OT: So fed up with school.

[kaiilyn_23]

Totally off topic, I realize, but as you guys know I like to confide in y'all. Honestly you people are on IES are some of the most trustworthy, amazing, caring people I know. It's 1:35 AM and I've just come to this conclusion, so I felt the need to tell somebody. Mom's asleep...

I'm so fed up with school. The people at my school, everything. It's not that I don't want to learn because I do, I want to get a good education. But everyone is so fake. And, there's an as*hole who won't leave me alone because I broke up with him because he just decided we were in a relationship, so now he's starting rumors about me to all my friends. High school drama, it's so stupid. I just can't trust anybody at this school.

What I feel, is out of place. I don't have anything in common with the kids at my school. I love indie/alternative/classic rock and I have a collage of vinyl records. They have Justin Bieber posters on their walls. I'm into art, photography, traveling. They're into designer brands, slutting around, gossiping etc. I felt this way in elementary school but I assumed once I got to high school I'd meet more people... I have, they're nice, and I like a lot of the people I've met.. But nothing in common. I hope I don't sound too cocky or full of myself? Oh, another thing, so tired of my words being misconstrued... being thirteen is soooo not as fun as it sounded two years ago.

I want to travel, badly. See the world. Take photo's, learn. It's not that I want to grow up, I know that's what it sounds like. I'm so tired of living here. I want to go away somewhere. I want to go learn somewhere else, Europe or somewhere in the US. And when I tell my friends this, they think I'm freaking insane and I can see the judgement in their eyes.... and then I wonder what's wrong with me, why can't I be a typical thirteen year old? I'm so stressed this year and it doesn't even have anything to do with the work. Ok, yes it does, but still. Just hate this school. Not school in general, just this school...

end rant. slasjdlasjdkasljdlashfas.... ?

[JadeNight]

My god, I feel like I just read something I would of written when I was 13. Needless to say I can completely relate. That's exactly how I was, and exactly how I felt! I lived in a very stuck up town who assumed because I enjoyed rock/indie/ alternative and anything that wasn't like 50 cent or Chingy (god now I feel old) I was a sad pathetic suicidal person. No lie. That was the infamous rumor about me "Michelle cuts and wants to kill herself because she comes to school wearing the same black hoodie and doesn't talk to people" and ultimately had nothing in common with them. I had my one close best friend who was a guy, and that was that. My "best friend" ya know, the girl you've been close with since forever? turned against me into one of the rest of them. I could honestly go on and on about how cruelly I was treated in around 7th-8th grade....

The thing is that you don't sound cocky at all. You sound sure of yourself. You know who you are and discovered YOUR identity. The media and clothing brands didn't discover it for you. That's too easy. Finding who you are, and what you truly like, influenced by you, is hard. That's why there's so many people that conform and judge--it's easy.

I'm sure from what you described about being a typical 13 year old would make me not want to be typical It seems a lot more harder than it was when I was 13, mostly because of facebook, twitter, formspring, and other social media sites. I have a 15 year old sister, and vicious words/ sarcasm, and disrespect are so easily exchanged it makes me sick.

If it's any consolation, and I'm sure I've said this to you before, is that you are very well mature beyond your years. I'm almost 22 and you are without a doubt FAR more mature, intelligent and driven than most of the young adults in my age group. Just saying you WANT to learn? That's amazing. I wish I could witness that same goal of people in my classes at my college, who just don't do anything and are PAYING for it. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, Kailyn. And trust me follow your heart and stick to those goals of wanting to travel, learn, and do photography. It WILL happen <3

[spilled_milk]

I can tell you for a fact that you will do amazingly out of high school. High school is not the end all be all, as much as some high schoolers want to believe :P I was that awkward photo kid in high school. I didn't run with the popular people. My town was a very rich town, and I was poor (for the town). I got judged for that. I hung out in the photo room with my friends and found my little niche and basically ignored everyone else :P I wasn't teased or anything, but I just refused to participate in the little high school game because I knew there was more past high school. And guess what? I'm about to graduate college, moved across the country, and doing what I want to do. And those kids who played the high school game are stuck at the state school partying with no goals in their lives. (Well, that is a generalization. Of course some of them are doing very well )

Basically what I am trying to say is, ignore them and be who you are! Because high school will be over in a very short four years and then you will have the entire rest of your life in front of you to travel, learn, and be yourself.

[kaiilyn_23]

My first day of school after the break today... I can count my true friend(s) with one hand, & three fingers. I sort of understand though that we're all trying to find ourselves at this point and we're meeting new people, falling for new things etc... but that doesn't give an excuse to disrespect a long-lasting friendship, or I don't think so.

I'm all for being my own person, and not caring what people think. I know a lot of the girls who wear nothing but Abercrombie & Fitch or Hollister think I'm odd because I like vintage clothes and high waist jeans. I don't care about that really. It's just I feel sooo out of place with it all, and I want to strut it and be like "Look at me, I'm different than you all!" but I just can't seem to do that... my one friend though, loves classic rock so we share that passion, but from there on we're completely different... my other friend though our personalities are so similar it's creepy- maybe it's because we've been friends since pre-school? Haha.

I so wish that I could just travel and do school online, but I'm thirteen... I just want to explore, learn new things, new cultures, new types of education... I think my issue with my high school is it's so boring... so, so, so boring. We might be moving somewhere else, simply because for what we paid for our townhouse/apartment, we could be living in a five bedroom house in other areas in Canada, so we're looking into that... and I'm not going to lie, I'm COMPLETELY okay with moving away.

I'm still really eager to study abroad though... most of my friends are dreaming about their boyfriends, weddings, shopping escapades, etc... I dream about going to a new city, learning about it, taking lots of photos, making music, hearing new music... but I have no shame because I love it.

[Cupcake x]

Kailyn I wish I knew exactly what to say to help you out but I think the best advice I can give you is to just stick to who you are and what you love, surround yourself only with the people who you believe are true friends and keep pushing through school. It has to end sooner or later I know being 13 it must seem like you have ages until you graduate but in reality it's not that long.

You're so mature for your age (which you hear all the time) but honestly, I think it's great. You want to experience life instead of just letting it pass you by which is one of the most amazing things a person can do with their time here on earth. I was going to suggest maybe doing homeschooling or an online school and then talking to your parents about your concerns and how you know you would succeed much better if things could change this way so that you could successfully complete school but also live your dreams and experience new things.

You're gonna do big things one day girl, I admire you a lot for that. Never lose sight of who you are!

[deeendnamtoe]

So funny, I was the same way! In middle school I was the ONLY person who listened to punk/rock/alternative and was into art (active oil painter to this day!). I was always labeled the weird one, was picked on the most, didn't have many close friends, couldn't relate to anyone. I got older and got very involved in the art scene and met SO many amazing people. I have such a close circle of friends now. The funny thing is that I just went to a middle school reunion (I'm almost done with college so it's been about 8 years) and everyone was exactly the same: LAME! And for some reason I was being showered with compliments...probably because I decided to not be boring at such a young age. So good for you for not being one of them. Who wants to be boring??? You're smarter than that. And you'll be able to rub it in their faces later like I did