting old haha. Strangely my dad is an alcoholic and comes home drunk just about every weekend but I never even panic in the slightest. That's probably because he drinks so often that I know he can hold his liquor.

[lizzo]

No, I'm not afraid to drink. I am however, not a fan of hangovers

[hopieopie84]

I'm cautious with what and how much I drink(usually limit to one or two) but in situations like going to a bar or club, I completely avoid. I know I can't catch their sickness, but unfortunately I have a friend that likes to get so drunk that she v*, and from what I've heard, she usually misses when she tells someone to pull over. So I just say no when invited out.

[laitka]

I don't drink any more but I'm not fussed to be around drunk people.

When I was younger though I did drink a lot - my friend and I used to drink tequila like it was water! I've only thrown up once from drinking and that involved sharing quite a few *bottles* of wine with a girlfriend! Oh, and suffered a few bad hangovers of course! ha ha

To be honest, I've rarely actually seen my friends sick from drinking and it's probably the thing I'm anxious about the least - I'd much rather go out, shove any thoughts of it to the back of my mind and enjoy myself dancing the night away with my friends!

[Cupcake x]

I'm okay with being around people who are drunk. You can't catch anything from alcohol induced vomiting so it doesn't worry me much. But me myself though, I'm not much of a drinker. Never have been, not even when I wasn't so phobic. I do enjoy a few glasses of wine when I'm with friends or even just on a Sunday night but I don't really like being drunk. The next morning isn't worth it and I hate making a fool of myself. The times I have been drunk I've learned that I'm either an angry drunk or a crazy/loud drunk.. and I HATE that. So I just avoid it altogether Well not always, I'd say I get drunk maybe 5 times a year or something like that (if that).

[Scaredy_Cat]

I'm usually fine with drinking a couple of cocktails and maybe one shot... But this time I went out with friends and they actually got really drunk, even the ones who don't like drinking normally. It was funny at first because they kept hugging me (lol) but then I started to feel very excluded... Sucks being the only one sober in a group of drunk friends. Then I started feeling nervous and panicky and even

[Scaredy_Cat]

a bit nauseous, especially when one of my friends vomited... Felt really scared and had a panic attack. Then I felt super guilty and lame for not being able to have fun like them and for making my friend feel guilty about actually having a good time, all because of my stupid fear. Next time I go out i'm gonna try drinking a bit more, just to see. I can't be babysitting three drunk people again XD

[Afdpt]

I actually didn't drink for years after my friends/peers started because I was afraid a single drink or shot would make me extremely ill. EventuallyI started with one drink at a time and slowly built up. I just reassured myself that one drink didn't make me sick the last few times. Then I moved up to 2 until I was comfortable that way. I eventually make it to the point where I could drink significantly without fear of being sick. I had good times but graduated college and started working and stopped drinking. Now I've developed some of my fear back. I drink maybe once a year these days and until I reach the point of being drunk my anxiety remains.

However, I'm not sure if it was from my taking it slow method of building up a tolerance to alcohol but i have managed to never v* from it even when I've had way more than I ever should have in a short amount of time. Came very close twice but never actually happened. My other tip is to drink a lot of water after a night if drinking before you sleep. It truly does prevent hangovers and the n* the second day. Once or twice I went to sleep after only a small drink of water and had mild headaches/n* but otherwise I had no second day symptoms except being tired from waking up to pee so much haha

[kaiilyn_23]

Not really afraid to drink, because I'm not a big drinker and know my limits. I don't get drunk, sometimes tipsy. I don't mix drinks. Ever. I usually only stick to beer, champagne if it's a fancy event. I don't do shots. I used to drink Vodka coolers but they started making me very nauseous from the sugar content. Being around drunk people doesn't bother me anymore - the other night, I drove home a v*ing friend in my car. I'm at a point where if it's not contagious, and I know that, then I don't worry.

[Felle]

I'm not scared of drinking to the part where I don't let myself enjoy a good cider or two. But I do HATE being drunk! So I limit myself to 3-4 ciders a night, with a glass of water after every cider. And I don't particulary like being around drunk people, unless they're young (usually drink til they v). My parents and in-laws are "older" and drink a lot but they don't drink the the point of v, so I'm fine being around them. Xxx

[dkwtd]

I know what you mean. I am in high school and don't ever drink. The fact that I have emetophobia isn't the only reason why I don't drink but I think it's a big part of it. I am just way to scared that not only I get drunk and end up being sick or that friends around me get drunk (which I know they do) and therefore also get sick. I haven't actually gone out much but just the thought of it and having to say no to anyone offering me a drink scares me. I do track and field at quite a high level so I suppose that could be my excuse for not drinking but I don't know if that will cut it. Does anyone have any advice on how to handle not drinking in a group of people that do. Because I do want to go out but don't feel like having to constantly explain myself.

[Afdpt]

I know what you mean. I am in high school and don't ever drink. The fact that I have emetophobia isn't the only reason why I don't drink but I think it's a big part of it. I am just way to scared that not only I get drunk and end up being sick or that friends around me get drunk (which I know they do) and therefore also get sick. I haven't actually gone out much but just the thought of it and having to say no to anyone offering me a drink scares me. I do track and field at quite a high level so I suppose that could be my excuse for not drinking but I don't know if that will cut it. Does anyone have any advice on how to handle not drinking in a group of people that do. Because I do want to go out but don't feel like having to constantly explain myself.

