Constant fear of serious illness

[annaki]

So for The past few months, I've been having a fear of getting cancer or some other horrible illness...I cannot stop thinking about it. I think it is becoming an obsession. I constantly want to take my temp, check my pulse, feel around for lumps and bumps. I am lying here awake now because I feel hot and I'm petrified of having a fever (I've had 2 since oct) and I fear that means I have cancer or something bad. At the same time I don't want to take temp because it will prove me right. Ugh. I don't know what to do or how to handle this.
The whole thing started when I got some abnormal bloodwork (went back to normal) later...but ever since then I seemed to have lost my grip on things. I know I am making my husband crazy. I am making myself crazy and don't know what I'm going to do. I just have this suspicion that something is wrong with me and don't think I'll be able to deal with the consequences. I can't have chemotherapy. I think I'd rather die. I couldn't even deal with a little nausea earlier, much less chemotherapy nausea and v . Does anyone have any suggestions for mr? Sorry to ramble on so long. I just can't sleep and feel like I'm dying. It's such a horrible feeling I can't even explain. I just got married and feel like things are slipping away from me.

[annaki]

I feel like such an idiot...I've been laying awake for an hour and a half because I was feeling hot in bed and I was scared to take my temp because I didn't want to have a fever. I just took it and it's normal...and I'm glad I don't have one but I feel so low and pathetic. I am just a mess.