I used to just tell people I was uninterested (which was actually mostly true, although I did have a slight curiosity.) Once you establish that you're not interested people will stop asking.

[Felle]

dktwtd: just tell them you dont like the taste, or you're not interested in drinking. My excuse is, I get a belly ache and terrible gas if I drink too many. You dont need to explain yourself, they should understand a simple "no", and if they don't, theyre clearly not 'all there'. xxx

[chicajojobe]

I used to be, but I got over it in grad school and actually drink way more now than I ever did in 4 years in college at a big party school!
Not sure if that's good or bad, but it is nice to have fun times and cut loose.

Honestly, I've found that people vomiting from drinking hasn't been a big problem for me. Possibly because I'm past the college stage.

Even if you are in college, though, parties like the stereotypical Spring Break movie where people funnel beer until they get sick are not your only option. Yes that happens at certain parties, but not everybody is into that. My friends and I like to go out for drinks at this Irish pub in the area, and the only time I ever encountered someone getting sick in the bathroom was one night when a sorority booked a party there and one of those girls...lived up to the sorority girl stereotype, lets put it that way. My point is, though, that there's a difference between that, and hanging out with some friends at a bar or the porch of their house sipping a drink and just having fun joking around. It sounds like you'd be fine with the latter, and in that situation you don't have to drink alcohol yourself if you don't want to. You just need to fine some like-minded people you can feel comfortable around, and you'd probably be able to, as you said, be more laid back about it if they're drinking while you hangout with them.

[CharlieCat666]

To everyone in this thread afraid to do drink due to vomiting:
A single drink or even two drinks is very unlikely to cause you to vomit. In fact, drinking in moderation (for those of you who are of age) actually has a handful of health benefits.

[Wolfpack99]

I definitely avoid situations where there will be a lot of drinking. I didn't drink in high school or college and did just a little bit in grad school. I definitely try to stay away from really drunk people. Interestingly, I am almost more angry at someone who get sick from drinking than from an illness. You can't control getting an illness, but you can control drinking so the selfish part of me is resentful when someone drinks enough to get sick. My ex-husband knew about my phobia, so it annoyed me the few times he drank enough with his buddies to get sick in our house. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I was pretty resentful of that!

[Afdpt]

I definitely avoid situations where there will be a lot of drinking. I didn't drink in high school or college and did just a little bit in grad school. I definitely try to stay away from really drunk people. Interestingly, I am almost more angry at someone who get sick from drinking than from an illness. You can't control getting an illness, but you can control drinking so the selfish part of me is resentful when someone drinks enough to get sick. My ex-husband knew about my phobia, so it annoyed me the few times he drank enough with his buddies to get sick in our house. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I was pretty resentful of that!

I agree with this. I'm pretty forgiving if someone gets sick while drinking once or once in a very rare while but I've known/do know people who I refuse to go out with because they drink themselves sick so frequently. Sadly my own sister is one of them, so as much as I love her I refuse to go out with her if there will be alcohol involved. She recently turned 21 so hopefully she will grow out of this once the novelty wears off but until then I avoid drinking with her. I've gotten mad at her on several occasions too because we've hung out the day after she'd been drinking and she's almost v* in the car due to being hungover.

Personally I feel like it's selfish of the people who do this to themselves because often they require someone to take care of them while they are drunk and sick which ruins the other person's good time as well.

[socitycourty]

No, because I know it's not contagious. I have never been a drinker though thanks to my emet. I'm 32 years old and have never been drunk or even tipsy in my life. LOL. it's better that way. My family is full of alcoholics... and so many people who are my age STILL spend every weekend drinking and sleeping it off

[khernández99]

If I did start drinking, I would avoid getting drunk. I wouldn't be afraid of being around people who drink alcohol if they avoided getting drunk but I would worried if there were drunk people and they started V*. I wouldn't know if it were V* because of drinks or something else.

[CharlieCat666]

If I did start drinking, I would avoid getting drunk. I wouldn't be afraid of being around people who drink alcohol if they avoided getting drunk but I would worried if there were drunk people and they started V*. I wouldn't know if it were V* because of drinks or something else.

Unless you're in a college setting, it's pretty rare to actually see someone drink to the point of being sick. If you go to a happy hour (usually like 5-6pm) with a group of friends, you aren't going to see anyone belligerently drunk or vomiting. And if you're of age, I would challenge you to try and tag along with some of the people you work/go to school with if they're going out for drinks. It's a really good way to get to know them better and you'll probably have a good time. Being more social/involved in your community is also a good way to move up in the work world or find out about opportunities that you might not have known about through your school/classmates.

[afraid213]

Yep. My dad was heavily drinking one night when I was 6 and he woke up in the middle of the night violently v*ing and scared me shitless of ever drinking!!

[emkit9]

I just had a terrible argument with my boyfriend tonight because he drank at a party but drank "too much" according to my crazy self i told him to have fun and then when he did i panicked and swore he was going to be sick. I made him stay the night a my friend's while i went home. Im so sad and angry with myself. Wish I wasnt so so afraid but I cant enjoy parties at all. So so so sad. I ruined a good night.

[cmu315]

The only v that bothers me is the kind that is contagious. It’s weird. I definitely don’t enjoy watching others v/helping them with being too drunk or hungover, but it doesn’t send me into panic because I know I can’t catch anything from it.
I do think it is very interesting how our shared phobia takes different forms for different people.